


Past Perfect

by LLN3dseestheLight



Series: The Begining Is The End [3]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, F/M, Gen, Gender or Sex Swap, Humor, Implied/Referenced Torture, Memory Alteration, Multi, Time Travel, Torture, evil lawyers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-28
Updated: 2017-03-28
Packaged: 2018-10-12 02:26:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 73,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10480008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LLN3dseestheLight/pseuds/LLN3dseestheLight
Summary: Xander Harris got since back in time and changes were made-she also learns that it's not so much about changing the past but letting the past change you- and that Love is not easy, safe or fun but hurts like hell, yet can be worth every moment of suffering.





	1. Don't Like Suprises pt.1

**Author's Note:**

> Xander Harris resembles-Jessica Alba  
> Jessica Harris-Brooke Burns(as a Brunette)

_Xander turned and looked around, she was in the Bronze. The band that night was playing ‘Possession’. Looking up at the stage, she saw Oz playing guitar. Jonathan was on the drums and Amy was singing._

_~Listen as the wind blows…From across the great divide…~_

 A _t a table in the corner, Xander could see Willow and Cordelia as they making out. She could almost hear their whispered endearments and moans of passion. Xander turned away from the erotic sight. She began to wander through the crowd. Xander's breath caught in her throat as she saw Spike, who as he had many times in the Before, leaned against the bar smoking a cigarette and well, he just looked bored._

_~Voices trapped in yearning…Memories trapped in time…~_

_Buffy wearing her white satin jammies brushed against Xander **. “I’m not ready for this…”** Buffy said in Xander’s own voice._

_Xander watched as the Slayer make her way to Angel, who was standing by the pool tables. Xander then continued toward the bar where Spike was, he smiled when she stepped near him. “Love’s a lost labor.” He said suddenly. At Xander's confused look he pointed to the dance floor. Where Buffy and Angel stood with there hands reaching out to each other._

_“Shakespeare, again.” Xander murmured. She felt Spike press up against her back, his voice whispered in her ear, “Bloke knew his tragedies, pet.”_

_Xander turned in the circle of his arms, “Can we have a happy ending?”_

_Neither noticed the growing, yellowish-gold vortex glowing beside them. Spike kissed her hard and passionately then pulled away from her, “Not with blood on your hands.” Xander looked down at her right hand. It was covered, almost dripping, in blood._

_Spike then pulled Xander to him, molding her every curve against his lean frame. He nuzzled her neck and Xander’s eyes fell closed. She felt his cool breath as he whispered plaintively, “Do you trust me?” Lost as Xander was in him she could only nod her answer_.

_Suddenly there was a shocking pain! Xander opened her eyes and looked down at the ornate sword pommel sticking out of her stomach. She looked up at Spike as Drusilla came up to him, her arms sliding around Spike’s waist, rubbing against him like a cat in heat. Spike smirked at her, “Wouldn’t change a thing, luv.”_

~ _So many times betrayed...~_

Xander jerked up, sweat soaked and panting for breath. She looked wildly around her darkened bed room.

“Huh?”

***

Xander, Buffy, and Willow were walking under the trees that lined the SunnyDale High School’s sidewalk. Xander vaguely listened to the other girls conversation. Xander was still distracted about the dream she had the night before. It wasn’t until she’d heard Willow say,

“I like you at bedtime? You actually said that?” That Xander began to pay attention.

“I know, I know it was completely unplanned.” Buffy said with a giggle. Xander blinked. It took a moment for her brain to catch up with what she heard. Then realized the girls were talking about sex…as in Buffy…and the having of the sex with Angel.

“I hear chastity is this new craze. All the cool kids are doing it. You should look into it.” Xander said suddenly not wanting this conversation to go in the direction she thought it was going to go. Buffy and Willow both turned in unison and gave Xander that look, the one that said, ‘Xander’s weird. Best ignore her.’ They all sat down on a near by bench.

And the other two girls’s continued their conversation as if Xander never spoke.

Xander sighed. She hated it when they did that.

“I don’t know,” Buffy said as she moved over on the bench so Xander could sit down, “I…mean ‘want’ isn’t always the right thing to do.”

“No,” Xander said with a sharp nod, “want can be wrong.”

“But…to not act on want…”Buffy sighed, “What if I never feel this way again?”

“Carpe diem.” Willow told Buffy.

S _eize the day?_ Xander wondered, _Please tell me she’s not…_

“You know, I think we are…” Buffy said slowly, “going to sieze it. Once you get past a certain point seizing is kind of inevitable.”

“Or, you could be siezeless…I mean come on, Buffy. Are you really ready for something like this?” Xander asked…and that had not been what she had meant to say, she was going to tell Buffy that if she slept with Angel he would lose his soul. Xander open her mouth to say it again but choked suddenly. The words just wouldn’t come out for some reason. Xander took a deep breath and tried again…and again she choked.

Buffy and Willow looked at Xander in concern. “Are you all right?” They both asked.

“Y-yeah.” She got out, and then looked up at the sky. _Okay. I get it. You made your point! This is one of the things that has to happen…It just…_ Xander looked at Buffy and saw how happy she was, _It just isn’t fair_. But then Xander remembered life seldemly was especially on the Hellmouth.

***

Giles walked out to the teacher’s lounge. He saw Xander standing in the hall looking abit put out and worried. “Good morning, Xander.” Giles said quietly.

Xander turned a glare on the watcher. She hadn’t forgotten the trama he put her through this morning, “As if I _hadn’t_ seen you two hours ago. You know when I saw you come out of my mother’s bedroom!”

“Ah, yes, about that…”

Xander watched with no little amusement as Giles face turned slightly red. Xander sighed and knew she shouldn’t take her bad temper out on him so she let the man off the hook as she said, “I know you and my mom are dating. I just didn’t know you were _dating_ . It was a bit of a surprise. So…let’s never speak of it again.”

“Yes, quite right.” Giles said with noticeable relief then to change the subject asked, “Is everything ready for the party?”

Xander nodded, “Except for a few minor details everyone knows their parts. You rented the Bronze. Oz got the Dingoes to play, and for free I might add. Amy and Jono got the decorations covered. Willow and Cordy have got the snack foods covered and Miss Calendar is getting the cake.”

Giles nodded but looked uncomfortable at the mention of Jenny Calendar. Xander guessed it had to do with their short-lived relationship. Jenny had kept a distance not just from Giles, but from the rest of them, except for when Jenny taught Willlow, Amy, and Jonathan about magic or when they need her help with a demon or spell. They really hadn’t seen much of her.

Giles looked up and saw Jenny coming down the stairs with Buffy, “Now remember Xander. Discretion is the better part of valor.”

“You could’ve just said, ‘Shh!’” Xander said annoyed, “You Brits really are such drama queens." Giles glared at Xander as they both went over to join Buffy and Jenny.

***

Spike stared out the blackened window of the warehouse. It had been a week since he had last seen Xander. He still didn’t know what to make of the kiss they had shared or what it meant. But at the moment he really had other problems he should be thinking about.

Namely, the plan Dru had come up with. He had been able to warn Xander. So hopefully she had come up with a plan to out plan Dru’s plan with. _Bloody hell, I’ve been in Cali far too long._ Spike thought.

Dalton walked into the room carrying a big black box, “I have your package.”

Spike sighed somewhat distractedly, “Just put it on the table…with the other gifts.”

Dalton did as told. When Drusilla walked into the room, moving up to Spike’s side. She put her arms around his waist and leaned her forehead on his shoulder and purred.

“Must you be dead set on this, sweets. Wouldn’t you rather have your party in…oh, let’s say, Paris. You know France is lovely this time of year.” Spike said even though he knew her answer.

“But the invitations would get lost.” Drusilla murmured.

“I’ve just had it with this place is all!” Spike all but growled out. Then as he thought of Xander. And wasn’t that a new confusion. He had only meant to be at worst, enemies with the boy-turned-girl, and friends at best. But not whatever it was they were becoming. “Nothing at all comes out like it’s supposed to.”

Drusilla ran her hand up Spike’s chest. He sighed at the touch. “My gatherings are always such fun,” she then walked her fingers up his arm, “Remember Spain…The Bulls…”

Spike nodded but said, “This place is cursed, baby. Don’t you see that?”

“Shh,” Drusilla whispered into his ear, “I have party favors for us all.” She rose up on her toes and licked Spike’s cheek lovingly, “You’ll see…” She pulled away from Spike and wandered over to the long banquet table that had many chairs, woven with red roses and other flowers into the high backs of them.

Drusilla looked at the bright red roses they were the same color as her dress," These flowers are all…wrong!”

They minions who had decorated the chairs looked worried.

They shouldn’t be the same color as her dress, “I can’t abide them!” Drusilla screamed in rage.

Spike turned and raised an eyebrow at Drusilla’s fit, “Let’s try something different with the flowers then.” He suggested to her flatly.

Drusilla looked at the pretender prince and calmed down somewhat. Then she began to eye the long black boxes on the table and slowly made her way over to them. “Can I open one? Can I?”

Spike had to smile at the childlike glee in which she asked.

“Can I?”

Spike smiled, he could deny she princess nothing. “Just a peek.”

Drusilla squealed excitedly and reached for the nearest box. She caressed the latch.

“There for the party after all.” Spike said to remind her.

Drusilla opened the box and looked down at the contents inside it and then smiled a deadly smile, “The last party…ever.”

***

Angel was surprised to find himself flying into the side of a nearby building. He growled and turned to face his attacker. Xander smirked as she stepped under the light of the lamp post, “It’s been awhile since we last sparred, hasn’t it.”

“Last summer actually.” Angel said as he wiped away the blood that ran down his chin.

 "So, it has.” Xander shrugged, “Can’t say I’ve missed it.”

“I suppose, Spike has been keeping you in shape.” Angel snarled as he threw a punch at her. Which Xander ducked easily then she clucked her tongue and mocked, “Frustrated are we?”

Angel growled and landed a kick to Xander’s side. Causing her to stumble, Angel almost grinned then threw another punch. This one connected and Xander hit the ground hard.

Xander knew she couldn’t tell Angel about what would happen if he and Buffy slept together. Whatever annoying force that kept her from telling Buffy was also keeping her from telling him. So, instead Xander was going to settle for the beat down she was going to give Angel… As soon as she was able to get up.

***

The next morning Xander practically bounced down the halls of the school. She was high off the victory of beating Angel in their sparring match. She stopped outside the computer classroom she needed to remind Miss Calendar that she was to get Buffy to the Bronze tonight somehow. She paused at the door when she realized that the computer teacher was not alone. Xander listened to the conversation between Jenny…no, Janna Kalderdash and her Uncle Enyos about Angel and his curse. Xander wanted to be angry but she wasn’t. She hadn’t been in the ‘Before’ when they had found out. Xander knew Janna Kalderdash had paid for her mistakes with her life. Xander wondered if she could keep the gypsy woman alive this time or, Xander sighed in annoyance, if it was another one of those things that she couldn’t change. Xander came into the library to see Giles pacing while Buffy was explaining her dreams to him.

_Huh, I wonder what G-man would make of mine_. Xander thought as she hopped up onto the table. Willow came bouncing in just then and grinning said, “It’s Happy Birthday Buffy!” Willow then hugged the blond girl. Willow then took a seat next to Buffy. Buffy just looked down at the table and pulled a lock of hair behind her ear. Willow frowned at Buffy’s worried expression, “Not a Happy Birthday Buffy.”

“Buffy’s kind of freaked out about her bad dreams.” Xander told Willlow.

“I believe it might be a bit more that that, Xander.” Giles said.

Buffy nodded, “In my dream, Drusilla blindsided me. I couldn’t stop her. Angel was gone before I knew what happened.”

Giles started toward his office, “Let me read up on Drusllia then. See if she has any patterns.”

Xander snorted, “Dru’s got just one pattern. She’s bug-fuck nuts.”

Giles stopped to look at Xander, “And how do you know this?”

Xander opened her mouth, wanting to tell Giles about having dealt with Drusilla before. But realized she couldn’t. Not unless wanted to tell him about what happened in the ‘ _Before’_. Which she didn’t? So instead muttered in a small voice, “Just what Spike told me.”

Giles gave the dark haired girl a speaking look, “So we are to take the word of an evil vampire who is devoted to Drusilla. I have to say there is brilliant logic in that.” He muttered, turning to Buffy, “Why don’t you meet me here at seven o’clock. Will map out a strategy while Xander takes your patrol.”

“But…Giles,” Xander started to whine, she stopped though at the glare she received from the man.

"So what am I suppose to do until then?” Buffy asked.

“Go to classes, do your homework, have supper…”

“Oh be _that_ Buffy.” The Slayer said. Gathering her books, she stood up from the table and then left for her next class.

“So much for the surprise party.” Willow sighed sadly. “I guess I’ll go tell the others.” She stood up and started to leave.

“No. You won’t!” Giles exclaimed. Willow froze in place. “We’re having a party tonight.”

“He looks like Caution Man,” Xander said aside to Willow, “but he makes a funny noise.” Willow frowned then nodded in agreement.

“The party will go on as planned. ”

"But Buffy and Angel…”Willow started.

“May very well be in danger…as they have been and no doubt will be again. The one thing I’ve learned in my tenure here on the Hellmouth is that there is no good time to relax. And Buffy is turning seventeen only once, and she deserves a party. Besides Xander has put into much work for us not to…” Giles said the last with a slight smile.

“You are truly the wisest man of our time.” Xander said with only a touch of sarcasm in her voice, but pleased at the acknowledgment from Giles.

“And Angel is coming to the party,” Willow said frowning, “Even if Xander tried to lose his invitation.” Xander just grinned unrepentantly at Willow, who continued to say, “So, Buffy will be able to protect him and have cake.”

“And that’s important,” Xander said nodding wisely, “…the cake part.”

“Xander!” Willow chided.

“What?” Xander asked blankly.

***

That night in the party decorated Bronze, Angle peeked out from behind a pillar, asking with concern, “Where is she?”

“Shh! Do you want to ruin everything, Deadboy?” Xander asked as she jerked him back around the pillar.

“Yeah, I think I hear her coming.” Willow whispered, from where she was hiding from behind the pool table with Cordelia.

Suddenly Buffy and a male vampire come crashing through the window, they hit the floor, of the stage of the Bronze rolling. Buffy scrambled to her feet and kicked the vampire as it came near her. Making it stumble back a few steps. At the sounds of the fight, the others came out from their hiding places.

Buffy then grabbed a drumstick from a nearby set of drums, spun around and thrust it into the vampire’s chest and pulling it back out, causing the vampire exploded into dust all over the stage.

“Surprise?” Cordelia said as she and the others watched the falling vamp dust.

“Yeah, I think that sums it up. Good thing we decided to wait before getting the band in.” Oz said from his place between Amy and Jonathan. Buffy jumped down off the stage.

Angel goes to Buffy, “Are you ok?”

“Yes, w-what happened?” Giles asked.

Buffy pointed behind her, “Uh, there were vamps out…” she paused and looked around, “What’s going on here?”

“Oh, um…surprise party.” Giles said lamely as he blew on a noisemaker.

Buffy smiled, “You guys did all this for me?” She looked at Angel, “That’s so sweet!”

Xander make a rude noise at that and turned to the nearest person who happened to be Amy, “The damned party was _my_ idea and _Deadboy_ gets all the credit?”

Amy only shrugged.

Jenny came through the door holding a long black box, “Hey, how about a hand here?”

Angel and Giles took it from her and set it down on the pool table. Buffy stepped up to it and Xander wandered over to stand next to her.

“What is it?” Asked Buffy.

Giles shook his head, “ I have no idea. Can, can it be opened.”

“Do you really think you should?” Xander asked.

Buffy rolled her eyes at Xander’s worry, “It’s just a box. What harm every came from opening a box?” Buffy said as she worked the latch and opened the box. Inside laid an armor-covered arm. Buffy gave a disgusted look to Xander, the silent _Ewww_! implied. The arm jumped up, Xander jerked Buffy away from the box before the arm could grab her.

“No harm, uh?” Xander said as she helped Giles and Angel wrestle the arm back into the box. As Xander slammed the lid down on it she glared at Buffy, “Nice going, Pandora!”

“Well, that clearly was the Hellmouth’s answer to ‘what do you get the Slayer who has everything?’” Jonathan said.

“Good Heavens!” Giles muttered as he stared at the box.

“What was that?” Willow asked.

“Looked like an arm.” Oz stated.

"I can’t be. She wouldn’t…”Angel said in and awed tone.

“Looks like she would and she did.” Xander said with a snort, then after exchanging a long look with Angel he nodded.

“Angel?” Buffy asked worried.

“It’s-it’s a legend…”

Giles took another look at the box as Angel continued, “Way before my time…of a demon brought forth to rid the world of the plague of humanity...to separate the righteous from the wicked…and burn the righteous down. They call him the Judge.”

“The Judge…and this is him?” Giles asked.

"Not all of him.” Xander muttered.

Buffy raised her hand, “Still need back story here.”

“He, uh, he couldn’t be killed, yes?” Giles said taking up the narration, “An army was sent against him. Most…many of them died. But they were able to dismember him at least…”

“And the pieces were scattered to the farthest ends of the earth…” Xander finished.

“So all the pieces are being brought here?” Jenny asked.

“By Drusilla,” Buffy told them, “those were Spike’s men.”

“And she’s crazy enough to do it.” Angel said.

“What reassemble the Judge?” Amy asked.

Angel nodded, “And bring forth Armageddon doing so…”

“Just your average night on the Hellmouth, it seems.” Cordelia grouched.

“We must get this thing out of town.” Giles said.

Angel volunteered to be the one to take it. Jenny offered to drive him to the docks.

“It’s a good thing I have a plan.” Xander muttered, the only ones listening to her being Giles and Jenny. Buffy began to whine about it being her birthday as Angel looked miserably at Buffy

***

Xander dragged the long black box behind her, as she made her way to the SunnyDale bus station. She was almost there when Spike, appeared out of nowhere and scared at least ten years off her life.

“Spike!”

“ ‘Ello, luv, you seem to have something of mine, I see.”

Xander dropped the end of the box she was holding and said, “And what would that be?”

Spike looked pointedly at the box. Xander followed his gaze to the box and then looking back at him, “Oh, this old thing? Why Spike, it’s been in the family for years.”

“Not about to buy that, pet. Know it’s the big, blue smurf’s arm. Put Dru in a right tizzy when Dalton lost it, it did.”

Xander sighed, “And what makes you think this is it? Could be something else.”

“But it’s not.”

“How can you know that?”

Spike looked slightly surprised at the irately asked question, “You mean, how did I know you were going to pull the old bait’n’switch? Cause I know you, pet.”

Xander smirked, she couldn’t help it, “You "know' me, do you. I think that line is older than you are, Spike. You might want to update your material.”

Spike did a double take, “Hey, I wasn’t trying to feed you a line. I was telling you what I know, and that’s you, pet.”

“Hurrmmp, you say you know me? That goes both ways. So why wouldn’t you think I would know you’d know and there for not?”

Spike tilted back his head as he attempted to untangle what she’d said. He shook his head impatiently, “Bollocks, you know how to mangle the Queen’s own into something else.” He fought back a grin as Xander made a face. “Eh, anyway from what I gathered of what you said…I don’t think so, cause I could just add on another ‘I knew – you knew’ and we’d be back at he beginning.”

“The beginning of what?” Xander asked, playing confused.

Spike growled, “Don’t, just don’t.”

Xander smirked again, “You never knew me, Spike. Just the mask I put on for everyone. Truth is no one really knows me, in the ‘Before’ or now.”

Spike stilled as he thought about that, casting his memory back about the boy-turned-girl and realized everything he did know about Xander contradicted itself. So her statement wasn’t that far out of possibility.

“I know you. Trust me, I remember…”

Xander cut him off, “ Trust you?” Her eyes narrowed, shaking her head, “Just because _you_ have the memories of the Spike from the ‘Before’. Does not make you _Him_. Your not _that_ Spike.”

"I-I-I’m not, but…” Spike tried to say, but Xander continued to speak over him,

“There is no _but_. You’re not the Spike that had the chip but learned to live with it. Nor are you the one that took a beating from a Hell-goddess to protect a secret. You are not the Spike that burned to save us all. Just having the memories does _not_ make you, him!”

Spike stopped advancing on her. She was right, just because he could remember everything his counter-part had gone through it did not mean _he_ had learned those lesson’s himself. But he also knew he was not the same Spike from this time in the _Before_. The memories had changed him. Some things were different, the thing between Xander and himself was just one of the major differences.

“What would I need to do to prove that I could…that I want…” Spike looked down at he ground and whispered, “What would I have to do to earn your…trust?”

Xander blinked in shock and felt like someone had hit her in the head with a two by four, cause she was sure ‘trust’ wasn’t the word Spike meant. “W-w-what d-did you just s-say?”

“I said, I want to earn your trust and asked what I’d have to do it. I want to know you, the real you. Will you let me?”

With wide-eyes Xander could only whisper, “No.”

“Why not?”

“You’re too dangerous. You know too much as it is…to let you in like that…” Xander shook her head, remembering her dream of Spike shoving a sword through her stomach all to vividly. “I can’t…”

“How can I make it so you could? Trust me, that is.”

Xander slowly began to back away from Spike, the box she was suppose to protect, lay forgotten at her feet. “Have you gone completely crazy? You want to earn my…trust? He’s crazy!” She muttered the last mostly to herself.

“I’m not crazy, at least not yet!” Spike said with a glare. “Why would you think being…” He cut himself off and took a deep unneeded breath, “I want to know you. Your passion…your beauty…the loyalty you possess… All these things draw me to you and I find I don’t _want_ to resist – so I ask again, how can I prove myself. What can I do to make you trust me?”

“Damn it, Spike!” Xander snapped, “How can you think I ever would? What was it you used to say…oh, yes! You were going to rip out the collective entrails of the Scoobies and bath in our blood! As far as I’m concerned, you are just looking for angle in order to betray me…uh…us!”

Spike gave her a hurt look; “I dug you out of the rubble of that church, didn’t I?” He reminded Xander.

“Yeah, you did.”

“See, pet. I’m not such a bad sort.”

Xander looked away from him. Hating herself for what she was about to say. Knowing she might damage the tentative thing between Spike and herself. “You want to 'prove ',” Xander all but sneered the word, “…that I can… Trust you?” Then said the one thing she knew would drive him away from her, knowing he couldn’t do it even when it had been his own idea, “Stake her.”

“Wot?” Spike’s accent thickened to something almost unintelligible in his surprise, rearing back as if Xander had hit him.

It might have been kinder if she had, but she needed to scare him away from her and knew this would be the best way to do it, so she repeated, “Stake Druslllia, your dark goddess, your sire and I’ll believe your declaration, until then though…” Ignoring the box which had been central to the ruse she had been running Xander turned and ran off before Spike could say or do anything to stop her.

Leaving him to stare after her in stunned shock, emotionally and verbally battered in her wake. _Damned if I do, and damned if I don’t with her_. He thought as he walked over to the box and savagely kicked, open the lid to the box, in a fit of bad temper. He grinned at what he found, “Clever, pet. The ‘ole bait’n’switch,” he turned away from the empty box, “only the bait wasn’t what you thought it would be.”

***

After Xander’s run-in with Spike the last thing she wanted to hear when she entered the library was…

“We got ambushed. They got the box.”

“Where’s Jenny?” Giles asked Buffy.

“She, uh, went to get Angel some clothes. I, umm had some here.”

“And you need clothes why…” Then getting just what Buffy had said, “Wait…you lost it! You lost a part to a demon that can DESTORY THE WORLD!!!” Xander yelled at Buffy.

“We got wet.” Buffy said, turning to Giles asked almost desperately, knowing how Xander could get, “What do we know?”

“How-how could you loose it? What were you and Angel doing?” Xander asked wonderingly, “Making out?”

“I…Xander…” Buffy stuttered out, her body stiffened and she wouldn’t meet Xander’s eyes.

“Oh… My… God,” Xander said not realizing she was saying it in true Valley-girl style, “You were!”

“I was not!” Buffy denied hotly.

Xander was about to really lay into the Slayer when Giles cleared his throat, “Girls!”

Once he knew he had their attention began to talk, “The more I find out about the Judge the less I like him. His touch can literally burn the humanity out of you. A creature of true evil can survive the process. But no human ever has…”

"So, what’s the problem? I say we let Cordy fight the guy.” Xander said with a careless shrug, “Cause you know, she’s like, evil incarnate.”

“Hey!” Willow said in defense of her girlfriend.

“Can we stop this guy? You know, without an army?” Buffy asked.

“Uh,” Giles looked down at the book he was holding, “ ‘No weapon forged by man can kill him.’ That’s not very encouraging. If we could only stop them from assembling him."

“We need to figure out the Judge’s weak points an find out where Spike and Drusilla are keeping him,” Buffy turned to Xander, “You wouldn’t know where Spike is holed up would you?”

“Why would you think that?”

“Well, with you being all chummy with him and all…”

“I’ve never asked, “ Xander all but growled, “And he’s never told me. After all it’s not like he…” Xander paused as a thought occurred to her, “…trusts me.”

***

Drusilla stood at the top of the tall spiral staircase. She looked down at the on going party; all her guests had arrived, all save one. But she knew he would appear soon.

“More music!” She cried and clapped her hands together. Slowly she descended the stairs, her head bobbing in time to the gothic music that was playing. She made her way to the decorated table and chairs stopping in front of it she began to dance, swaying side-to-side.

“Last minute prezzie for you, luv.” Spike said as two minions came in carrying a box in the vague shape of a head. They carried it over to where the others stood in the shape of a headless body.

“The last is always the best…” Drusilla murmured.

***

The research was slow going. Xander was sitting next to Jonathan staring blindly at the book in front of her. Listening to Jonathan talk about Amy and Oz with half an ear. “I read this already,” Xander said pushing the book away and trying not to think about the irony of what she just said.

“Oz is really cool about all of the weird stuff that’s been going on.” Jonathan said happily.

“Yay!” Xander said tiredly as she rubbed her eyes, the left one throbbing painfully with every breath she took.

“You’re just jealous cause you didn’t have a date for the party.” Jonathan said with a smirk, “While I had two!”

“No. I _sure_ didn’t.” Xander said flatly. Her tone of voice impressing upon Jonathan that she _really_ didn’t want to talk about it. Jonathan wisely went back to reading his book with out saying another word.

***

“He’s perfect. Just what I’ve always wanted.” Drusilla cooed, as she took in the sight of the tall, armor covered, blue skinned demon.

“And don’t I always get you what you want, princess?”

***

Giles came out from behind the stacks to see Angel staring into his office. Following his gaze Giles saw Buffy asleep over a pile of books on the desk.

“The nightmares Buffy been having are taking a lot out of her.” Angel said softly.

Giles turned away with a sigh, “She’s not the only one apparently.”

Angel shot him a confused glance; Giles just motioned toward a leather sofa in the corner of the room. Xander was curled up, head resting on the sofa arm, fast asleep.

_Xander wandered through the abandon warehouse, knowing she had never been here before. She paused, taking in the sight of the high-backed chairs decorated in roses and other bright red flowers. She reached out to touch one of them. At her barest caress they began to wither, turn brown then to black and finally crumbled to dust, that blew away in a cold breeze. She blinked and continued around the table, where she saw Buffy, wearing a white party dress, kneeling by some long black boxes. Xander started toward her when…_

_"You’re not dressed for the party, luv.”_

_S_ _he turned around and saw…“Spike,” she could help but whisper._

_He smiled sweetly at her, but almost instantly his expression turned into shocked amazement. A stake point protruded through his chest, he desinigrated into dust before her eyes._

_"Trust me,” Angel said as he spun the stake he was holding in his hand, “It’s better this way.”_

_Xander could only scream out Spike’s name._

The occupants of the library were startled by the twin screams of the two sleeping girls.

Angel bolted into Giles’s office, as Giles rushed over to Xander, who with all her thrashing, had fallen to the floor, jarring herself awake. Giles could make out what he thought were unshed tears in the girl’s eyes, and was the only one to hear the soft whimper of a certain blond vampire’s name. He knelt down by Xander and asked, “Are you alright?”

Xander sighed shakily and shook her head, it was the only warning Giles had before Xander threw herself at him and wrapped her arms around his neck. Looking past the Xander’s shoulder, Giles could see Angel and Buffy staring at Xander in concern at the dark haired.

***

“Party favor?” Drusilla offered, as she gestured to the room of vampires.

The Judge looked around, and pointed to a vampire, “That one is fully of feeling,” pointing to Dalton, “He reads. Bring him to me.”

Spike mourned, the demise of the only minion, he had with half a brain silently.

“Ashes, ashes…” Drusilla sing-song as the Judge burned Dalton; she began to spin around wildly, “We all fall down!”

***

After sneaking into the warehouse, Xander, Buffy and Angel quickly made their way to the upper level. They watched the party go on down below them.

_I know this_ … Xander thought.

Buffy said echoing, Xander’s thoughts said, “Saw this…the party, I mean.”

“We’re too late!” Xander whispered harshly as the big, blue demon came into view; Spike and Drusilla flanked him.

Spike noticed, Big Blue stop and look around the warehouse. Then the demon looked up at the upper level and growled. “Well, what do you know, party cashers, pet.” Spike said to Drusilla. Then seeing that not one of the other vampires in the room, was even making an effort to go after the intruders, he shouted, “GET THEM!”

The other vampires finally moved.

“No wonder I lost the last time.” Spike muttered, “They’re all morons.”

Up on the landing Angel said to the girls, “We got to get out of here.” They nodded their agreement to this plan. Spilting up, Angel and Buffy ran to one side of the landing, Xander to the other. But both were meet by a group of vampires blocking their exscape. Struggling against their captors they were brought before the Judge.

Eyes on both of the girls, “I dreamed you both would come,” Drusilla said making a scratching motion in the air and growling almost playfully.

“Leave Buffy alone!” Angel exclaimed.

“How noble,” Spike sneered, “now say ‘please with sugar on top’,” then pursed his lips and made a kissing motion towards Angel, which caused the dark vampire to growl.“The girls,” the Judge intoned darkly.

Drusilla nodded, not taking her eyes off either girl, “Chilling isn’t it. One so filled with good intentions…and the other, such naughty thoughts, that she can’t tell…” Drusilla frowned, stepping towards Spike, “The prince is not for you…” She said with a glaring hiss.

Angel stepped between the Judge and the girl, “Take me…” then seemed to think better of that and motion to the dark haired girl, “…or better yet, take Xander.”

Xander turned away from the staring contest she had fallen into with Drusilla to glare at Angel, “Nice.” Xander muttered her tone implied that it wasn’t though. Buffy just looked at her boyfriend in bafflement. She couldn’t believe he had said that during a life and death situation. Xander really was a bad influence on some people.

Spike made a face, “Let me explain this, cause you don’t seem to get it, Peaches. There is no instead. Just first, second or,” he paused and coldly glanced at Xander, “third.”

“I’ll take both girls,” the Judge said, moving toward both of them. Angel looked around and happened to glance up to see the T.V. monitors hanging from the ceiling by some nearby chains. Drusilla purred in anticipation as she watched the Judge, now reach for the girls, who had now taken up fighting stances.

“Don’t let him touch you!” Angel shouted the reminder.

Buffy kicked the Judge in the chest, while Xander shrugged off her captors and began to fight them. Angel had managed to get away from the vampires holding him just as the Judge came to stand under the monitors. Xander seeing what Angel was about to do lunged away and fell into Spike, who caught her then shoved her away, backhanding her almost cruelly to the face as he did so. Xander stumbled, shaking off the hit and growled at the smirking blond vampire. Angel released the chains to the monitors and they came crashing down on top of the Judge, the combine weight of the Judge and monitors caused the floor to buckle, leaving a hole in the floor. “Buffy, Xander, this way!” Angel called out. Buffy punched the vampire blocking her way then raced over to Angel.

Xander in the course of her fight with Spike was too far away to make it over there. She knew, she had to find another way seeing the window just behind Spike. She got an idea.

“Go without me!” Xander shouted and looked at the window. Buffy seeing this knew Xander had an escape plan. She always did when they patrolled and knew this time was no different.

Xander gave Spike a kick to the stomach, knocking him away from her. She ran towards the window, covering her face with her arms. She jumped smashing through it. She landed hard, almost knocking the breath out of her, on the ground. Shards of glass all around her, she quickly got to her feet.

***

“AFTER THEM!” Drusilla screamed at the minions pointing to the hole where the Slayer and Not Daddy, had disappeared through.

Spike snarled at four nearby fledges, “You’re with me!” Then jumped through the broken window. Never noticing, the enraged look Drusilla gave him.

***

Xander ran. Leading Spike and the other vampires following her on a merry little chase through SunnyDale. It had been fun until it started to rain. It wasn’t a misty rain or even a light drizzle. No, it had it start pouring by the bucket full. It was time to end this and go home to get dry.

All she had to do was let Spike catch her.

***

Angel and Buffy ran through the sewer tunnel. Losing the vampires chasing them in the process. Soon they came to a ladder leading up to a man hole. Climbing out of the sewer and into the dark raining night.

“We have to get out of this.” Angel told Buffy, who nodded. They headed in the direction of his apartment.

***

Xander hit the ground; the growling vampire following her down. Stupid move on it’s part because Xander was able to shove the stake she had through its heart. As it dusted, Xander rolled to her feet wearing a disgusted look. Because of the wind and rain vamp-dust was now plastered all over her. Xander glared at Spike and the other vampires with him, “Are we _done_?”

At the question, two stakes appeared in Spike’s hands. He quickly staked the minions that were flanking him. The third stared dumbly at Spike for half a second then turned and ran.

“No, you don’t.” Xander said pulling a stake from the sheath she wore at the small of her back, she threw it at the minion, impaling it through it’s back.

“ _Now_ ,” Spike smirked, “We’re done.”

“Goody.” Xander said blandly then promptly sneezed.

Spike frowned, as he looked at the rain soaked and shivering girl. “Come on,” he told her, “Let’s get you home and out of this.” Xander nodded and turned in the direction of Xander’s house.

***

Drusilla paced and growled. The minions watched their mistress in growing fear.

She knew what was in the pretender’s heart. He thought he could fool her. Soon he would show his true colors; soon he would come back to her.

***

“You know, pet. When you improvise on a plan. It would be nice to have some notice.” Spike said as they stepped on to the porch.

Xander faced him, “Spike, it’s not like you did anything to stop the Judge from being assembled.”

“It’s what Dru wanted.”

“And you, live and breath for Drusilla, don’t you?”   Xander sighed and turning away from Spike said, “Look it’s late and I’m cold…” Spike grabbed Xander’s arm and spun her back around to face him. The slight growl he gave was her only warning as she was shoved up against the wall, by the front door of her house, with Spike’s lips on Xander’s before she could do anything. This was * not * like the first kiss they had shared. That one had been mostly curiosity, sweet, playful and slightly insulting to one of them. It had been everything the first kiss between them should have been.

This one though was completely different…this was… _heat_ and _lust_.

Spike molded his lean body to hers, pressing Xander hard into the wall. His hands buried themselves into the long, dark, wet tresses of her hair. Xander’s hands had come up and rested on his shoulders, at first to push him away but…her fingers clenched into the leather of Spike’s duster. Heady was the burn of pure passion, of someone who had one hundred and twenty odd years of experience, that was intent on making the girl in his arms _want_ him. One of his hands left Xander’s hair, caressing her side, stopping down at her waist. Then neatly slipped under the t-shirt she was wearing. The cold hand, against her warm skin brought her back out from the seductive spell Spike was weaving around her. Xander pulled her mouth away from his. He tried to follow but she turned her head away, “Wait…” she whispered. Spike began to trail; cool, wet opened mouth kisses up and down Xander exposed neck. Under her hands she could feel Spike almost shaking.

“Please,” Spike pleaded softly, as he pressed the kisses against Xander’s neck harder, “Let me!”

Xander turned her head back to look at him, “I…wait…” it was all she was able to get out before Spike kissed her again, tangling his tongue with hers in an erotic dance as old as time. Xander was utterly consumed by this passionate creature in her arms. Each kiss became deeper, making her blood catch fire. She didn’t even hear the thunder or notice the bright flashes of lightening as the storm raged around them.

“Y-you hav-ve to…” Xander tired to say once Spike, let her breath, but sucked lightly on her neck.

“Please,” was purred into her ear in the same soft, almost pleading tone.

“…No…stop.” Xander said, just as softly but firmly.

Spike froze at the words, he looked into confused and passion filled brown eyes.

“Stop?” He question because the girl’s scent gave a whole another answer. He knew that Xander wanted him on the most primal of levels.

Xander took a deep, shuttering breath and, unknowing from her dream, whispered, “I’m not ready for this.”

Spike could see that Xander, while aroused, was also afraid of what she was feeling. He nodded, stepping back and said, “It’s late, you’re soaked, you should go inside.” He took another step back and was about to turn and go when Xander’s hand shot out and grabbed the lapel of his duster, stopping him. They stood there staring at each other for what seemed like forever to both of them. Xander stepped forward and Spike sighed, dropping his head to her’s until their foreheads touched. Lightening flared brightly and a thunderous roar of thunder crashed around them, causing Xander to jerk her head up,

“Did you hear that?”

Spike listened, shaking his head, “Nothing but thunder, pet.”

“Strange. I could have sworn…” _That I heard someone scream out Buffy’s name_. Xander thought.

“What’s wrong?” Spike asked.

Xander ran a hand through her hair and sighed, “Nothing.”

Spike’s look said he didn’t believe that, but he wasn’t going to push.

“You should get back. Before Drusilla…”

Spike expression said he wanted to say something but he just sighed settling for, “Yeah,” before turning and disappearing in to the stormy night.

Xander entered her house. When she closed the door behind her, leaning back against it and thought, ‘Why does it feel like I’m the 'other woman'…

***

When Spike returned to the warehouse. Drusilla was waiting for him, her arms crossed over her chest and tapping her foot impatiently. “Our enemies still live…”

Spike only shrugged in reply.

“…I’m not happy.”

Spike groaned. When Drusilla wasn’t happy, that meant Spike wasn’t going to be happy.

The ranks of the minions would suffer for the unhappy state of their Master and Mistress.

***

_Xander blinked as the bright sunlight shone through the long, dark veil she was wearing. The name on the tombstone said, **Angel**. Xander noticed idly. She stared down at the coffin. But at a slight noise looked up to see Angel…no, Angelus standing next to Buffy across the grave from her._

_"You have to know what to see.” Angelus told the confused looking Slayer, who turned to stare at Xander. Slowly Xander lifted the veil, a puff of cigarette smoke drift past her vision. Turning in the direction it came from, Spike stood next to her._

_“We’re not always who you think we are.” Spike said with his dark, trademark smirk. Spike dropped his cigarette. Xander watched as it fell as if in slow motion to the ground. Xander's eyes shot back to Spike in time to see him morph into game face as he went for her throat…_

Xander’s eyes snapped open. She sat up in her bed, blinking at the sunlight filled room and tried not to shake.

***

Drusilla lay on the long table, where her sweet pretender had put her after the vision of her Daddy had passed. She stared, listening to the whispers in her head. They told such an amusing tale…it had come to be her favorite, about a kitten howling in pain and suffering, and the pretender prince who tried to take the crown. How their chance meeting would change the world…It was a pretty, pretty fairy tale. Sometimes, she thought, she could touch the feelings of it. So powerful they were…

“Are you feeling better,” the prince of the story asked her, as he stroked her dark hair from her face.

“Mmm, I named all the stars…”

“You can’t see the stars, luv,” the sigh of annoyance came, as Drusilla knew it would. “That’s the ceiling” Drusilla wondered, if he thought she was stupid, “Also it’s day.” Of course it was…

“I’ve named them all, the same name…a secret name…” Drusilla tilted her head back to look at him. “The one that whispers in your heart…”

The pretender pulled his hand way, frowning at her as he asked, “What happened to Angel, Dru.”

A male cleared their throat, causing the pretender to spin around to face the other, Drusilla rolled to her side so she could see, “Well,” Not Daddy came into view, but he was different now…changed it seemed. She could tell just by the way he moved. The dark vampire dripped seduction in only the way her _Daddy_ could.

“You’re just not going to give up, are you?” Drusilla heard the pretender ask.

She grinned when she saw the Judge come up behind not Daddy, now he would burn.

But was amazed when Not Daddy just smirked at the Judge’s touch and said, “It tingled some.”

Her _Daddy_ had come home to her, after so long… “Angel,” she whimpered hopefully.

“Yeah, baby. I’m back!” Her Daddy’s grin was a thing of dark beauty.

***

After Xander and Buffy told Giles everything they knew about the Judge. They went to their classes. Each lost in the thoughts of what they had done after they had separated the night before. Both Xander and Buffy were feeling lost and afraid though for different reasons.

***

“You’ve come home to me…” Drusilla said, “to us!” She corrected at Spike’s disgruntled sound.

Spike, who would forgive Dru anything, just didn’t buy that sad cover. He knew he wasn’t whom Drusilla truly wanted, craved. But he had been good enough for her for almost a century. He wasn’t about to give Drusilla up. He loved her; he was comfortable with the woman who chose to gift him with darkness, unlike his growing relationship with Xander, which was anything but comfortable. Spike crossed his arms over his chest as he eyes the dark vampire warily, he knew just how unpredictable Angleus could be, “So, no more soul, huh?”

Angelus shrugged as he walked by the table, striking a match on it and lit the cigarette he now had between his lips, “I was going through a bad time.”

Drusilla stood up, walking down the length of it towards Angelus, swaying side-to-side.

“Such happy songs fill my head. ‘Zippity-do-duh. Zippity day…what a wonderful day!”

“We’re going to be a family again, darling girl!” Angelus laughed he helped her off the table spinning them around, causing Drusilla to giggle.

“Fun games, I see ahead…” Drusilla purred then snapped her teeth playful at Angelus. When she faced Spike her expression was angry, “Her screams will ring through the air, my prince.”

Spike carefully kept his face blank at Drusilla’s taunting remark.

“You wouldn’t believe what caused my return.” Angelus said his tone across between disgust and smarm.

Spike tried not to roll his eyes. Angelus’s return had to have been something Xander couldn’t or wasn’t able to stop. Since Angelus never Spike told in the ‘Before’ just how the Slayer had released him, Spike didn’t know what caused it or how to stop it. Xander had kept surprisingly mum on the subject. But certain things she had said alluded to one thing. “Don’t care, mate. Not even if you got a leg over with the Slayer herself.”

“Th-that’s awful, Spike!” Angelus choked, as he put his hand over his heart, “You’ve just reduced the most beautiful and romantic moment between Buffy and myself to a bit of dodgy British slang.” He gave Spike a look of mock hurt then grinned, “I always love it when you do that!”

Drusilla leaned forward and whispered, “I’m trying to destroy the world. Want to help?”

Angelus played with the cigarette he held before tossing it way, “Destroying the world, huh? Sounds like fun. But I’m really more interested in the Slayer.”

S _urprised I am not_. Spike thought but said, “Well she is ‘in’ the world…”

“Give me until tonight, hmm?”

“What do you mean?” Spike asked.

“Lay low and I guarantee buy the time you go public she won’t be anything resembling a threat.”

“You _really_ want to hurt the Slayer, don’t you?” Spike had never understood Angelus’s obsession with hurting Buffy emotionally, when it really was so much easier just to kill her and be done with it.

Angelus stepped away from Drusilla, “She made me feel like a man…” Angelus paused, Spike thought he saw something a kin to affection in his eyes, but it quickly disappeared and Spike wrote it off as a trick of the light. “…Human. You just don’t let something like that go. Slowly he began to circle Spike, “But what about you, Spikey-boy,” Angelus stopped behind him pressing close, he purred growled into Spike’s ear, “You haven’t gone and done something foolish now,” Angelus caressingly trailed a finger down the blond vampire’s back, stopping just over his heart. “… have you?”

Spike shuttered slightly at the dark vampire as the unspoken threat came through all to clearly. Spike spun around to face Angelus, giving him a cocky grin, “Nah, mate just thought I’d take a page out of your playbook.”

Angelus gave him a confused look.

“Didn’t you know? Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.”


	2. Don't Like Suprises pt.2

Xander lay, on her back, on top of the counter studying the book in her hands. Giles was in his office going through some more books. Cordelia walked by holding a book in her hands, muttering, “Why can’t these old things be written in English?”

Willow was, “Ok, no, no, he didn’t. But I’m sure he’ll…” on the phone trying to placate Buffy. Xander just sighed, putting her book over her face.

“…Angel is *not * dead!” Willow said into the phone, she twisted the phone cord in her grip worriedly, “Yeah, will be here. Okay, bye.” Then she hung up the phone.

“So what’s the word,” Xander asked, the book muffling her voice.

“Buffy said, she checked every place she could think of. Even beat up Willie. Angel’s gone.”

‘ _Oh, Wills, you have never spoken truer words_.’ Xander thought depressedly.

Giles opened the door to his office, “Angel does vanish on occasion, doesn’t he?”

Willow nodded, “But she’s extra wigged this time. Because of her dreams, I guess. Do you think something might have happened to him?”

“She is going to joins us?” Giles asked.

“Yeah, she’s just stopping at home first.”

Xander pulled the book from her face and tossed it onto he counter. Startling Willow, who jumped at the sudden noise. Xander rolled off the counter, landing on her feet, “I’m going for a walk,” she muttered as she walked out of the library.

Cordelia came up next to Willow, “Is it just me or is Xander acting stranger than normal?”

***

The course of Xander’s walk took her around the school twice. Now she sat on the bleachers in the football field watching in all it’s red, purple and orange glory, as the sun set. ‘How am I going to fix this mess?’ She wondered.

***

Cordelia and Willow walked down the hall, whispering to each other about the Judge, Buffy and Angel’s romance and Xander’s general state of weirdness. When the lights above them flickered then died.

***

Xander had just reentered the school when the lights went out, “That can’t be good.”

***

“We should get back to the library.” Willow said. Cordelia nodded.

“Willow. Cordelia.” A voice in the dark called out. Both girls froze. They turned and saw Angel standing behind them.

“Angel.” Willow said in relief.

“Oh, good you’re still alive. Now maybe Buffy will stop being such a pain.” Cordelia said ever tactlessly.

"What’s up with the lights?” Angel asked.

***

Xander slowly made her way to the library; she was almost there when a familiar sound caught her attention.

Flick-hiss.

It was the sound of a Zippo lighter. There against a row of lockers, Spike was leaned...

“What are you doing here?” Xander asked.

Spike took a long, slow drag off the cigarette, and exhaled before answering her, “Waiting.” The air of careless menace Spike radiated wasn’t something Xander had seen in a long time.

“For?”

“You, of course, pet.” Spike said as he pushed away from the lockers, “Vengeance is a living, breathing thing.” Spike gave Xander a knowing look, “But you’d understand that better that anyone. I’m sure Anyannka taught you a thing or to about that subject.”

“What?” Xander asked, because this was making no sense what so ever to her.

“Seems Angelus has a real hardon to make your Slayer hurt.”

Xander looked past Spike towards the library, “They don’t know!” She started by Spike, but he grabbed her and threw her into the row of lockers hard enough to knock the breath out of her. His hand wrapped around her throat squeezing, it brought tears to her eyes. Feral, yellow-gold eyes and the sharp fangs of Spike’s game face filled her vision. Xander unprepared for the attack could only stare at the growling vampire.

Suddenly the hall doors burst open and Angelus came tearing out and barking, “Come on, Spike!” 

“That’s just unfair, you got to play with your girl.” Spike bemoaned taking his hand from her throat.

_“Now_ Spike!”

Spike only sighed and morphed back into his human face.

“Spike?” Xander asked in disbelief, she had been so sure…

Spike pressed her against the lockers; his lean frame molded to her every curve. She could feel his cool breath against her. Shocked brown eyes clashed with cold blue eyes. Spike leaned in as if to kiss her, but seemed to think better of it. Instead he gave her left cheek a busting, betraying kiss. Then quickly followed his grand-sire out.

Xander slid down the wall of lockers to the floor. She wiped at the spot on her cheek with the back of her hand.‘ _I am a fool! I am such a fool!’_ Because Spike’s actions had actually _surprised_ her.

***

Giles paced, Willow and Cordelia were cuddled on the sofa. Jenny stood leaning against the bookshelves nearest to them. Buffy sat at the table and Xander stared sightlessly out the window. Xander barely heard any of the ensuing conversation.

“…Angel has reverted…”

“…Going to do?”

“…Blind panic myself…”

“Don’t talk like…”

“…With the Judge…Crossing over…I wasn’t prepared…”

“None of us were…”

‘Except for me,’ Xander thought, ‘I could have stopped it all if I had…’

But all the ‘what if’s’ and ‘could’ves’, weren’t going to do her any good.

“Well, some event must have triggered his, uh, transformation. If anyone would know what happened it would be you, Buffy” Xander heard Giles say requesting an answer.

“Well, I don’t!” Buffy said sharply.

“Did anything happen last night?”

Buffy stood shaking head head, “Giles, please I can’t!” Then she ran out of the library.

“Buffy, I’m sorry, but we…”

“Shut up, Giles!” Giles looked at the girl who hadn’t stopped staring out the darkened window.

“Xander, we have no choice…”

“You don’t know anything!” Xander said angrily, “Besides I have a plan to deal with the Judge.”

“And Angelus?”

“If the Slayer can’t do her job, you mean? I’ll figure something out.”” Xander turned, following the Slayer’s example left.

***

“You didn’t kill the Slayer, did you?” Spike asked. Knowing that Angelus hadn’t.

“Of course not.”

Drusilla growled, “You don’t want to kill her, just hurt her. Make her suffer for very slight against you.”

Spike for a moment wasn’t sure if Dru was talking about Angelus and the Slayer, or Xander and himself.

“To kill the Slayer…you have to love her.” Angelus told them.

Spike snorted, “Right.”

Angelus rolled his eyes and sighed put upon, “Isn’t that what you’re doing with Xander?”

Spike looked thoughtful for a moment, “Maybe to a point. You have to see though, this isn’t about killing one girl for me. No, I want to take out that whole sorry lot of would be heroes. Strike at their core to corrupt what is most pure, shatter the _heart,_ if you will. For them, all of them…your Slayer included. The heart is Xander.”

A look of understanding came over Angelus’s features.

“And do you know, what the best part will be?”

Angelus shook his head, while Drusilla giggled madly.

“The look in her eyes when she understands that everything she suffers, all that pain…is her own fault. That she brought it on herself.” Spike paused, as a shark’s grin spread over his face, his voice full of hate as he laughed, “Because she trusts me.”

***

Buffy’s eyes snapped opened. She almost didn’t want to believe what her dream showed her. That someone she trusts so much could or would activily betray her like that. But she found resolve. That… _Bitch_ would pay.

***

Xander leaned against Jenny’s desk, waiting for the bell for class to ring. Xander knew Buffy would come after Jenny like she did in the ‘Before’. When Buffy appeared in the open doorway, it just confirmed what Xander thought. What really amazed Xander was just how angry Buffy looked. Buffy marched towards them; Xander smoothly put herself in front of the computer teacher. Xander found herself caught unawares. Buffy breezed passed Giles, who looked relieved to see his Slayer, and grabbed Xander by the throat. Once Buffy had Xander immobilized she shoved Xander back against Jenny’s desk, pinning Xander to it with all her Slayer strength.

“Buffy!” Giles exclaimed at the unprovoked attack on Xander.

Xander vaguely heard someone ask if they should get the principal, and Jenny dismissing the class. Xander was more worried about trying to breath, _‘What is it and people going for my throat!’_

Xander could only stare up at the upset and hurt hazel eyes of the Slayer.

“You knew!” Buffy hissed.

“How did you _know_ he would change!” Buffy just kept tightening her grip around Xander’s throat. So all Xander could do was make a few wheezing noises in reply to the question.

“Buffy, please…” Giles said, trying to pull the Slayer off the other girl, Buffy shrugged him away.

“You knew, I know you did!”

“If you want an answer, you should let her breathe.” Jenny said soothingly, “I don’t think some one is suppose to be that shade of blue for this long.”

“What Changed Him!” Buffy screamed at Xander.

“Let her go, Buffy!” Giles, having had enough of this, finally roared Buffy.

Buffy gave Xander’s throat one last squeeze and a look that could cut glass. Let her go and stepped back.

Xander sat up on the desk as she inhaled much needed air, coughing and choking, trying to remember how to breathe, “Y-yes, I knew! No, I-I couldn’t tell you. Why, is part of a m-much longer story.” She then sent Buffy a dark glare of her own, “Angel was _cursed_   with a soul. Didn’t you ever stop and wonder what might break it?”

“What does that…”

“Everything Buffy!” Xander snarled, as too many memories of the ‘Before’ pounded into her head at once. Xander turned towards Jenny, “Isn’t that right, Janna of the Kalerdash.”

Jenny Calendar went pale at the name, “How did you…”

“It’s part of that longer story.”

“I didn’t know! I’m sorry,” Jenny said as she turned to Buffy, knowing she couldn’t hide the truth anymore, “Angel was supposed to pay for what he did to my people.”

“And me?” Buffy asked, the anger at Xander momentary distracted, “What was I suppose to be paying for?”

“I didn’t know,” Jenny repeated and pleaded, “what would happen until after I swear, I would have told you!”

“But Xander…knew.” Buffy said slowly, understanding, as she looked at the girl who had been lying to her.

“I did warn you! The whole chastity thing wasn’t just me being weird.”

“Well, it was really vague!” Buffy bit out roughly.

“Ch-chastity thing?” Giles stammered out, not really sure he wanted to know.

Buffy gave him a meaningful look.

“If Angel achieved true happiness even for a moment. The curse would be broken. He’d lose his soul.” Jenny explained.

“Oh,” Giles said, taking off his glasses, it was clear what wasn’t being said.

Xander made a dissatisfied sound, “Yeah, like that was a really well thought out curse, at that.” She shook her head, “I can’t believe your people were ever know for vengeance with such sloppy work. That has to be the stupidest curse in existence for various reasons. If I was going to curse someone, I’d make damn sure that there wasn’t an escape clause!!!”

“Just how do _you_ know all of this?” Giles asked.

Xander sighed; she knew this day would come. She just hadn’t expected it to be so soon.

 ***

Xander had Giles call the others of their group into the library. They sat around one of the tables, because Xander only wanted to explain this once to them. Slowly and carefully she told them about the do-over without telling any of them what had happened to them. When they asked she told them that, if she told them, they would see that their destiny was written in stone and would race toward that end. Or they would question every decision they would make and just drive themselves nuts. It was better not to know she told them. But when Giles asked why the do-over happened, Xander knew she couldn’t lie about it. She also knew she didn’t have to tell him every thing… yet. She still had time for that.

But did tell him, “We fucked-up, G-man. There was an evil so old and so powerful we thought it was the end. People were dying. Things had happened in the year or so before to…well break us, for lack of a better term. And our breaking almost happened. But we Scoobies are strong. We rallied and fought back. In our defense we were pressed for time and couldn’t devote enough of it to the much- needed research we should have done. The spell we cast…we had no idea the sheer scope of it. If we had I don’t think we would have done it. But it was the only choice we could see at the time. With that one spell, we threw the balance of good and evil out of whack. The Higher Powers don’t like it when you do that.”

It was Cordelia who asked the hard questions in her ever bunt ways, “So why didn’t you tell us about Angel’s lost of soul,” She paused, “and why on earth would these ‘powers’ make you a girl?”

“To answer your last question first, the PTB like to see me suffer.” Xander bemoaned then went on to say, “It has to do with the balance. There are some things I _can_ change. Some I _can’t._ Angel’s lose of soul is one of the things I couldn’t change. And I did try to tell Buffy about what would happen. But every time I did I would choke on my words. Something’s no matter how unfair _must_ happen for they are a part of a bigger plan….That’s not to say it’s a good plan. A lot of the things that can be changed involve choices. Ones we made, the path not taken…and the worst was when we choose not to act. So much pain because of the wrong choice or one made in the heat of the moment.”

Buffy flinched at that.

“But we survived the evil, right?” Jonathan asked.

Xander had to look away, “Some of us did,” was said in a sad voice.

“Johnny, Oz, and I weren’t a part of the group last time, were we?” Amy asked astutely.

“No, you and Jono, weren’t.”

“Angel!” Buffy demanded. Xander had to admit she had shown a lot of patenients.

“Still lost his soul for the same reasons.”

Buffy turned to Jenny, who was leaning on the bookshelf closest to Buffy, “Your people cursed him?” She paused as Jenny nodded, “So re-curse him.”

“No. I-I can’t. Those magicks are lost even to my own people.” Jenny tried to tell Buffy.

The Slayer didn’t want to hear that, “You did it once, it might not be to late to save him!”

“I don’t know how. I can’t help you.”

“Then take me to someone who can!” Buffy exclaimed.

Jenny nodded.

“Buffy…” Xander said as she came up to the Slayer, not expecting the punch Buffy threw at her. Hit Xander in the jaw and with enough force to knock her to the floor. Xander sat on the ground, her long hair obscuring her dark expression from Buffy, just nodded once. Jenny told Buffy that her uncle might know of a way to save Angel and that they should go see him.

When they had left, Willow asked Xander, “Are you alright?”

Standing up, Xander wiped away the blood at the corner of her mouth, “I deserved that. More so than Buffy knows,” She muttered mostly to herself. “Nice left cross, she has. A bit harder and she would have broken my jaw.”

“I think that was the point.” Cordelia said throwing in her two cents worth.

“Xander, you said you had a plan?” Giles asked changing the subject, not very smoothly though.

Xander nodded, “I’ll need Oz and Jono, to come with me to get something. But yeah I got a plan.”

***

Buffy and Jenny entered the motel room; they saw the body of the older dead man, who had obviously been tortured before he was killed.

“Uncle!” Jenny cried.

Buffy turned away from the other woman’s grief and saw on the nearest wall, written in the dead man’s blood, “Well, lover…Was it good for you?”

***

When Xander and the other two boys, carrying a military issue green crate, returned to the library they went straight to Giles office. Xander heard Buffy tell Jenny to, “Get out.”

Jenny looking lost and a little numb left without saying a word.

“What’s this?” Buffy asked as the boys put the crate on Giles’s desk.

“Your birthday present,” Xander said as she leaned in the doorway. Oz undid the latches to the crate and Jonathan opened the box. “Hope you like the color.”

“You wouldn’t believe what Xan has in her shed.” Jonathan said with wide eyes.

“Lot of stuff there.” Oz stated.

“Xander, you can’t bring me a weapon of mass destruction and think we’re okay.” Buffy said but the warm look in her eyes as she looked at the weapon belied the cold tone of voice.

“We still don’t know where they’ll go.” Giles said.

“A demon that can burn the humanity out of people, hmmm…” Buffy wondered.

“Not a lot of people are going to line up for that.” Jonathan said.

“Uh, guys,” Oz said with a look of pure inspiration, “I know where I would go.”

“Only one place really,” Xander said at the same time as Oz, they exchanged a look then both said, _““The Mall.””_

 ***

The people who were at the SunnyDale Mall that night would speak of what happened in terrified whispers for decades to come. Those who _would_ even speak of it anyway…

The Judge and three Master Vampires stood on top of the stairs. The big blue demon reached out a hand. An arc of energy flew from his hand to a man who was walking by. The man froze, a look of bewilderment crossed his face then fear, and he quickly began to smoke then disappeared in a burst of red, hot flames.

“Lock the doors, boys.” Angelus ordered, the minions. Drusilla giggled happily while Spike looked on the events in boredom.

***

The elevator doors opened. Xander was carrying two crossbows. Buffy came striding out behind Xander, Oz and Jonathan were carrying a dark green crate on their shoulders. Giles and the other three girls of the group followed.

“Everybody keep back.” Buffy told them.

“Yeah, damage control only.” Xander said, “Take out any of the lesser vamps if you can, no grandstanding.”

“Xander and I will handle the Smurf, Angelus and the others.” Buffy ordered, then noticed Xander’s incredulous look. “I’m still mad at you, and I won’t talk to you for a while after this…But, I want you at my back.”

“To Hell and back,” Xander said softly.

Buffy only smiled slightly at that.

***

The Judge continued to burn people at an amazing rate.

“Oh, goody,” Drusilla said with a bounce, Spike gave her a wondering look. Didn’t she know that once the Judge was done with the humans he would turn on them? The arc of energy, which had been providing the light show for Drusilla’s amusement, came to a sudden halt. A crossbow bolt, to the judge’s chest was the reason why…

Spike was barely able to dodge a second bolt that had flown too close for his comfort.

“Who dares!” Exclaimed the Judge as he yanked the bolt out of his chest.

The three vampire saw that across the Mall’s food court, on top of one of the refreshment stands, stood the Slayer and at her side was the Hyena, both of them held crossbows.

Buffy handed her crossbow to Xander and she tossed both of them to Jonathan as Buffy said, “I think that got their attention.”

Oz opened the dark green crate that was nearby, as the Judge said, “Fools! No weapon forged by man can stop me!” Oz hands the weapon to Xander, “Well,” she said handing the anti-tank rocket launcher to Buffy, “That was then…”

Buffy settled the rocket launcher on her shoulder, “This is now…” she powers it on.

The vampires exchange glances, they knew when shit was about to hit he fan and how to avoid it. Spike grabbed Drusilla and pulled her away from the Judge.

The Scoobies took cover behind the snack counter. Xander knelt down on the refreshment stand and braced Buffy. Knowing that the aftershock of the launcher going off almost caused her to fall of the stand in the ‘Before’.

Buffy set the sights and opened the trigger guard.

“What’s that do?” The Judge asked with childlike curiosity.

Spike and Drusilla leaped over the stair railing, Angelus followed just as Buffy pulled the trigger to the launcher. The rocket flew true, it hitting the Judge square in the chest causing him to explode in smoke and flame, much like his victims had.

Angelus was the first to recover from the explosion, and took off running. Drusilla frighten and confused by the loud noise and smoke screams and ran off in the opposite direction of Angelus. Spike sat on the floor rubbing his head, he had it hit when he had landed on the floor after leaping over the stair railing, and was completely undecided on whom to follow…

***

Buffy handed the rocket launcher to Oz then looked at Xander, “Best present ever!”

“I knew you’d like it.”

“But couldn’t you’ve gotten it in pink? It * so * doesn’t match this outfit.”

Xander only rolled her eyes.

“Do you think he’s dead?” Willow asked referring to the Judge.

Buffy shrugged, “We can’t be sure.”

“So just pick up the pieces and keep them separated.” Xander told her.

Angelus was angry that this scheme hadn’t worked, and that the Slayer had found the resolve to face them. He had been so sure…He made sure Buffy saw him as he escaped. Angelus wanted her to follow him and Buffy being Buffy did just that.

***

“Buffy, where are you…” Xander started as the Slayer jumped down from the refreshment stand and took off running, Xander followed after her but still heard Cordelia exclaim, “Pieces! We get the pieces. Our job sucks!”

***

Spike was still sitting on the floor he’d lit a cigarette but it got put out when the sprinkler system kicked on, so now he was wet while watching the ensuing chaos, as the humans ran around panicked.

When Xander came tearing after the Slayer who was following Angelus, it reminded him of a bad comedy sequence. Spike sighed and stood up, “Right then.”

***

_Gods, I hate getting wet_ , Xander thought as she pushed wet hair out of her face, as she followed Buffy. She found the Slayer and Angelus battling it out. When Xander heard Angelus say, “…And the worst part was…pretending to love you!”

Xander could see that what he said threw the Slayer off her game, and she was not giving it her all.

“Are you going to take that?” Xander asked, the other two paused and looked at her. She took a few steps closer to them, “Are you going to let him walk away?” Xander eyed Angelus warily as he began to smirk at Buffy’s lost look.

“You should listen to Xander,” Angelus fairly purred to Buffy, “After all a predator always knows its prey.”

“That’s not what I meant, you bastard!” Xander snapped, letting her temper get the better of her, she pulled a stake from her jacket then lunged at Angelus.

Angelus’s eyes widened, knowing he wouldn’t be able to avoid Xander’s attack and not to sure he could actually take the girl in a fight, started to back away. Buffy just seemed to confused to stop Xander. When suddenly a bleached blonde, black leather clad blur slammed into the dark haired girl. The force of the blonde’s momentum knocked both of them down the nearby stairs.

Angelus and Buffy watched as Xander and Spike tumbled down them, fighting over the stake in Xander’s hand as they went. Confident in his grand-childe, Angelus turned back to the Slayer. Seeing her distraction, he hit her from behind causing Buffy to fall over hitting the ground hard.

“If I’d known how easy you were I never would have bothered with you. I would have went after a real challenge…say like, Xander…”

***

When they had landed at the bottom of the stairs Xander rolled in a move that left Spike pinned to the floor in a familiar position, as Xander straddled his waist with the stake inches from his heart.

“So…this is how you’ll _prove_ , “ Xander sneered the word, “yourself to me? Standing at Angelus side even knowing what will happen?”

“Xander think – you know as much as I hate to admit it, he is needed in the future. The only chance we had was prevention and we couldn’t all there is now is damage control!” Spike gasped out.

***

Buffy rolled to her feet glaring at the thing wearing her lover’s face, “That doesn’t work. I know you’re not Angel.”

***

Xander stared deep into Spike’s blue eyes… Some part of her knew what he said was true but was to hurt by his betrayal to see clearly. After all if anyone hated Angelus more than Xander, it was Spike. Anger…it consumed her…At the Powers That Be…Buffy and Angel…Jenny Calendar…at herself for almost believing…“Your right I never should have let it get this far…”

Spike sighed in relief at her words but noticed that she hadn’t removed the stake from where it was near his heart along with the dark look in Xander’s eyes. A look he had received after having an axe thrown at his head.

“You! You’re the cause!”

Xander sounded even more irrational as she continued, “You brought this about. It never would have happened if you and your mad princess hadn’t stepped foot in SunnyDale! I should have staked you the moment you arrived. You never should have had a chance to set this all into motion!”

***

“You’d like to think that. But it doesn’t matter. The important thing is…You’re the one who made me the man I am now…”

Buffy had, had enough of that smirk as she kicked Angelus in the face.

***

Spike got mad, and stopped worrying about hurting Xander as he flipped them over and was now pinning Xander to the floor. He leaned down and hissed harshly, “Me? Set this in motion? You’ve gone dafter than my dear Dru, you have. If you recall I wasn’t gifted with these memories of mine until after _your_ mystical sex-change!”

Xander bucked against his hold but he quelled her and continued, “So, if you want anyone to blame, to be the ‘cause’ I don’t think you have to look any farther than a mirror.”

Xander growled, making Spike remembered the stake she was still pressing against his heart. Grabbing her wrist her twisted it until them both heard it crack, causing Xander to scream in pain.

***

Oz liked being included in his boyfriend and girlfriend’s…hobby. He just hadn’t thought it would be so…grody, “Uh…” he pointed down to the ground, “Arm!”

***

“Don’t tell me you’re quitting already?” Angleus smirked down at Buffy who was on the floor again. “Come on Lover, you know you want it…”

Buffy leaped up off the floor, hitting him in the face.

***

Spike wasn’t sure if the look he saw in Xander’s eyes was the return of sanity but he could, staring into her eyes as he was, see it change from the soul deep kind of pain to the more immediately physical kind of pain. They were now shined with unshed tears briefly, but then she shut them. When Xander opened her eyes, she was almost the Xander he talked to across the window ledge. Except for that look of betrayal in them.

***

Buffy pulled out a stake and stood ready to finish it. When Angelus laughed, “You can’t do it. You can’t kill me.”

***

Spike eyed Xander warily as he backed off; her eyes still carried a hint of that dark rage. “All set to get back into the fray?”

Xander said nothing as she stood up, walked passed him and up the stairs. When she reached the top, she looked over her shoulder at him…

***

Buffy didn’t move, then her anger took over and she kicked Angelus in the crotch with all her strength. Angelus grabbed his groin, moaning in pain as he collapsed to the ground. Buffy turned her back on him and walked away…

***

Buffy walked over to Xander and they exchanged a long look. Both saw the almost matching looks of betrayal in the others eyes…

Looking over the Slayer’s shoulder, Xander saw Angelus on all fours groaning in pain. Buffy glanced down the stairs to see the crestfallen expression on Spike’s face. Without a word the girl’s turned toward the nearest exit. When they were in the parking lot making their way to Giles’s car and Oz’s van, Buffy noticed that Xander was holding her wrist.

“Are you hurt?” Buffy asked.

Softly Xander said, “H-he broke my…” In all the confrontations Xander had with Spike the vampire had never truly hurt her. Oh, they sparred and fought. The hits landed hurt but they had never done any lasting damage to the other. Even the fight in the church was more of a dance. The organ falling on her had done more to hurt her than Spike actually had, so why did a simple broken wrist hurt so much?

“What?” Buffy asked, unsure if she had heard right.

Xander repeated louder, “He broke my…wrist.”

Buffy was sure the word Xander had said had meant had not been ‘wrist’.

***

As Xander walked away from him, Spike wondered why that look in her eyes haunted him and what worried him more was that it had been a look all the women in his unlife shared. Spike had seen his death in her eyes.

Ceily had been his social death. Drusilla was his physical one. Buffy, oddly enough caused the death of his idealisms.

What death would Xander cause for him?

***

Spike reached the top of the stairs he looked down at his grand-sire, who was sitting on the floor, still recovering from the Slayer’s parting shot.

“I’m guessing the girl is not as impressed with you, as you still thought she’d be, was she mate?”

Angelus groaned, “Didn’t sound like you were doing much better.” Slowly, gingerly he stood up, “At least I know Buffy loves me. Too bad you can’t say the same about Xander, isn’t it?”

Spike glared, “Tch – trying to play nice with that girl just isn’t in the cards if her dander is up. Anyway – just what are you playing at?”

“Oh, you know me Spike, I love the classics. Just going to add a few twists is all.”

“You never did stop with the twisting.”

“It’s no fun without them, you know that.” Angelus mock pouted, “Trust me, Spike. Our girls have no idea what’s in store for them.”

“Oh, one of them has…” Spike muttered, as Angelus threw a companionable arm around his shoulders.

***

Xander heard the others talking around the table they normally researched at as she seemingly wandered through the stacks aimlessly. Until she came to the darkest, dustiest corner of the library she dropped to her knees and walked her fingers along the spines of the books on the bottom shelve. She pulled out a book and flipped through the pages until she found what she wanted.

***

Xander was sitting on the couch watching MTV, surprised that they still actually played music videos. Sara Maclahnon’s ‘ _Possession_ ’ came on just as the knock came at the door. Holding her hurting wrist she went to open it. Thinking that her mother had forgotten her keys. It wouldn’t have been the first time that happened.

~ _The night is my companion_ …~

Spike stood on the other side.

“What are you doing here?” Xander glared unhappily at him.

“I- I wanted to see you.”

“Well, I don’t want to see you!” She hissed at him. “Do you know how it felt to hear you say those things, to see you standing with them, knowing you could have staked Angelus at any time?!” She ranted at him. “You broke my wrist,” Xander muttered lastly at Spike.

“You were going to dust me, pet. I could see it in your eyes at the time – so I think I might be forgiven the wrist.”

~ _And not be satifistied_ …~

“Conversation over!” Xander snarled.

“I didn’t do it cause I wanted too. You know this! Bloody Hell, Xan I know you’re a decent strategist. Angelus is older and stronger than me. He knows too much about us or thinks he does anyway. I had to prove myself to him or I would have met a dusty fate. So I gave the whole making nice to betray you…”

“That’s just what you did!”

~ _And I would be the one_ …~

What could Spike say to that. He had betrayed her; he had even enjoyed it while he was doing it. And the temptation to see that pain in her eyes, to feel the pain roll off her in waves had won out if only for a few little while. He was evil after all.

“I wouldn’t have lasted a single hour of Angelus’s return if I hadn’t. As it is he thinks he can use me.”

 ~ _Oh, you speak to me in riddles_ …~

For a moment Spike thought he saw her soften toward him. “Come on Xander, you have to…” he tried to walk through the doorway but crashed into an invisible barrier and bounced off it.

“What? Trust you?” Xander’s voice was thick with emotion, “Well…I don’t.”

Then in an echo of the ‘Before’ that, Spike remember all to clearly, the door slammed in his face.

~Your words alone kept me alive…~

Spike rammed his fist into the door, “Xander! Xander, you have to understand…” He leaned his forehead against the door, “You have to believe…” he whispered pleadingly, but stopped and straighten rallying himself before the word _‘please’_ could come out of his mouth. If this was how it was going to be the he, “I won’t beg.” Spike glared at the door, no he wouldn’t do that. He had done too much of that in the ‘Before’…or at least his counter part had and it hadn’t got ‘him’ anywhere. Slowly he backed away from the door and off the porch.

“Fine I can do this. I can be the monster you so see me as. Easily too!” Spike snarled as he made his way down the lawn, he stopped and turn back one last time…. “I DON’T _NEED_ YOU!” Spike shouted, “You hear that.” He turned and continued on his way, “I _don’t_ need you…I don’t…I don’t…”

***

Xander after closing the door leaned against it and slide to the floor. With her sharper hearing she could hear every word Spike said. Holding her throbbing wrist to her chest muttered, “I don’t _need_ you, either Spike! I don’t…I don’t…I _don’t…_ I **_DON’T!”_** Not realizing when she began to sob out the words.

~ _The path I fear to tread_ …~

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. A Bitchingly Passionate Phase pt.1

After all the excitement with the Judge was over and dealt with, Giles had called in some favors and the Judge was re-scattered all over the world. So, the fall out of Angel, one of their inner-circle going bad was dealt with for the most part. The group hoped for a lull in the action on home- sweet- Hellmouth.  They needed it, a chance to breath, to regroup and regain some of their strength and mental balance. But it just didn't happen. Some kind of demon dog started a rampage through SunnyDale that they figured out soon enough was a werewolf because a werewolf hunter showed up- which disappointed Xander, since the hunter in question didn't look anything like Hugh Jackman. Oz, it turned out, was the werewolf terrorizing SunnyDale. Xander barely remembered that it was a bite from his cousin that did it. Actually, it was when Jonathan and Amy came racing into the library that made Xander remember. Apparently Oz came from a long line of werewolves, but it was only activated when they were bitten by an actively infected family member. Unfortunately, Xander hadn't remembered in time to warn Oz about it.

Buffy wasn't speaking to Xander, no surprise there. Xander had only hoped Buffy would be a bit more mature about things. She wasn't. Patrols were a silent affair nowadays. Then Angelus had turned Theresa...and a minion demon that had just risen almost killed Buffy. Would have for sure, if it hadn't been for Xander. When Xander told Buffy not to blame herself Buffy had replied with, " _No, I blame you_!"

Well, what more could Xander say to that? Xander only gave Buffy a sad look and shook her head before leaving. If she had stayed Xander would have said something she would have regretted. Something to the effect of, _'Well maybe if Buffy had been a good girl and kept her legs crossed, none of this would ever have happened.'_

Then Valentines Day rolled around and Xander had to admit that it was probably the best one ever. There were no love spells; no one got turned into a rat. Cordelia this time around had stepped up and laid down the law to Harmony, after her little almost coup, with the other sheep about who was Queen. Oz was still adjusting to being a wolf, but he had Jonathan and Amy who were so very understanding, and besides that thought having a werewolf for a boyfriend was 'so cool'. Although Xander could have done without the trauma that was her _mother's_ idea of romance. Xander still shuddered when she remembered about the sounds she had heard come from her mother's bedroom that night.

Xander's nightmares, they weren't so cool in this otherwise better rerun of a craptastic night. Although Xander would never be able to look at that beautiful, old fashioned, ornate, real ruby, (because Cordelia wouldn't stop going on, and on about that) necklace, she had gotten from a not-so-mysterious admirer, and not think about how it could be used as a garrote while a silky voice purred into her ear, "The choice is yours...beware of desire..."

***

Xander walked down the school hallway arm in arm with Buffy laughing. Things were much better between them now.

"I have to stop at my locker." Xander told Buffy, they paused by the lockers as Xander opened hers. A white envelope fell out of the locker and floated to the ground. Both girls stared at it, and then finally Buffy reached down and picked it up. On the front of it was Xander's name in elegant script. Xander took it from the other girl and opened it, pulling out a sheet of paper. The letter on the page was written in the same handwriting, she began to read...

**One Week Before...**

_' **Passion**..._ '

Xander was trying to lose herself in the music that was playing at the Bronze. On the dance floor she let it soothe her, distract her. Xander knew Buffy was nearby dancing. Jonathan, Amy and Oz also danced near them. Cordelia and Willow sat at a corner table chatting and cuddling each other.

Spike wove his way though the crowded club always keeping his prey in sight, he watched as the dark haired girl lost herself in the moment to the music. Dancing a bit away from the Slayer and the others, but always keeping them in her sight. Spike saw the Slayer purposely turn her back on Xander whenever the other girl came into her line of sight.

Spike idly puzzled what caused this break between the girls. But only for a moment, too soon he was caught up in watching his girl sway, arms above her head, hips rolling in unintentionally seductive movements. 

His girl? Spike wondered just when he had become so possessive of Xander. More than likely it was about the time Angelus made his turn, or at least that's what he tried to convince himself of.

Soon the true fun would begin.

' ** _...it's born, lying in all of us...Sleeping...waiting..._** '

Buffy was walking arm in arm with Willow, and Cordelia had her arm hooked though Willow's other arm. They were giggling and laughing. The trio of Oz, Amy and Jonathan walked a bit behind the girls, and they were talking softly to each other. Xander, all alone, followed behind them as they left the club. None of them gave the couple in the corner kissing a second look. They should have.

Angelus lifted his head from his latest meal, and saw the group of 'white hats', as Spike called them, wandering away. He carelessly dropped the now dead body of the woman he had been feeding on to the ground. He was surprised that neither the Slayer, nor Xander, had sensed him. Angelus morphed back into his human face as the blond vampire joined him.

"You were right."

"You sound so shocked, mate."

"Well, it isn't often that it happens."

Spike just glared at Angelus, not replying as he began to follow after the group of teenagers.

' ** _...And though unwelcome, unwanted...unbidden...it will stir...'_**

Spike in game face, sat by the closed window, and lightly ran his now sharper nails against the glass knowing it would not be opened to him. He was barred by both mystical, and mundane, means. His girl was a cautious one.

**_'Open its jaws, and howl...'_ **

Xander sat up in bed, pushing the sleepy longhaired blue kitten off of her as she did, knowing she would get no more rest after this latest nightmare. She got out of bed and walked over to her window. Pushing the curtain aside, she looked out.

Darkness...not even the stars shone this night.

From the corner of her eye she saw a tiny red glow; it was by the tree in her yard. Frowning, she enhanced her vision a bit her eyes glowed green. All too clearly she saw the one thing she hadn't wanted to see.

Spike, leaned back against the tree, smoking and staring straight at her window. She watched as he went into game face and smirked at her...Xander dropped the curtain. Shakily she made her way back to her bed, got under the covers, pulling them up to her chin. The kitten curled close, purring in its sleep. Xander stared at her ceiling unseeingly until her alarm clock went off.

_**'It festers...it bleeds...'** _

Xander fought the fledge, it was young, so much so that Xander could still smell it's human death on it. The fledge was male, lean and had light blond hair. Xander had him pinned to the ground and was hitting him, over and over again. He was bleeding, bruised, and begging for mercy...but she just kept hitting him.

_**'Passion...It speaks to us...Guides us...'** _

Spike blinked in bewilderment at the now closed door, his conversation with Jessica Harris had been enlighting on many levels. Xander it seemed hadn't shared the reasons to just why Spike was on the outs with her. And when Jessica had asked him the whys, he had just replied with, "It's complicated."

To say Jessica was less than impressed with this answer was an understatement, and so he got a frown along with the door closed in his face. Strangely though that didn't bother him all that much. No, what really worried him was, why he now noticed the light scent of vengeance magic surrounding Jessica Harris like a perfume.

_**'Passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have...'** _

Xander answered the door at the second knock. Buffy stood on the other side looking uncomfortable.

"Hi."

"Hey, um...I wanted to walk to school with you. Giles said we should talk."

Xander rolled her eyes, "Well if G-man said-so. Let me get my stuff."

Buffy was trying to figure out where to start the conversation she knew they needed to have, when Xander stopped by a tree in her yard and squatted down to look at something on the ground. Buffy glanced over Xander's shoulder at the pile of cigarette butts that held the dark haired girl's attention.

"Ew, hasn't anyone heard of an ashtray?" Buffy asked her nose wrinkled in disgust.

Xander reached out and picked one up, rolling it between her thumb and forefinger as she told Buffy, "They're all the same."

"What?"

Xander swallowed hard, "They're all the same brand."

"How can you tell?"

"Scent. Plus the little logo on the filter."

"Oh, why are they important?"

"They aren't...to you. I've made a mistake..." Xander whispered.

Buffy frowned as Xander just stared off in to the distance.

"One I'm not sure I can..." Xander shook her head dropping the butt, "Spike..."

Buffy looked back down at the cigarette butts, then looked around and saw that you could see Xander's bedroom window cross from this spot. "This is about Spike?"

Xander sighed, "You're not the only one with a stalker, and I've had mine longer too."

"Huh?"

"Buffy, do you know why I didn't stake Spike the moment he blew into town?"

"No."

"Because I thought he _deserved_ better..."

"Ok, repeating myself cause...huh?" Buffy said confusedly.

"The 'Spike' in the 'Before' was injured...I guess you could call it. He came to us for help and protection and we gave it. To this day I don't know why but we did. I hated Spike almost to the point of obsession. I know every evil act Spike has done. Yet I also know that for every act, there was an act of good or kindness done by him. He'd never admit that though. He's saved us, all of us many times in the 'Before'. He didn't ever have too, not really."

"Still confused." Buffy muttered.

Xander sighed, "Slowly, over time, he became...well, not one of us, but an ally of sorts. I know that _this_ Spike is not the Spike of the 'Before'. No, _this_ Spike is far more dangerous than _that_ Spike ever hoped to be."

"Why?"

"Because this Spike has a lot of the same memories I do of the 'Before.'" Xander told Buffy bluntly.

Buffy was taken back by this, "H-how...?"

"It's about balance, I think. Don't worry he wasn't sent back in time like I was. Some force, the bad side more than likely, gave this Spike the memories of the 'Spike' from the 'Before'. It was a dangerous line I treaded with him and I knew it. I relied too much on Spike's feelings...no, the 'Spike' from the 'Before's' feelings about certain people...I was *so* wrong..." Xander said softly.

Buffy said nothing, but laid a hand on Xander's shoulder, offering what little comfort she was able to. She, of all people could understand some of the pain Xander was feeling, when someone turned so thoroughly against you.

***

Spike growled as he paced, Dru was only being herself. He knew this. But he was getting tired of the way she was trying to play him and Angelus off of each other.

"You must forgive, Spike." He heard her say to the other vampire, "He's just a bit testy tonight. The hyena's jaws have clamped down on him, and now they refuse to let go..."

  
***

Xander leaned against the wall by a row of lockers and bluntly eavesdropped as Buffy said to Jenny, "Look I know you feel bad about what happened..." Buffy paused for a moment then cruelly said, "Keep it up."

Jenny muttered something Xander didn't heard to Buffy before walking away from the Slayer. Xander pushed herself from the wall and walked up behind Buffy, "That's a truly brilliant plan you have there," the Slayer jumped at the sound of Xander's voice. "Pushing away the one person who just might be able to help you."

Buffy rounded on Xander, "I don't like how cryptic you are. Just say what you mean."

"Jenny Calendar, in the 'Before', found a spell that would give you back your boyfriend...but the cost was heavy."

"What happened?"

"She was killed. I don't think I have to tell you by who, do I?" With that parting shot, Xander walked away from the upset Slayer.

***

Xander was having a slow night on patrol when her cell phone rang. She knew it must be important cause none of the others ever called her on it unless it was, like in the 'help a demon is after me' way important.

"Xander's House of Pain, you strip, we whip."

There was a beat then, "Don't hang up, pet!"

"Give me a reason not to."

"Cause as we speak Angelus is going after that gypsy-teacher of yours. He's heading straight for the school. If you run, you'll beat him there."

"I see." Xander said then hung up the phone and returned it to her pocket. She took a deep breath as she began to run.

***

Spike stepped out of shadows as after his girl raced by. He folded his own phone up and returned it to the inside duster pocket.

"You're welcome, pet."

***

"What are you doing here?"

The unexpected question caused Jenny to jump slightly. She sighed in relief when she saw it was Xander who stood in the doorway of the classroom. She smiled and said, "I could ask you the same thing."

Xander shrugged, "Patrol was slow and I got bored." Xander walked over to Jenny's desk and leaned over so she could see the computer screen. Seeing the Romanian text being translated into English by some program on it, she said nonchalantly, "Oh, that."

Twenty minutes later Jenny popped out a yellow unlabeled disk and set it aside with some books and papers. In the mean time the hard copy was printing out. Xander was staring out the window, watching, waiting...

"Xander, I think this will work..." The subject of returning Angel's soul didn't really interest her..."Xander!!!" The terrified tone in Jenny's voice pulled Xander's attention from the window and to the teacher, who in turn was staring at the back of the classroom where Angelus was sitting in one of the desks.

"How did you get in here?" Jenny asked.

"I was invited. The sign out in front of the school... **'Formatia trans sicera edcatorm'** "

"Enter all ye who seek knowledge." Jenny whispered.

"Looks like I'll have to revoke his invite."  Xander growled and quickly moved in front of Jenny's desk, slowly reaching behind her for the stake she had laid on it earlier but her hand encountered something else.

"I-I-I've got good news..."Jenny started somewhat shakily.

"Yeah, I heard you went shopping..." Angelus said darkly as he made his way towards them.

Xander pulled the glowing glass ball from behind her back, "An Orb of Thesulah...it can  summon a person's soul back from the ether...or so they say." She causally began to toss it up and down in her hand, much like one would a baseball. Xander's eyes never left those of the dark vampire, "You know what I hate about these things?" Angelus looked slightly interested at this...Xander quickly heaved it at the vampire's face, who in turn brought his arms up to protect his face. The orb shattered into dust at the force of the impact.

"Xander!!!" Jenny shrieked in shock at the fact Xander had destroyed the orb, the only thing that could save Angel.

"They're so breakable..." Xander told him as she got the stake from the desk, "No soul for you it seems...and strangely though, I am okay with that."

Angelus growled, shifting into his demonic face and attacked Xander, shoving her into the desk, causing some of the books and papers to fall to the floor.

"Run!" Xander told Jenny, who for a moment looked conflicted about what she should do. Xander hit Angelus, causing him to back off her. "Now!" Xander shouted to the other woman who nodded and took off. Angelus didn't seem to notice as all of his attention was on Xander.

"Think you can take me, little girl?" Angelus hissed at her as he grabbed Xander by her hair and jacket suddenly, and slammed her into the blackboard, repeatedly. Xander, dazed, lashed out with the stake she had a death grip on and stabbed Angelus in the thigh. He roared in pain and backed away from her, Xander turned and faced him as he pulled out the stake and tossed it away from them. He growled and said, "Oh, you're so going to hurt..."

***

Jenny ran down the hall, her only thought was to get Buffy. She was almost out of the school when she was grabbed around the waist and a hand covered her mouth.

"Easy Teach," was growled into her ear by an English accent, "Just want a little info...and you're going to give it to me." Jenny was turned bodily around until she faced her attacker, slowly the hand over her mouth was removed, as Spike asked, "Aren't you?"

***

Spike burst though the door to the computer-science room in time to see Xander hit the floor, looking like...well, like she was on the losing end of the fight with Angelus. Who had, at this point, grabbed a desk and was about to hit Xander with it. Spike growled throwing himself at the dark vampire, causing Angelus to drop the desk. It crashed down next to Xander, but didn't hit her.

"What do you think you are doing?" Spike growled after Angelus had flung the blond away from him.

"Oh? I was just about to kill Xander? Why?"

"You _can't_ do that!" Spike told him as if speaking to a child.

"Why not?"

Xander was grateful for Spike's intervention until he said, "If anyone is going to kill the bint, it's going to be me!"

Xander then listened in disbelief as they began to argue over who had the right to kill her first. She decided, since they were standing toe -to-toe and not even paying her the slightest amount of attention to use their distraction to slip away and out the other door of the classroom, but not before she heard Spike say, "I called dibs!!!"

***

Xander walked up the steps of her porch, turned and sat down. Then she pulled out her cell phone and dialed a number...

"Hey, it's Xander, you okay?"

_"Yes, "_ Jenny replied sounding shaken, " _You?"_

"Oh, good. No, no I'm fine. Listen I think it's too dangerous for you here in town. You should leave..."

" _I can, Xander I have to help resoul him. It's the duty of my people!"_

"Angelus was going to kill you!! You have to disappear. The Orb was destroyed let the Slayer do her job."

" _Xander,"_ Jenny chided, " _Spike cornered me."_

"Oh? Really..."

_"He wanted information about the curse."_

"He did, huh? Look once this thing is settled with Angel you can come back. I just don't want to see what happened before, happen again..."

" _Angelus killed me, didn't he?"_

"Yeah, he did. Leave at first light and Jenny, be safe." Xander sighed and hung up her cell phone, stood and went inside her house.

***

The next day when Giles told them that Jenny had left town, Xander pretended to be as surprised as the others were. But from the look Giles gave her, Xander was sure he knew the truth of the matter.

_**'Passion...**_ '

When Xander walked into her bedroom she noticed something strange on her window still...

_**'It is the source of our finest moments...'** _

Buffy knocked on the front door of Xander's house and Xander's mother answered it. She frowned and asked Buffy, "I thought Xander was meeting you for patrol?"

' _ **...the joy of love...the clarity of hate and the ecstasy of grief...'**_

"How dare that bastard! How dare he touch...It could have been...." Xander ranted to herself as she made her way to the warehouse.

***

Buffy looked around Xander's room, "Are you sure she said she was going to meet me?"

"Well, no. Xander had a bag of weapons and just went tearing out of here, I just assumed she was meeting you." Jessica said as she walked over to the half open window and frowned. It was odd, especially since Xander had been kind of mental about the doors and windows staying closed and locked lately.

Buffy noticed a piece of familiar cream-colored paper lying on Xander's bed. She walked over and picked it up, and saw it was a moment caught in time of Xander was sitting on her bed, as a longhaired kitten rolled around tangling itself up in some yarn at her feet, Xander was captured in the drawing laughing at the kitten's antics.

Buffy just closed her eyes as she heard Xander's mother gasp in horror.

****

Spike just passed by the window when a second later something came crashing through it.

***

Buffy ran through town thinking that Xander really was insane and that she was going to get herself killed all over a...

***

"...Kitten. My poor defenseless kitten..." Xander said as the warehouse was slowly being engulfed in flames. Xander stepped out of the shadows. She was carrying a baseball bat and she was angry, very angry. This wasn't going to be about killing Angelus, no. She'd never go for the kill...not when going for pain could be much more satisfying.

"You know, I could take you attacking me, my friends...but to go after my cat? That was just low."

Angelus pulled out a crossbow bolt that Xander had shot him with earlier and threw it aside with a growl as Xander put the end of the bat in the flames that covered the long table catching it on fire. She swung it as Angelus made to attack her and hit him in the face, then again on the back swing.

"I know what you're thinking...all this fuss over a cat, well what can I say...it was given to me by a friend..."

Xander hit him with the bat again. Angelus staggered away and muttered, "Whatever happened to stakes?"

Xander rolled her eyes at him as she began to really whale on Angelus with the bat. Idly she noticed that Spike had grabbed Drusilla before she could jump in, with Spike telling the dark vampiress, "Uh-uh, no going into the ring unless one of them tags you, those are the rules."

"The kitten was won for me...in a poker game. I named it Ante, cute don't you think?" Xander said conversationally as she brought the bat down again.

"Very," Angelus said as he swept Xander's feet out from under her, causing her to drop the bat.  It rolled away as Xander hit the ground as they struggled, Angelus quickly gained the upper hand when he grabbed the girl by her throat and began to squeeze, pinning her to the ground, "You've had your fun. Do you know what time it is now?"

Suddenly he was knocked away from Xander. Angelus found himself dealing with Buffy who sneered, "My fun!"

****

Spike had to drag Drusilla away as she moaned and screamed for her Daddy, while Spike cursed Xander in several different languages,  as they ran away from the burning warehouse.

***

Angelus barely avoided being singed as he escaped the warehouse and the Slayer's wrath. He had used Xander, who had been struggling to breath at the time, as a distraction for Buffy.

_**'Sometimes it hurts more than we can bear...'** _

Buffy stopped pulling Xander once they were a good hundred feet or so from the burning building.  They were both coughing from the smoke and trying to recover their breath when Xander suddenly swung around and slammed her fist into the Slayer's jaw, causing Buffy to spin and hit the pavement.

"Why did you come?" Xander growled out as she glared down at Buffy, "This wasn't your fight!"

Buffy sat up rubbing her throbbing jaw; "You tired to kill Angel over a cat! Are you looking to commit suicide?" Buffy yelled at Xander. Buffy's eyes then began to tear up, "Y-you can't d-do that! I-I-I'm not sure I-I c-c-an do this a-al-lone!" She exclaimed, Xander dropped down next to the now openly sobbing Slayer and pulled the blond into her arms.

"You won't. You won't..." Xander promised as she stroked Buffy's hair.

_**'If we could live without passion, maybe we would know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow...**_ '

Spike sat at a desk in the rooms he had claimed in the mansion. Leave it to Angelus to want to use the place despite Spike's protests. He sighed and pulled out some paper he had lifted from the poof's art supplies. It was nice paper, Spike could admit, he picked up a pen and began to write a note...this one though was different.

***

Xander looked down at the small grave in her yard.

"I've buried far too many that I've cared about..."

**And Now...**

Xander walked arm in arm with Buffy, they paused next to the computer science room long enough to hear Willow say, "...and asked me to fill in...until the new computer teacher arrives..."

They then continued on down the hall as Buffy began to relay the antics of the vampire she had slayed the night before, it had hit on the slayer with very bad pick-up lines.

"I have to stop at my locker." Xander told Buffy as soon as she could stop laughing. Buffy nodded still giggling. Xander open her locker when she got to it. A white envople fell out of it. Both girls stared at the familiar colored paper until Buffy finally sighed and reached down and to pick it up, on the front of it was Xander's name in elegant script. Buffy held it out to Xander, who slowly took it, opened it, and began to read.

  
_**'Like empty rooms shuttered and dark...without passion...we'd truly be dead.** _

_**Yours Auspiciously...'** _


	4. Playing Against The House

**'Dog Player: A person who usually places his bets with the underdog**.'

  
Spike sat on the eave of the roof. He debated whether or not to tap on the glass of Xander's window, but then the decision was taken out of his hands when the window slammed open. Spike found himself with a crossbow aimed right between his eyes.

"Doesn't playing stalker get old?"

"Xander..." Spike whispered.

"Why I shouldn't shoot you!" Xander growled.

"Well, for one, a crossbow bolt between the eyes won't kill me..."

"It would hurt a lot though, I'm thinking."

Spike glared, "Yeah, pet, it would. Is that what you what to hear? That you can hurt me? Xander, I just want to talk..."

"What could we possibly have to talk about?"

"Damn it Xander! _Everything_ I've done lately; I've done for you. Do you know what would have happened if I hadn't made the choices I did?" Spike watched as a frown came to Xander's face, her preoccupation making her drop the crossbow a bit. To which Spike took this as a sign to continue, "Angelus would have killed the Slayer, then he would have destroyed everything in his path to own you."

"And how are you any different?"

"I'm not. Not really. Except that with the memories I have, I _know_ I can't own you, Xander. That no one can. You saw me as the villain. So villainous I was. You wanted to be frightened by me, and so I made you tremble, luv. Your expectations exhaust me. But everything I did, I did to protect you."

Xander placed a hand on the windowsill and leaned towards Spike, "You'd sound more convincing if you hadn't just paraphrased Labyrinth, Blondie."

Spike ran a hand over his face, growling at the girl irately. Thinking that she isn't getting the point he burst out with, "Give me a break here! Do you know what sort of tear the poof as been on since the gypsy bint disappeared...?" Spike trailed off at Xander's triumphant look, "Which of course _you_ know all about, don't you?"

They stared at each other for a moment in silence, at an impasse. One Xander broke with, "What are you really after here? ...Forgiveness?" She asked with a sneer.

For a moment Spike didn't reply, Xander could see the answer on his face and laughed bitterly, "You just don't know when to stop, do you. Gods that's rich! You hurt me, you betray me..." At this Spike opened his mouth to defend himself from her verbal attacks, but Xander breaks over the top with, "But do you know what hurts the most, Spike?"

He shook his head.

"Whatever you say, whatever you come up with to defend everything you've done...that I might _actually_ believe you..." Xander told him. Then sharply she closed the window as quickly as she had opened it earlier. Spike watched the girl through the glass; she dropped the crossbow to the floor and covered her face with her hands. Spike watched Xander a few moments longer, before turning and jumping off the roof.

"Believe in me..." Spike whispered.

***

In the plane of the higher realms, Dawn Summers paced back and forth. She did not like the turning of events she has seen. Having to see Angel and Buffy have sex just about made her gag. It was her sister for crying out loud! There are just some things Dawn really didn't need to know about Buffy. How Buffy looked when she was having sex was just one of them. Xander and Spike's growing relationship had been a great enjoyment to watch. Dawn always knew there had been way too much unresolved sexual tension between the two in the 'Before'. But then again Dawn could just be a bit biased, after all, both men had been her first crushes. To see them together was just a dream come true...even if one of them happened to be a girl now, and a hot girl at that. Watching the slow build to friendship and to see the growing heat between them was just really...hot.

Dawn shook her head, some times she wondered if all the SunnyDalers were bisexual as a result of Hellmouth exposure...Even Buffy had ended up having a fling with one of the new slayers...before she lost what was left of her sense and took up with the Immortal.

"Ancient One?"

Dawn turned to see a white robed figure coming toward her out of the strange mist Dawn was sure kept her from leaving this realm. She could tell by the figure's body language that it was the same being who helped her get to Xander when the nightmares were running around SunnyDale. This one would often come and watch the events in the Dale with her and would throw popcorn with her at the portal-like movie screen that would show said events.

"Yes?"

"You..." there was a pause then, "Would you like to see more of this realm?"

Dawn blinked, in all the months she had been here that was the first time that offer had been made. Because she was sure whatever powers brought her here wanted to keep her right where she was. It made her suspicious immediately. "Why?"

"I thought..."

"Is this about what's happening in the Dale?"

White Robe sighed, "You always were too smart for your own good."

Dawn frowned at the familiar tone the figure had used. He hadn't done that before, it made her think and glance over to the portal screen that showed SunnyDale twenty-four seven, "So much has changed..."

"Yes, it has. Ancient One, you must trust me when I say you don't want to watch what's coming. There will be nothing you can do..."

"And what will be coming?"

"The Xan-man will be in for some serious pain."

His choice of words implied that he knew Xander and well at that if he used that old nickname. "You know Xander, don't you?"

"Yes."

"How?"

The figure pushed off his hood, revealing a tall lanky dark haired and eyed teenager no older than Dawn herself, "My name was once Jesse McNally..."

Dawn had seen pictures of the boy, had hear some of the stories Xander and Willow would tell every once in a while.

"...But, you Dawn..."

She froze it was the first time anyone had referred to her as anything other than Ancient One. The lanky body and face suddenly morphed, the boy in front of her was still tall but no longer lanky, but now almost had the build of a football player. Messy dark almost black hair, eyes that were a blue-green hue that reminded Dawn of the sea at KingsMen Bluff on a sunny day. They were eyes she had missed looking into in her long months here in this realm, hair she missed running her fingers through, and a beloved voice she missed hearing...

Dawn threw herself into the boy's arms and whispered against his neck, "I've so missed you... _Connor."_

_***_

Now in another part of this same higher realm three beings watched the reunion of the Ancient One and the Destroyer.

"How sappy," as her long white dress rustled, the being known as the First Evil of Mankind pushed blond hair from 'her' eyes.

There came a snicker from a man wearing a black robe, "Don't have any sense of romance, do you Firsty?"

The First snarled at 'her' companion, "What do you think!"

Shadow leaned over next to Jasmine. The dark skinned woman wearing a flowing purple dress, who was destined according to her at least to bring about world peace, and told her,  "You know I don't think, Firsty does, at that."

Jasmine smiled serenely at them, "You should know 'she' doesn't. " She sighed, "My plans are coming unraveled as we speak. Cordelia Chase was _not_ supposed to fall in love with the Red witch. I'll have to find a new host- mother. It won't be easy. Centuries of planning wasted!"

The First turned to the Jasmine, "Not all is lost, my dear. After all, the Ancient One will soon be in a mortal body..."

The Bringer of Peace frowned that had not occurred to her, "What do you think, Shadow?" She asked the third being, who turned to watch the embracing couple on the portal-screen not answering her.

  
***

Dawn had listened to Connor as he explained that Jesse McNally had been reborn as himself in the 'Before'. It was a kind of poetic justice that a person Darla had killed was reborn as her son. When Dawn asked how any of this was possible, Connor had just shrugged and said, "I don't know, but what I do know is...you are my destiny, Dawn."

***

All of the Higher Powers knew that there had been a do-over. The circumstances to why were varied and many depending on whom you asked. The First had all of 'her' memories up until the Slayer had killed her corporal body. So one could say 'she' had a bit of a vendetta against the Slayer and her two vampire lovers. All three of them in their own ways had ruined all 'her' plans. Them and all of their little friends... The First glared at Shadow when he remained quiet at the Bringer of Peace's question. Shadow was taking his sweet time in answering the question that had been put to him and the First was getting more than a bit ticked off. 'She' didn't like the fellow to start with his attitude and insolence towards them only made it worse. Of course the face he 'wore' and his total lack of respect didn't endear him to 'her' either.

"Well answer her, Shadow!" The First growled at him when it looked like he wasn't about to stir.

Shadow pushed back the enveloping hood hiding his sharp features and with the darkly familiar smirk that some would say was his trademark, William the Bloody said, "It would be a shame to break-up such a cute couple."

Jasmine considered what the temporally displaced version of the vampire said, as she exchanged a look with the First Evil, and then turned to look at the portal-screen with growing glee, "It would, wouldn't it."

The First Evil snickered, "Oh, now this going to be evil."


	5. Only You

_'The things people are driven to because of love, even after death are surprising_.' Xander thought as she walked into the Bronze after patrol.

Just in time to face the college crowd. She frowned, after being bumped into by young guy with short wheat-colored blond hair and watched as he continued on his way to join a group of other guys at the corner table. Xander shook her head as she saw Spike at the pool tables fleecing some of the college students out of their parent's money. Spike took a drink from the long necked beer bottle he was holding. Xander had come to the realization that Spike had been right, well, in his own opinion anyway. He had kept Angelus away from her. And she knew that in Spike's own way he had been trying to keep her safe. He had asked for forgiveness...and really, he hadn't done anything that couldn't be forgiven. Seeing Spike as the bad guy was easy for her and something she really had to rein in if she was going to get Spike's help. Acathla was about to be found Xander knew. She watched from the shadows until after Spike had won the game and was counting his ill-gotten gains.

When she approached him, Spike glanced up, and he could tell by the look on her face something was wrong. He asked, "Pet?"

"Don't..." Xander whispered, she swallowed hard then asked, "Just...dance with me?"

Spike frowned but followed her out onto the dance floor. Xander, caught him off guard, when she put her arms around his neck and pressed her body to his, this was completely different from the last dance they had shared. Last time it had been almost formal enough to be acceptable in the time when he had been alive. This was like Xander wanted to be cuddled and comforted to the sway of the music. Spike wasn't objecting. He just had no clue as to why, and he didn't like being in the dark - well, metaphorically speaking anyway, when it came to his girl.

Angelus stood on the catwalk, looking down over the club. You could see the entire thing from this vantage point, it was why he'd choose it to people watch. The remains of his latest meal sat in the corner, artistically arranged so that it would be hours before anyone noticed she was dead. Angelus snickered softly to himself over it.

"So, you want to tell me what's wrong?" Spike asked after two dances of just holding her. Xander had her head resting on his shoulder. A low lazy, jazzy beat played in the background as the singer crooned out the lyrics to the song, it was only now Xander paid them any attention.

~ _My love must be a kind of blind love...I can't see anyone but you_...~

Xander only grunted wordlessly.

"So eloquent, you are." Spike said with a teasing smile flickering just around the edges of his mouth. Xander lifted her head and glared at him for a second or two before dropping it back down on his shoulder.

~ _Are the stars out tonight_...~

Angelus hissed as he recognized the song. It was the damned theme for the two ghosts that had possessed him and the Slayer the night before.

_'Love how_ ,' Angelus thought with the beginnings of a snarl when something on the dance floor caught his gaze.

"I'll take your grunt and non-answer has something to do with my dear grand-sire."

"Angel is a putz." Xander muttered into Spike's shoulder.

Spike blinked and nodded, "Well that's a given, luv. Though whatever happened last night...it got the poof really worked up."

"A pair of ghosts used our own pair of star-crossed idiots to work out their issues."

Angelus growled when he saw how wrapped around each other Spike and Xander were.

"It just made me think is all...about the past, about now."

"About what?"

"Love and the futility of trying to have a relationship on the Hellmouth. Crap that's something I should already know."

"It's not futile," Spike whispered gently, "a bit more difficult, even complicated perhaps, but not impossible..."

Xander raised her head and gave him a skeptical look as she said, "Yeah?"

Angelus looked on in growing rage, _'He's been lying to me!'_

For the expression on Spike's face gave it all away. Spike was, Angelus knew, absolutely, completely, utterly without a doubt whether Spike knew it or admitted it, devoted to the girl in his arms.

~ _But they all disappeared from view_...~

Spike leaned forward and kissed Xander sweetly with just enough passion to make things warm. "See?"

Xander pulled away not as shocked by his actions as she should have been, this was Spike after all. "So, is this where you declare your undying love for me? Because I think we both know I wouldn't believe you."

"Well any love I declared would be undying -vampire, immortal after all."

Xander groaned and dropped her head back to his shoulder, "No jokes," she whispered.

Angelus smirked as he walked down the catwalk and past unnoticed by Spike and Xander.

_'Won't this be interesting. Oh, you both will just *love* what I have in store for you_...' He glanced once more at the two who were so lost in each other then Angelus walked out of the club singing softly to himself, "And I...only have... eyes for...you..."


	6. Sword Of Damocles

Xander moaned as she regained consciousness. Slowly she opened her eyes. Moving around some Xander soon found that she was chained with her hands above her head. The chains were wrapped around a low metal beam in the ceiling and rattled as she tested them. Nothing...they held fast. Warily she took in her surroundings. The room, was richly decorated, a functional and in use fireplace dominated one wall. She turned as much as the chains would allow so she could the rest of the room. A table covered in a silky bright red cloth sat to the side. A queen -sized bed with an ornate metal frame took up a good part of the room; it was draped in red satin-silk and black velvet bed covers. The wall behind her - well, the best she could tell was that it was where the door that led out of the room was located. After Xander spent a few more moments fruitless struggling against the chains she had soon come to the realization they were obviously spelled to be strong enough to hold a vampire. Sagging within their support, Xander let out a defeated sounding sigh and stared into the flames flickering in the fireplace as remembered how she got here...

_"Xander! There are at least twenty of them!"_

_Xander heard Buffy scream as the Slayer staked the closest to her._

_"Only nineteen now. Kind of evens the odds don't you think?" Xander said giving Buffy a slightly feral grin._

_"I'm thinking you have a plan?" This was not a question._

_"Divide and conquer is one I'm partial too."_

_The Slayer paused after she had slammed her fist into another minion, a female one this time, and making her fly into a crypt wall, "You take the ten on the right and I'll take the nine on the left?"_

_"Yep!"_

_***_

_Xander had dusted four of the minions she had been fighting before she realized she was being herded away from Buffy, or maybe it was the Slayer being lead away...as more minions melted out of the shadows._

_Knowing that there were far to many of them for just her and Buffy, Xander screamed a retreat to the Slayer across the clearing hoping Buffy would hear it. Just making out Buffy's nod before the blond girl dashed away in and explodestion of vamp dust, as a distraction, some of the vampires gave chase anyway. The rest turned toward Xander as the last original five she had been fighting began to circle her._

_Xander ran. She was the prey now. Should she stop, even to catch her breath, they would be on top of her._

_"Run, run," Xander chanted to herself, "Don't let the-acck!" A hand had reached out from behind a tree and grabbed her by the throat, slamming her against it. The impact knocked the breath out of her and the squeezing hand made it hard it catch her breath._

_"Tisk, tisk," was said mockingly, Xander followed the length of the arm that held her pinned to the tree, the glee in Angelus's eyes since a shiver of fear up her spin. "And to think it only took a few minions to make the feared Hyena run like a rabbit."_

_"A few!" Xander choked out as she struggled in Angelus's hold, "there were at least thirty of them!"_

_"I know," Angelus said with a sigh, "Spike really thought you could take them. Looks like he owes me ten bucks." Xander snarled, but was not able to break Angelus's hold on her. "You're kind of feisty. I like that." He said with a leer, "But you really are too much trouble..."_

_The next thing Xander knew everything went dark._

  
Xander tensed when she heard the door open, but didn't turn to look. She knew whom it was going to be. Footsteps softer than a cat's then, "Dru was right," Angelus purred seductively into her ear, "you look lovely in chains." Angelus circled, dragging one of his hands around Xander's waist, as he came around to face her, "So very lovely..."

Xander snorted, "Please, leave the sweet talk to Spike." Then with a smirk she said, "He does it so much _better,_ Deadboy."

Angelus was not about to let that insult pass. He casually backhanded Xander to the face. The blow caused her to sway, since the chains were holding most of her weight up as Xander gave the vampire her darkest glare.

"Do you really think your Black Knight will save you?" Angelus asked with a sneer, "That he would want to?" Xander said nothing but continued to glare.

"Well," Angelus said as he turned and walked over to the table covered in the red cloth, "I know for a fact he's enjoying Dru's tender...or maybe not-so- tender affections. Spike's little dalliance with you has displeased his dark goddess..." Then, in a move worthy of any great showman, Angelus yanked the cloth off the table revealing the contents on it.

"He'll be paying for it for a long while, I should think. Dru's not one to forgive easily." Angelus told Xander as he picked up a wicked looking dagger with a serrated edge, it gleamed in the low firelight. Fingering the edge he tested the sharpest of it, "But I think you and I can have some fun together," he said as he walked back over to Xander, shrugged at the look on the dark haired girl's face. "Or, at least I will."

***

Spike rolled over on the stone floor, sitting up, he took in his surroundings. Metal bars, on all sides of him. A cage.  Spike sighed, he should have known that Drusilla's sudden bout of affection was...well, not what he had been hoping it was. Moving his head, he hissed as a sharp pain it his neck. Gingerly he explored the ragged bite mark.

"Poor prince."

Spike looked up and saw Drusilla standing by the door to the cage.

"Come on, pet. Let me out."

"Daddy will punish you for your lies..."

"Dru what are you..." Spike trailed off when Drusilla brought a finger to her lips in a 'shush' motion.

"Can't you hear..?"

***

Angelus paused, as he looked at his handy work on Xander's back. The beautifully carved 'A' took up most of her shoulder blade. It was, he thought, his best work. Xander really was turning out to be a challenge. She had hardly made a sound. And that...well, that just wouldn't do.

"Everyone thought," Angelus said picking up the running conversation he had been having, mostly with himself since Xander wouldn't reply, "that _Angel,"_ the name was sneered, "was such a great guy. Personally I couldn't stand the whiny bastard. I always admired the fact that you, Xander didn't like Angel anymore than I did." He dragged the dagger across her skin, just deep enough to break open the skin and bleed nicely but not deep enough to scar. No worse than a paper cut really.

"But, and I hate to admit this, we did have a few things in common...our taste in slutty blondes, a good Irish whiskey," he turned the dagger suddenly digging it in to her back just a bit, grinning at the low groan that escaped the girl. "Drawing was also a past time we shared. Then, well, then there was you, Xander..." He pulled the dagger away and walked around in front of her, trailing the dagger over her shoulder and up under her chin, using the tip of the dagger to force Xander to look at him.

"We both wanted to see you brought down," Angelus leaned in and inhaled the sweet scent of her blood, "to hear you moan, to have you shatter..." he grinned darkly, "But mostly to hear you scream...And you will, you know. You _will_ scream for me."

***

At the first female screams of pain, the first scents of familiar blood, Spike had thrown himself at the cage doors. They rattled, but wouldn't give. Drusilla watched him from the shadows, sometimes smirking, sometimes not. But the only thing she ever said was, "Kitten's howling will drive you mad, sweet prince."

***

Drusilla stood outside of her Daddy's playroom. The screams had turned into low moans and soft cries as Kitten's voice had finally given out. Kitten was strong though. Stronger than she was...she would survive Daddy's affections. Miss Edith told her so and when she did sometimes Drusilla saw a green glow about the doll. Kitten would win out as Kitten had in the past. Though Drusilla hated the thought of losing her Wicked Light but feared that happened long ago.

"Suffer Kitten, for only then can you enjoy the cream..." Drusilla murmured to herself before she turned away from the door. Daddy got so upset when you interrupted his art time.

Besides Drusilla had a prince to play with for a while longer.

***

"It's been three days. Three days, Rupert!!!" Jessica Harris exclaimed as she paced the length of the library. Not looking as if she had eaten or sleep in just as long.

"I know." Giles said tightly, he was polished his glasses. He was worried for Xander too and he was worried about Jessica.

Jessica spun on her heel, "Do you? Cause I wonder..."

"I'm just as worried as you are!" Giles snapped as he then threw his glasses on the counter, "Buffy and the others have been searching everywhere...But if Angelus..." Jessica choose right then to speak over him.

"Speaking of, I'm still upset that my daughter had to disappear before I was told that Buffy's boyfriend was a vamp with a soul, or that said soul had gone bye-bye cause she slept with him."

"Jessica..." Giles said in a warning tone. They'd had this conversation before. Jessica shook her head at him then walked out of the library without another word. Giles growled and in a fit of temper swept a pile of books that was sitting on the corner of the book check out counter into the floor.

Jessica wanted answers, and she wanted them yesterday. She also knew there was just one person in the entire town who had them, or could get them if the price was right...that is.

***

Buffy walked into the Alibi Room. Willie was going to tell her where Angelus's new lair was. Buffy knew that the weasel knew, and he was going to tell her even if she had to beat it out of his - although, it seemed like someone had beat her to it. Buffy watched as Jessica Harris slammed the snitch's head onto the bar counter repeatedly.

"Tell," slam, "Me," slam, "Where," you get the idea, "They are!"

Buffy saw where Xander got her temper.

***

Xander tried not to let the tears of relief fall when Angelus finally...after so many hours...or, days...she had lost count, finally left the room. He would only be gone long enough to feed, Xander knew. She tried to use this time to regroup her mental defenses. But Angelus was slowly wearing her down. Lack of sleep, food, and near constant pain were not helping her resistance any.

***

Spike looked up, from the corner of the cage he was sitting in, as the door open expecting only Dru. It wasn't just Drusilla. Angelus stood there with her, his arm over her shoulders, and when they strolled into the room it was all Spike could do not to let his demon out as he fought back his instincts. Angelus was covered in blood, Xander's blood.

Angelus leaned against the bars of the cage, "Xander's going to break soon. You can tell by the look in her eyes. It's just a matter of time, really. But if I can the right thing to break her with..."

"What are you going on about?"

Angelus only smirked as Drusilla opened the door to the cage and knelt down in front of him, "Be in my eyes, sweet Spike," she whispered in her most thralling voice. Spike jerked back from her, but sitting in the corner of the cage as he was, he had nowhere to go. He knew this...it wasn't the first time she had used her powers on him. All too easily Spike found himself lost in his Sire's dark gaze as Angelus laughed in the background.

***

Angelus yanked Xander down the hall. It was the first time she had been freed of the chains since she got here. But found she was just too weak to fight him. It had been embarrassingly easy for Angelus to smack her down. He stopped at an open window and forced her to look out it. Below she could see a garden that had mostly night blooming jasmine in it. Drusilla walked into view and she was naked, she raised her hands over her head and looked like she was praying to the moon that shone overhead.  And maybe she was, Xander thought, as she watched Drusilla sway.

"There a point to this?" Xander muttered.

"Just watch." Angelus growled.

Drusilla turned, dropping her arms and made her way over to a prone male figure on he ground. She straddled the male's waist. Then threw her head back as she began to move in an up and down motion on top of the male. It wasn't long after that Xander could hear Drusilla's moans and cries of passion, she could also hear the male's. Xander wondered fleetingly why Angelus was showing her this, until the male under Drusilla sat up, pulling the dark vampiress closer to him. The moon turned platinum hair almost to sliver in it's light.

Xander closed her eyes and tried to block out the sight.

"Did you think he would save you? That he would leave his Dark Goddess for _you?"_ Angelus's sneering hiss in her ear caused her to open her eyes. The scene in the garden filled them once more and this time Xander found she couldn't look way, nor could she explain why she felt such pain as she watched the two vampires have sex.

"There he is...only thinking of himself. And don't try and fool yourself either, he knows you're here. He knows what I've been doing...he just doesn't care." Angelus whispered, then continued in a purring tone, "Is it fair that he has pleasure, while you receive pain? Don't you want him to hurt, to suffer as you have?"

Xander said nothing as she stared at the two in the garden.

***

Jessica stood with her arms over her chest as she looked out the kitchen window. _Seven days. It had been seven days since her daughter had disappeared_.' She thought. And in SunnyDale that was a long time. Giles came up behind her and pulled her into his arms.

"We will find her, Jess. I promise."

Jessica nodded. 'But will we find her alive?'

***

Buffy growled as she threw the male minion into the wall, "Tell me very thing you know!"

***

Willow sat at her computer going over all the listings for newly sold or abandon relastate.  
Cordelia entered the room and put down the snack tray on the desk.

"Stop and eat something."

"Not now, Cordy."

"Yes, Wills, now!"

Willow turned and looked a t her girlfriend and saw that she was wearing a version of her own resolve face.

***

Amy and Jonathan sat in the library going over spell books, trying to find a locator spell strong enough to find Xander with. They paused as the low growl that came from the weapons cage, then continued to look at the books, Oz could help them in the morning.

***

Xander struggled, pulling on the chains that now bound her to the wall. Angelus had chained her to it after showing her the scene in the garden...a day ago? Maybe? It was so hard to keep track of time.

She blinked, had she fallen asleep? Because, Spike, was now lying on the floor in front of her. He hadn't been there a moment ago. He had been badly beaten, in fact he looked worse than when Glory had gotten a hold of him in the 'Before'. He tried valiantly to pick himself up, but seemed to weak to do so and collapsed back to the floor with a groan. Angelus laughed from the doorway and strolled into the room.

He pulled Spike up by his duster, blindly the blond lashed out at Angelus. But Spike's struggles seemed to only amuse the dark vampire. Angelus roughly removed the duster from Spike and carelessly tossed it to the floor.

"Now the real fun can begin..." Angelus taunted them both.

It wasn't until Spike hit the wall and Angelua pck up a whip from the table did Xander fully understand what was about to happen. When she did her fight they the chains were renewed. Xander's eyes glowed, and she hissed and growled at every cry of pain Spike made.

***

After Angelus left the room, his smirk never leaving his face. Xander had stopped fighting the chains when she realized she wasn't getting loose. The blood running down her wrists were proof of that.She had thought she knew what pain was...what torture was...Angelus had taken his time in showing her. But she was wrong, so very wrong.

_Thawp!_

Xander turned her head at the sound. The naked, broken, bleeding creature lay on the floor by the bed. She watched with an almost disinterest as he slowly crawled toward her. Very movement causing him pain, broken bones shifted, cuts and bites breaking open anew as he left a trail of blood behind him.

As Spike made his way to Xander his only thoughts were of her. After Drusilla's thrall wore off he had found himself Angelus punching bag, then had been dragged here. And...and... _No! Don't think about that. Think about her, only she matters now_!' Spike had become worried when Xander had stopped screaming curses at Angelus, stopped telling the dark vampire the creative way in which she was going to kill him. It warmed Spike's undead heart that his girl cared so much.

But as everyone knew, a quiet Xander was a dangerous one.

Finally he had made it over to her, he fell into her lap. Xander's chains were long enough that she could touch Spike. Xander carefully began to pet the blood soaked hair of the shaking vampire. Spike curled as close as he could get to her. He was startled when a low rumbling sound began. It sounded much like when Drusilla would purr. It was a comfort that he had gotten a lot as a fledge. He hadn't known Xander could do that too.

When the tears fell, Xander said nothing but she kept purring and continued to stroke Spike's hair. Knowing their time was short until Angelus came back.

***

Spike screamed as the whip cut once more into his already bleeding back. Angelus had chained him in the middle of the room with his arms over his head. The bloody bastard hadn't been to happy to find him curled up in Xander's arms when he had returned a few hours ago from his Slayer stalking.

Angelus leaned close and whispered into Spike's ear, "Can you see it yet, sweet Wil? How close she is..? I realized very quickly that torturing Xander, as fun as that is, wouldn't get me anywhere. But hurt someone she cares about...and we all know she cares about you. Which personally I can't understand myself. But, well, look at her now..." Angelus roughly turned Spike so that he was facing the wall that Xander was chained to, Xander, Spike could see was staring at them. That blank look in her eyes reminded Spike of Drusilla when Angelus's games had got to be too much for the vampiress.

Spike closed his eyes. He was actually glad that Angelus that turned most of his ire on him, rather than his girl. Spike knew he could survive Angelus's affections. After all, he had back when he was a fledgling, hadn't he. Compared to that, this - well this was nothing.

"She's going to break, m'boy. And when she does...she'll be more lovely than Drusillla."

Spike growled lowly at the taunt.

"Tell me Spike, which one of us do you think she'll cry out for in her dark need...Which one will _she_ call Daddy?"

Spike lunged at Angelus, baring his fangs growling but the chains held fast. Angelus snickered and then resumed whipping Spike.

***

"You're going to die, Deadboy!" came the hoarse whisper from behind the dark vampire. 

Angelus froze in the middle of whipping what skin was left off of Spike's back. Slowly he turned and faced Xander. Her coffee colored eyes glittered with a feral madness in the low light from the fireplace. The shiver that ran down Angelus's back surprised him. The impact of the words were made more impressive because Xander's eyes never once turned that demonic glowing green. No, they stayed brown in color. Those words came not from the Primal, but the human.

***

Willie wondered for the millionth time, if perhaps he should find another line of work, because bartending was just getting all tighter too dangerous. Or maybe it was just his clientele, and the troubles that came with them that were the authors of his difficulties. This of course was what was going through his mind as his head was being pinned to the countertop of his bar once again - by the mother of 'The Hyena', who he really wasn't surprised to find out was Jessica Harris. In retrospect, the girl was all too much like her mother for him to have missed it.

"I'm getting tired of this, Willie, and I don't think you can survive any more head trauma." Jessica growled.

"Come on, Jess! I've told you everything I know!"

Jessica rolled her eyes, "Willie, Willie, come on now. You know I know better than that. I did go to school with you." She pulled his head up by the grip she had on his hair and slammed his head back down on the counter. "You do know that with just the right amount of pressure I can break your neck, don't you?"

"You wouldn't..."

Jessica pulled his head back and stared into his eyes, "You've been in this business since high school. You know the score..." Jessica sighed, "She's my daughter, Willie.  What would you do if it was Lorraine, or Julia?"

And that, Willie thought, was just unfair. To bring his own wife and daughter into this, Willie sighed.  He really was too nice of a guy, he thought. He said, "There have been rumors, try the mansion on Crawford Street."

"Thank you." Jessica whispered.

***

"Are you sure this will work?" Connor asked Dawn.

Dawn shrugged and looked at the scene in the vision-portal. Drusilla was swaying and her dance was almost manic.

"It has so far." Dawn murmured.

***

Drusilla stopped her mad dance and went to her Daddy's art room.  Her Spike lay on the bed. Her dear boy had suffered Daddy's affections again. But it was the low growling from the other side of the room that got her attention. She walked over and knelt down in front of Kitten.

"The key whispers that the lock will break if you stay, Kitten."

Kitten shook her shackled wrists and snarled, "It's not like I can go anywhere."

"How problematic for you," Drusilla said with a nod, "Would Kitten run and hide if she were free?"

Kitten blinked owlishly then nodded slowly. Drusilla took hold of one of the manacles that bound Kitten's wrists and broke it open then did the same to the other. After that Drusilla slowly backed away from the other girl, until she back into the bed where Spike still lay. She sat down on the bed beside him, "My poor prince..." She cooed, and then said, "The show's not finished...the liar he still must play."

Kitten shook her head, "Angelus knows..."

Drusilla snorted, "Daddy only knows that which we tell him." Then Drusilla's eyes got big and round as a frightened look came into them, and then she spoke in an awed tone of voice, "Kitten had been saving her strength and tore the chains from the wall. Spike, dear Spike was too weak from Daddy's play to stop her. She dusted many, many, many minions in her flight...."

***

Xander ran from the mansion as quickly as she could. Knowing that should Angelus catch her again there would be no other chances for escape. She had wanted to take Spike with her but Drusilla said he had to stay for the plan to work. And yes, the irony of trusting an insane vampiress plan was not lost on Xander.

***

"...I was so very scared of Kitten. Her glowing eyes...and she growled at me! Then she threw princess into a wall."

Angelus growled, something about this story just didn't add up. But Spike was backing up the story. No surprise there. As were the few surviving minions, and the fact that the only minions who had survived were Drusilla's was not lost on Angelus.

He shook his head. His Dru was something else. He had almost forgotten the first rule when dealing with her. She was crazy, not stupid. He would have to punish her for this betrayal.

***

Xander stumbled up on to the porch of her house and from there to the door that she opened and fell into with a sigh. She was safe now.  The noise she made with her less than graceful entrance brought the others in the house to the living room. She looked up and saw her mom and Giles.

"I'm home." Xander said, then she promptly passed out.

***

Spike growled, "He dies Dru! No more!" He gathered a bleeding Drusilla into his arms. Angelus had beaten her for helping Xander.

Drusilla sighed and turned to her Childe, she knew his pain and knew she could take it away. She wrapped her arms around him and looked deep into his eyes before beginning to whisper, "Be in me, be in my eyes sweet Childe..."


	7. Past Remebered

**2004-The Before...**

_"There really are moments that make you what you are. They set the course for who you're going to be. And sometimes they are subtle moments, and sometimes they are not."_

_Spike glared at the dead cheerleader who had worked for the Poof that was telling him this. She had ruined his 'about to be a noble sacrifice for the world' gesture by appearing and yanking him into the weird upper realm that, Spike was sure under normal circumstances, he would never have seen._

_"Well, pet," Spike sneered. "I was about to have one of those moments, but you came along..."_

_"Oh, Please! All you were going to do was die messily." Cordelia Chase sneered back at him; "The Powers That Be wanted you for a reason. Why, I'll never guess. Angel would have been a better choice, I'm thinking."_

_Spike rolled his eyes at her. Cordelia waved her hand and a vision-portal appeared, it began showing scenes of LA._

_The world over was a wasteland where demons were roaming around freely. Slayers were being slaughtered by the dozens._

_The Cleveland Hellmouth was open and spewing forth all sort of unmentionable evil things._

_In Rome, The Immortal stood over Buffy Summers who had a sword through her stomach. She was tired, scared, and knew she was going to die again - betrayed by her lover._

_In England Giles was leading an army of Slayers again demons they were fighting at Stonehenge._

_Willow was floating over Rio; her white hair blew away from her face as she shouted spells at the demons below her._

_Back in Stanford, California Dawn stood back to back with Connor as they defended the college campus._

_"We're losing..."_

_"Well, that's obvious, pet." Spike muttered._

**1998-Present**

Xander paced in her living room. Her mother and Giles sat on the sofa. Buffy, who had just come back from patrol, leaned against the wall by the front door. "Why couldn't I go on patrol with Buffy? I'm fine now." Xander all but snarled at them.

"Xan-girl, it's only been two weeks since..."Jessica trailed off not wanting to mention the torture her daughter had gone through. "Just because you can heal fast doesn't mean you're completely well yet."

Xander sighed, "I've told you..."

"No, you haven't." Buffy broke in, "You haven't told us anything!"

"Excuse me! So I don't want to give you a blow by blow of the week _your_ boyfriend spent torturing me!"

"Xander," Giles began softly, "You do know what the mark Angelus put on your shoulder means, don't you?"

Xander glared at him, "Better than you. But you don't have to worry. Angelus never touched me sexually. It wasn't about that. Although if I had stayed longer it could have been. No, he just wanted to bring me down...Brreak me..." Her voice began to slowly rise in volume, "Drive me insane if he could...make another Drusilla...hear me scream!!!" Xander was almost yelling at them.

"Xander..." Jessica started.

Xander stopped and closed her eyes, maybe she wasn't as fine as she thought she was, and took a deep breath. "I'll be okay."

They wondered just who Xander was trying to convince. Them or herself.

"I'll heal, but what I had to watch Angelus do to Spike...." Xander trailed off with a low growl and her eyes glowing demonically.

When Xander had reappeared two weeks ago and collapsed in front of her mother and Giles, Giles had been forced to explain to Jessica who and what Xander was now - well, as far as he knew anyway. It seemed it wasn't totally unexpected as Jessica was far from stupid and she had known for a while something had changed for Xander, that she was different for some reason. Her girl had healed far too fast, and if the broken doors were any kind of indictors, she was way too strong now not to have something behind it all. Jessica had thought for a moment that Xander was a Slayer too. Seeing what those differences and changes in her daughter allowed first hand and knowing the reasons of the 'why' and 'hows' behind them, it was positively eye-opening. Much more than she ever would have guessed. But, then she'd also managed to learn from Xander's nightmares - and Giles when she confronted him for confirmation - that Spike - William, her Xan's sometime Romeo -.Angelus's grandchilde in fact. Jessica had been livid when she had found that out. It wasn't the fact that Spike was a vampire that upset her, because it wasn't like she hadn't had some suspicions like that already about Spike. No, what had her so angry was the fact that neither, Xander, nor Giles, had told her.

"So, what happens now?" Buffy asked.

Xander snorted, "We stop Angelus's delusions of grandeur."

***

**Past 1997**

_Spike growled as he stumbled through another portal, propelled clumsily forward from a push to the back by Cordelia._

_"Where are we?" Spike asked as he looked around. They were in a graveyard, a familiar one if he wasn't mistaken. And, yes, there was his old crypt. He turned toward Cordelia questioningly._

_"Where do you think?"_

_"Sunnyhell, but why?" He asked, then was distracted by the sounds of a nearby fight. As old instincts kicked in he took off towards the fight._

_The sight that greeted him was a slight surprise, yet at the same time not. A young girl was fighting a small group of vampires, but it was not the blond he had been expecting._ _It was a shapely brunette dressed in a black leather jacket, white tee shirt, black skin-tight jeans. Doc Martins completed the look. Spike_ _watched the girl dust the nearest one, then spread arms wide and grin at the vampires. In her left hand Spike could see a stake. She asked, "Are you even trying? Cause as vamps...you're well, you're laughable!"_

_One of the vamps rushed the girl and she dusted it with careless flourish. The remaining four tried to dog-pile her and she went down under their weight. Spike started forward but Cordelia grabbed his arm and shook her head. Then there was a growling sound and a yipping laugh that caused a shiver to run down Spike's spine._

_The explosion of dust drifted down over the dark haired girl as she now stood panting for breath._

_"Bloody brilliant..." Spike said but frowned when the girl walked past him and Cordelia like they weren't even there._

_"She can't see or hear us. We're slightly out of phase with this reality." Cordelia told him._

_"Her reality?" Spike asked._

_"Someone made a wish and with it reality changed."_

_"When?"_

_"Towards the end of your battle with Blackthorn. It was how the PTB's were able to grab you without the other side noticing."_

_Spike nodded, that made as much sense as anything ever did._

_"Who's she?"_

_Cordelia smirked, "She is the Hyena...Guardian of the Hellmouth...Hunt Sister to the Slayer...She sees all and alone will bring the great change...She is the Prophecy Breaker."_

_Spike blinked._

_"Was that dramatic enough or does the spiel need more kick to it?" Cordelia asked._

_Spike just blinked again._

_Cordelia sighed, "Actually her destiny is kind of a downer really. But with a bit of help..." She waved and a vision-portal appeared._ _A vampire in full demon face with bleached blond hair, he was wearing a black leather trench coat. The vampire broke a young man's neck and then carelessly tossed the body aside. As a dark hair vampiress danced into view clapping and singing her enjoyment of the act._

_"She'll need the help of William the Bloody..."_

_"Me?"_

_Cordelia sighed, "No, William the Bloody. The moment you got your soul and died for the world, you stopped being William the Bloody and became Spike, a champion of the Powers That Be..._

_***_

**1998-Present**

"Look, Giles, all I know is that it's called 'Acathla' and that it can open a portal that can suck earth into hell." Xander told him as she sat on the table in the library, she kicked her legs back and forth.

"That's all?" Giles asked as he pulled books of the shelves.

Xander scratched her head, "The ritual has something to do with blood...I think? I really wasn't listening when you babbled the explanation the first time. I had other things to worry about."

Giles gave her a 'look'. She had got one similar when that had gone to the museum and Giles realized she had known the guy in charge of the museum. It was a 'look' she got a lot from Giles.

***

Spike sat on the edge on the small fountain while he read the newspaper. He barely noticed when Drusilla came into the garden. He was missing time and the memories he had were blurry. He repressed a low growl. He hated it when Dru played with his head, often he would be left wondering if he were missing something important.

"Have a nice walk, sweet?"  Spike forced himself to ask her. He knew he would forgive her...he always did.

Dru rubbed her stomach as if it hurt, " I met an old man," she raised a hand to her mouth and began to lick her fingers, "he got all stuck in my teeth." She turned looking up at the moon; "It tries to whisper to me..." she looked at Spike, "such dreadful things it whispers."

"What did it say?" Angelus asked as he walked in to the garden.

"Oh look who's still alive. What the slayer still couldn't kill you?" Spike snarked and couldn't stop the flinch when Angelus thumped him in the back of the head as he walked past.

"What did the naughty moon tell my girl? Did you have a vision? Is something coming...tell Daddy."

"It said something terrible comes..." Drusilla moaned and put a hand to her head.

"Where?"

"At the museum. A tomb...like a jack in the box...there's a prize inside!" Drusilla murmured with a coy smile.

"You can see all that? In your head?" Angelus asked his tone boarding towards awe.

Spike snorted, "No, you moron." Spike said handing him the newspaper, "She read it in the SunnyDale Press."

Angel snatched the newspaper from Spike and read the headline out loud, "Mysterious Obelisk Unearthed."

***

**The Higher Realms**

Shadow watched SunnyDale it was not something he did often. The many intrigues of the Powers That Be, the Elders and the Senior Partners of W&H had been keeping him more than entertained. But every once in a while he tuned in to SunnyDale to watch the drama unfold.

Xander Harris had slowly impressed him. Something that Shadow was sure would make her overjoyed if she knew, he thought vaguely sarcastically. But right now he was watching a young Red and Buffy as they put a yellow disk into a computer. A frown came to Shadow's face as he watched the stunned look cross Buffy's face when she read the computer screen.

Shadow sighed; he had been hoping the bloody Poof would get staked this time around...he should have known that wasn't very likely. But Shadow had hoped.

****

Buffy and Willow burst through the library doors and Buffy cried happily, "We found it! We found Ms. Calendar's spell to restore Angel's soul!"

Xander where she was sitting a table going through an old text on Acathla looked up at hearing Buffy's exclamation, her expression blank. Cordelia had been sitting across from Xander and had been doing her nails while she had been waiting for Willow to get done tutoring Buffy. Buffy's announcement didn't exactly make her want to jump for joy either. Cordelia hadn't been happy to learn about what happened to Xander at Angelus's hands.

"She said it couldn't be done." Giles said softly, but had known how guilty Jenny had felt.

"Well, she did it anyway! Willow looked it over and said it just might work."

'Even after what that bastard did...' Xander turned away so none of them could see her expression,  'Buffy still wants him.  Some things never change.'

Cordelia looked up from her nails, "This is a good thing, right? I mean we can re-curse him, can't we?"

Buffy began to pace back and forth, thinking. It was a habit she had picked up from Xander.

"Well, it certainly points that way." Giles said answering Cordelia, "But..." Giles stopped and gathered his thoughts before continuing, "The ritual itself requires a great deal of knowledge of the black arts...more so than I can claim."

"I've been going though Jenny's files, for fun. I...I may be able to work this." Willow said slowly.

Xander slammed the book in front of her closed causing Cordelia to jump. Slowly Xander stood up, "No"

The others looked surprised at the soft venom in the tone. Xander took a deep breath, "For those of you that have just tuned in...Willow, you're not even an amateur witch, and you can't even float a pencil. This spell is so far out of your league it's not funny." She stood up and walked around the table. "This spell is to restore Angel's soul...well, here's a thought...Who cares?"

"I care!" Buffy all but growled.

"Color me not surprised." Xander sneered at her.

"Let's not lose our perspective here, Xander." Giles said trying to head off the fight he could see brewing.

"This is my perspective...Angel's a killer."

"So is Spike!" Buffy shouted at Xander.

"Well, yeah, but here's the real question. Did Spike spend a week in a half torturing you simply because he could? No, Spike just wanted you dead. But he didn't try drawing out your suffering, did he?"

"It's not that simple, Xander." Willow said.

"So all should be forgiven?" Xander asked as she sent a disbelieving look at the red head, "Everything he did to me...to Spike? I should forgive that?! Angelus needs to die!"

"Stop it, just stop it, Xander!" Buffy screamed.

Xander glared at the Slayer as Buffy snarled, "What happened wasn't Angel's fault."

"You can paint this in any pretty color you want but it doesn't change what he did!"

"You bitch." whispered Buffy.

Xander's expression turned cold. She looked at the Slayer and knew Buffy would do what she wanted, everyone else be damned. Xander shook her head and left the library.

***

Later that night, as Xander walked down the deserted streets of the town while on patrol, she wondered if her reaction might have been a bit extreme. She had left the house to avoid Willow's phone calls trying to patching things up between Buffy and Xander. But Xander just wasn't ready to make nice yet.

Xander froze when she heard a slight rustling of the bushes next to her; she pivoted around with her fist held up to throw a punch when a young woman came out of them.

"Kendra," Xander said to the slayer.

"I was going to Buffy's when I saw you walking." She told Xander.

"Let me guess. You're here because a dark power is about to rise in the Dale?"

"Dat's about it."

"Yay."

***

Spike leaned next to the fireplace. He watched as Angelus and Drusilla made their way across the main hall of the mansion to him. The minions were struggling to set up the obelisk.

"It's a rock. Nobody else has a rock this big. Can't wait to tell all my friends." Spike deadpanned.

"You never did pay any attention to your history, Spike." Angelus growled.

Spike rolled his eyes and in the still deadpanned tone said, "Acathla, the demon, who came forth to swallow the world. But was killed by a virtuous white hat, who pierced the demon's heart before he could take his first breath. Turning all stone- like, as the fairytales say will happen to evil demons and/or people. Then Acathla was buried where no man or demon would look," He paused as a smirk came to his lips, "Unless of course it's to put up low rent housing..."

Spike's eyes narrowed at the minions who were now using crowbars to pry open the obelisk, the lid pops off and crashes to the floor with a loud bang. Reveling a tall stocky stone demon, with horns on it's head, spike-like protrusions running down it's chest and a frown on it's face, "Then some idiot who thinks ending the world is a 'good idea' comes along and..." The demon also has as word sticking out from its chest where, Spike guessed its heart would be.

Drusilla started to sway and hum softly, "He fills my head...the stars can't speak!"

Angelus grinned darkly as he picked up Spike's narration, "And some one worthy pulls out the sword...the demon awakes and wackiness ensues."

"And so history repeats itself." Spike muttered softly.

***

Xander, leaned with her arms crossed over her chest, against the table rolling her eyes at Buffy. Kendra stood next to her as Buffy glared at Xander. Willow was behind the library counter with a book researching and looking worriedly at Xander and Buffy.

Giles came out of his office, "I just got off the phone to the museum. The artifact as been stolen and the man in charge of it murdered."

"Are you sure this was the tomb of Alfalfa?" Buffy asked.

Xander snorted, "A little rascal this demon ain't."

"Acathla," Giles said correcting Buffy, "And yes. The information provided by Kendra's watcher seems conclusive."

Willow walked out from behind the counter towards them, "Explain the whole 'he will suck the world in to hell' part again." She stopped by Xander, "Cause that's the part I'm just not loving."

"The demon universe exists in a dimension separate from our own," Xander said in a bored tone while ignoring the surprised look Giles gave her, "With one breath Acathla will create a vortex ...it will pull everything on earth into that dimension where all non-demonic life will suffer eternal torment."

Giles raised an eyebrow at the paraphrase, "I thought you didn't pay attention to what I said in the 'Before' of yours?"

Xander sighed, "I just don't want to do any more research."

"So this would be there literal kind of sucked into hell," Buffy said trying to smile but failing turned to Willow, "I think you should try the curse."

"You can't be serious!" Xander growled out.

Buffy shot Xander a sharp glare in return and was about to speak when Kendra said, "I must agree with Xander on this. Angel should be eliminated."

"Oh, I'll fight him and kill him if I have too, " Buffy said as Xander snorted in disbelief but continued, "But Willow may be our only hope if I don't get there in time or, if I lose."

Willow looked shocked first, pleased second, and lastly terror filled at Buffy's faith in her, "I can't be the only hope! I crumble under pressure! Besides Amy is stronger magically then me. She should do the spell. Please say I'm not the only hope!"

"No, Will, I have faith in you. Besides Amy went with her dad to L.A. for the weekend, remember?" Buffy said.

"Oh, yeah." Willow muttered.

Xander smirked at Willow, "Don't worry, Wills. There is another."

Kendra pulled a sword out of the bag that was sitting on the table in front of them.

"Blessed by the knight who first slew the demon. If all else fails, this might stop it." Kendra paused and looked at the sword in her hand with a slight frown, "I think."

Willow went to get the things needed for the soul spell as Giles asked fro a closer look at the sword. When Willow said she needed an Orb of Thesulah it turned out Giles had one he had been using as a paperweight. As Giles got the Orb for Willow he told them, "Angelus has his own ritual to perform before he can remove the sword and awaken the demon. With any luck it will take him awhile to figure out what it is..."

***

"I will drink..." Angelus murmured to the young human man, who was bare-chested and had his hands tied behind his back. Angelus reached out and caressed the man's face in a mock loving gesture. Then grabbed the man's hair roughly and yanked his head to the side.

Angelus morphed into his demonic face, "...As I ascend..." He slammed his fangs into the exposed neck of the man. Once he drank his fill he pulled away and dropped the now corpse of the young man carelessly to the side.

Angelus spread his arms wide and threw his head back as he roared out, "Becoming!!!"

***

**~Past 1997~**

_As Spike watched, the graveyard around him faded into a bedroom. Spike looked around taking in the décor of the room. There were movie posters on the walls, on a nearby book shelves there were Sci-fi novels, romance and what looked like a copy of the Cassandra Prophesies. Cordelia sat on the desk in the corner, filing her nails in a bored fashion.  Before Spike could ask where they were the door to the bedroom opened and the dark haired girl from the graveyard walked in talking on a cell phone._

_"No." She said._

_"No! Not happening."_

_"Well...maybe?"_

_"Okay, okay! Just give it a rest Buffy! I'll do the patrol tomorrow so you can make time with Deadboy."_

_"Yeah, yeah."_

_"Whatever."_

_"Night Buffy." The girl said as she close up the cell phone and tossed the phone at the desk without looking, Cordelia jumped off the desk just in time to avoid being hit with the phone._ _The girl yanked off the leather jacket she was wearing and dropped it on the floor then walking over to the bed flopping down on it with a deep sigh. She lay there for a moment then turn over and reached pulling a notebook from under the mattress._ _Opening it she picked up the pen that had been left between the pages._

_"Let's see..." She said to herself, "Stopped the demon that would have destroyed Baker Street...Won the Talent Show last night...that didn't happen before..."_

_Spike could see the bemusement on the girl's face at this statement._

_"What's next?" She muttered, "Oh...Right! Buffy goes up against the Master in a couple months..." She looked up from the page in front of her as stared off in to space as she tapped her pen on the notebook, "Then what?"_

_Spike listened as the girl named and wrote down a few more things but he saw slightly overwhelmed look on her face that turned almost frighten when she softly said, "Spike..." He looked at Cordelia who shook her head and he then remembered that the girl couldn't see them._

_"Looks like my social calendar is going to be full for awhile." The girl said to herself then she suddenly threw the notebook across the room. Covering her face with her hands and saying muffled, "I can't do this! It's to much..." She was silent for a few seconds then she took a deep breath and dropped her hand from her face, "You have to get it together, Xander."_

_Spike blinked at that. He could not have heard right. He looked at Cordelia, the smirk on her face was telling. But he still had to actually ask in a slightly strangled tone, "That's Harris?!"_

_****_

**~ 1998 Present~**

"Looks like someone wasn't worthy..." Spike sing-songed out after Angelus had been thrown back from Acathla after trying to remove the sword from the chest of the statue.

"I must have missed something..." Angelus snarled getting up and beginning to pace. Spike made no attempt to hide his snickers. Drusilla moaned softly, "What are we going to do," and rung her hands together.

Angelus turned to them menace rolling off him in waves, "What I always do in times of trouble: turn to an old friend." He grabbed a nearby vase and threw it at the wall and yelled, "WE WILL HAVE OUR ARMAGEDDON!!!"

The vase smashed against the wall in a hundred pieces.

***

**~Past 1998~**

_Spike looked down onto the bed that held a slumbering Drusilla. She was like a princess from a fairy tale, next to her lay his own double. Spike sighed as he brought up the glass vial of bluish-silver liquid. The Cheerleader told him that he had to drink it in order to past on his memories to his double. But that it would only transfer all his memories up to when he battled the forces of Blackthorn and nothing of his time with Cordelia._

_The only thing that worried him was exactly how his memories would be given to the other._

_When Spike had asked Cordelia all she did was shrug and say, "You're a smart vamp. Figure it out."_

_He had also asked about the black cloak she had given to him to wear,  "Fashion statement." Was what she replied._

_Spike took a deep breath and downed the liquid in one quick gulp. It was thicker than it looked, also it had the consistency of snot...and it tasted about the same as well. He shuddered as he choked it down. Praying (although he wasn't sure to who) that it would stay down._

_He stepped toward the bed._

_'It was a good thing,' Spike thought, 'that he was such a narcissistic bastard.'_

_He then leaned down and pressed his lips to that of his counter part, a sharp pain hit Spike in his head so like the pain he use to get from the chip he gasped in surprise but his lips never left the other's._

_Memories played quickly though his mind at high speed. Everything in his human life then his death and after that his unlife as a vampire. A century of memories good and bad came and went in a flash._

_Finally, finally the end came._

_His second death in a fiery ball of sunlight. The cold blackness of *that* place came after...Spike was never sure where *that* place was but the one thing he did know was that he *never * wanted to go back!_

_Then there was Angel._

_It was always about Angel, wasn't it?_

_Blackthorn._

_A dark, wet, city alley with a dragon flying overhead._

_Spike stumbled back as his double began to thrash around on the bed. He quickly pulled up the hood of the cloak._

_His counter part sat up with a frighten gasp._

_*****_

**~Present 1998~**

  
After Buffy had left to see to Angel. Xander watched as Willow began to set up for the spell to return Angel's soul. Cordelia sat next to Willlow and would pass her the items that were needed for the spell.

Xander knew this wasn't going to work.

"Let him know the pain..."Willow began just as the main door of the library were thrown open and four vampires came pouring in two headed straight towards Kendra who had spun to face the door. One came at Xander while the last one went after Willow and Cordelia.

Xander's assailant rushed her but Xander neatly sidestepped the vampire. Turning to face the vampire, which put her back to the library door. She never saw the dark haired vampiress come up behind her...

  
***

Angelus smirked as the Slayer hit the ground. "This was never about you..."

He laughed at the look of horror that came over the girl's face.

***

Throwing down the half smoked cigarette, Spike made a choice.

***

Drusilla smiled darkly as she drew her sharp nail across the throat of the dark-skinned Slayer. The Slayer grabbed at her throat eyes widening, the blood flowed thickly and quickly through her fingers.  Slowly she collapsed to the floor.

"Nighty-night." She said making kissing noises.

Drusilla then walked to the library doors pausing she glanced down at the body of the dark-haired girl who had stolen her prince. "The fairy tale will change when you awaken from your sleep. A dark bard will sing, your temptation it will bring. No kiss for you."

***

**~Higher Realm-Past/Present 1998~**

_Spike blinked, as he looked around the endless expanse of white that just disturbed him, "Where are we?"_

_Cordelia shrugged a shoulder, "That doesn't really matter."_

_"Huh?"_

_She held up a hand. It was fading in and out of view. She took a step towards him but stumbled. Spike moved quickly and caught her before she fell. She smiled weakly at him, "You're never ready for the big moments. You can never see them coming..."_

_"What's happening to you?" Spike asked as Cordelia's whole body began to do the same fading as her hand had._

_"You've changed fate." Cordelia said with a bright smile as she reached up and kissed him softly on the lips._

_Spike jumped a bit at the small shock that went through him. Spike licked his lips then hissed at her, "What did you do?"_

_"You changed my fate. I no longer need the spark that made me a Higher Power. So I gave it to you while I could."_

_"Why?"_

_"Think of it as a reward...You're now a Higher Power. I gave to you..." Cordelia faded a bit more from his arms, "What you're giving me...you are the one who will remember the shadows of the past..."_

_"Why me?" Spike asked._

_Cordelia grinned and before she faded completely from view said, "Why not you?"_

_***_   
  
**Buffy raced into the school. Running down the hall she slammed through the doors of the library...**

Popcorn came flying through the air and hit the portal-vision screen. The Higher Being watching the unfolding events snarled in boredom.

"Like I want to watch the Slayer's angst. Let's get to the good part." The Being said picking up a remote control looking device then hit the button with the tow arrows that pointed right.

**Xander sat up and touched the back of her head, it came away bloody. "Can I say, 'owie'." She then looked over and saw Buffy next to Kendra, just as two police officers came through the door. Outside the library both Xander and Buffy were being lead along forcefully by the police officers.**

**"We didn't do any thing!" Buffy defended them.**

**Snyder choose that moment to come up to them. The officers asked who they were.**

**"Buffy Summers and Xander Harris. If there's trouble, they're behind it somehow." Snyder said gloatingly.**

**Xander growled and jerked away from the officer holding her shoulder, "You dumb troll! You have *no* idea!"**

**"Attitude problems just like that, Harris got you where you are now. But I suppose you take after your mother in that way."**

**Xander growled again and taking a step toward Snyder then on of the officers jerked her back saying, "That's enough!"  Xander exchange a slow meaningful look with Buffy then at her slight nod kicks the officer holding her as Buffy backhand punches the other one. They both are narrowly missed by the gunshots the police fire at them.**

''''''''''  
 **Xander and Buffy walk down the hall away from Willow's room in the hospital. They just found out from Cordelia that Giles hadn't been seen. Both knew Angelus had him.**

**''''''''**   
**Angelus grinned at the bruised and bleeding Englishman; "You know they didn't even have chainsaws the last time I tortured a Watcher."**

**'''''''''**   
**Xander saw the two police officers coming toward them and quickly pulled Buffy into a darken corner of the hall. Wrapping her arms around the other girl pushing Buffy's face into her shoulder as Xander hid her own in Buffy's hair until the two had passed by them.**

**''''''''**   
**After Detective Stein had left Joyce Summers turned to look at Jessica Harris with a worried and confused look.**

**Jessica sighed, "I think it's time I told you a few things about SunnyDale."**

**'''''''**   
**A police officer held his gun on Xander and Buffy they were both frighten and slowly began to raise their hands. When suddenly the gun got kicked from the officer's hands, then kicked in the face and the shin rapidly and was thrown into the hood of his car so quickly it all looked like one movement.**

**The attacker turned to face the girls, the blonde looked shocked with the brunette looked grateful and slightly put out.**

**"Hello, cuties." Spike said.**

The Higher Being known as Shadow smirked at the entrance of the blond vampire on the portal-vision. "That's more like it. Talk about your' must see TV'."

***

**~Present 1998~**

"It' about time you showed up," Xander muttered as Spike grinned saying, "Sorry, pet. But traffic was a bitch!"

"So now what?" Buffy asked her hand clenched around the stake she was holding.

"Now, we talk about a trust and putting Angelus in the ground." Spike told her.

"That has to be the lamest..." Buffy started but the blond vampire cut in with, "Angelus has your watcher."

"What do you want?" Buffy asked warily.

Spike snickered, "What does any vamp want? Blood, violence, and a pretty bint to make time with," he said waggling his eyebrows at Xander who grimaced at that, "I want to save the world!"

"You're kidding, right?" Buffy asked.

Xander snorted softly, "Buff, haven't you figured it out? Vamps just talk big."

Spike nodded as he hopped up onto the hood of the police car pulling out a pack of cigarettes. He took one out and lit it. "I like this world actually. You've got cricket, Happy Meals...and pretty brown eyed girls"

Xander looked away and knew she was blushing from the intent look in Spike's blue eyes. She shook her head thinking, _'Hitting on me twice in less than five minutes has got to be a record.'_

Spike took a drag off the cigarette, "Angel though as a real passion for destruction. He could actually pull this off, you know." He suddenly jumped down off the hood of the car and walked over next to Xander.

"Why come to us?" Buffy asked.

He took another drag and didn't look at Xander  when he said, " I want Dru back. I want things like they were..."

To Xander that statement was like a sword through her stomach. He was denying their friendship and whatever this other thing was between them. The thought enraged her,  "Your pathetic..." Xander whispered harshly. Knowing what Spike's reaction would be it came as no surprise when he swung at her with a fist. She caught his arm shaking her head at him and she yelled, "We lost a friend tonight!"

"You know I wasn't in that raiding party!" Spike shouted back at Xander.

"And we may lose more!" Buffy cried at them, "The world may be sucked into hell..."

"You want our help," Xander growled scathingly, "just because Drusilla is a ho? Let take the opportunity to say how much I don't care!"

Spike looked Xander in the eye as he hissed, "You and the Slayer can't take them all by yourselves."

Xander let go of his arm with a shove. Knowing he was right stated softly, " I hate you."

"I'm all you've got." Spike told her tiredly.

***

"Thanks Oz," Cordelia said when Oz handed her a cup of coffee. They were all sitting in Willow's hospital room waiting for her to wake up. After taking a small sip of the coffee she set the cup aside. She picked up Willow's hand then leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Tentatively Willow opened her eyes, "Ohh, is.. Everyone...okay?"

Cordelia exchanged looks with Oz and Jonathan.

***

Spike and Buffy had eyed each other warily the whole walk to Buffy's house, much to Xander's amusement. Buffy Thought they needed to check on Willow and get some more stakes. Xander was about to comment on their staring contest when the door to the house was flung open and Buffy's mother ran out.

"Joyce!" Jessica Harris voice rang out, from just behind the older blond woman. Jessica appeared in the doorway and leaned against it. Joyce came up to Buffy and put her hands on her shoulders. She started to babble out questions at a pace that would have done Willow proud. Xander walked past them up to the porch to the door where her own mother stood.

"I told her, Xan-girl, I told her all about the Dale." Jessica said softly.

"About Buffy..."Xander started to asked but stopped at the head shake her mother did.

"No, that's for her to tell."

"Buffy!" Joyce cried more than a little panicked, "Terrible things happen in this town! What do you think your doing!"

Spike made a sound bring attention to himself before asking, "You still haven't told her yet?" He was worried because he had always liked Joyce.

"Who's this?"

"William."  
"Spike." Both Xander and Jessica said at the same time.

"Xander's boyfriend." Buffy stated with a smirk.

"Oh," Joyce looked at Buffy with a smirk of her own asked, "But I thought you and Xander were dating?"

That caused Jessica to break out into laughter, Buffy to turn bright red, and Spike to get a slightly gazed look across his face. Xander just covered her face with her hands, because really her mother should not be allowed to have friends, they started to get her sense of humor after awhile.

Suddenly vampire rushed onto the porch, Xander reacting grabbed him and swung him into the porch support beam, dazing him. Joyce let out a small scream at the sight of the monster and backpedaled into Buffy. Xander took the vampire by the neck and turned it so it was facing away from her and to her mother who plunged a stake into its heart. As it crumbled to ash Spike walked by the Slayer and her mother and up onto the porch. He looked down at the ashes saying, "One' of Dru's."

"It was waiting for you." Xander it was more of a question than a statement.

"Or you," Spike mumbled, "Or the Slayer."

"Buffy!"Joyce exclaimed looking stunned,"What is going on?"

Buffy sighed out, "I'm the Vampire Slayer."

Twenty minutes after that saw Xander, Spike and Buffy walking down the dark street away from Buffy's house. They had checked up on Willow, told Jessica that Giles was in Angelus 's hands, got the weapons they needed after which they beat a hasty retreat.

"She took that rather well, I thought." Xander said.

Buffy gave Xander a incredulously look, "Xan, I was lucky she didn't disown me!"

"She probably would have if Jessica hadn't been there?" Spike piped in.

Xander glare at the vampire before telling Buffy, "Well look on the bright side."

"And what can that be?"

"At least you won't get grounded for saving the world anymore."

***

Xander walked into the library she had left Buffy with Spike to head up to the Mansion, Xander knew Willow was going to try and do the soul spell again. Willow was stubborn like that, Xander knew. She ducked under the yellow crime scene tape and headed towards a back table. She glances down at he chalk out line where Kendra's body had been. On the table were candles and things from the interrupted spell. Xander reached up under the table and pulled out Kendra's large duffle bag. Then put it on the table as she was going through it he heard Snyder's voice, "You do know this is a crime scene, right? But then again you and that Summers girl are criminal, so really it's not a surprise to fine you here."

"We didn't do it." Xander stated, "and you know that, don't you?"

An unreadable look crossed the short man's face before he snarled out, "You're expelled!"

Xander shot him an uncaring look, then pulled out the blessed sword from the bag. Xander had been given a shit load of detentions, made to go through humiliating after school projects and had even blown up the high school but she had never been expelled before. A troubling feeling took root in the bottom of her stomach. Xander looked over the blade testing it's weight in her hand, the light shined over it and for a moment Xander thought it really was blessed by a 'higher being' rather than a blood ritual.

"Your point being," She asked absently to Snyder.

"I have you. Soon Summers will follow. You're scholastic careers in SunnyDale High are over."

As Xander walked by him she leaned the blade of the sword towards him, Snyder bent way from the blade nervously.

"Whatever," Xander mururrmed then slide past him, glancing back down at the chalk out line of the departed slayer. If Xander had looked back she would have seen Snyder pull out a cell phone.

***

Buffy stood in the shadows of the Mansion waiting for Xander. She took a deep breath, "I can do this," she said sadly.

***

 Xander got to Crawford Street she headed towards the Mansion with a determined pace. Jonathan came stumbling out of some bushes startling her.

"Jono, what are you doing here?"

But before the boy could answer Xander continued, "Never mind I think I know. Willow and the spell, right?"

Jonathan nodded.

"Okay, good, I guess." Xander still was not happy about the soul spell thing but was tired of protesting about something that she knew was going to happen no matter what, "Look I need you to do something." Xander explained what she wanted Jonathan to as he followed her down the street.

***

Angelus drew a dagger across the palm of his hand, after saying a chant was about to touch the statue of Acathla.  Spike and Drusilla stood a bit off to the side, watching him. When he heard the voice of the Slayer drawl, "Hello Lover," mockingly. He turned in time to see the Slayer decapitate a minion with the sword she was holding. Angelus sighed it had be one of the few smarter ones too.

"I don't have time for you," he told the blond girl angrily.

"That's funny," came Xander's smoky voice from the shadows, "you don't have much time left."

"The dynamic duo," Angelus sneered, "you really think, you two can take us all?"

"No," Buffy said seeing Spike come up behind the other vampire and pull a tire iron from the inside of his duster, he then whipped across Angelus back. Drusilla stepped back looking shocked at Spikes actions.

"We don't."  Xander finished. As Angelus cried out and fell to the ground, Spike kept smacking him with the tire iron. A minion thought this was a good time to attack the Slayer and Drusilla got over her shock began to growl making her way to Xander.

"Come on, Princess," Xander said when Drusilla stood in front of her, "Take your best shot!"

Drusilla threw a punch hitting Xander in the jaw and making her flinch. Xander brought a hand up to her face, to checked for blood. The corner of her mouth was bleeding a bit.

"Nice," Xander said looking at the blood, "My turn." Her eyes going a glowing green.

Drusilla backed up at the sight.

"Painful, huh?" Spike asked when he got done whaling on Angelus. He looked up to see Buffy get backhanded into a wall by her assailant and staggered into a chair. He also saw a dark haired boy rush forward hitting the vampire. Giving Buffy enough time to break the chair and from one of the legs to make a stake. She nodded her thanks to the boy; he turned and left, going to get the Watcher, Spike thought. He could see Xander throwing Drusilla into a wall. Now Spike was usually all for a good catfight but he knew Drusilla didn't play fair, then again, neither did Xander. Drusilla bounced off the wall and hit the ground hard. Spike went over to the two women quickly and told Xander, "I got her!"

Xander rolled her eyes at him and went to help Buffy, who had seen Angelus start to wake but was fighting other one of the minions and couldn't get to Angelus.

Drusilla slowly stood up staring at Spike as he told her, "I don't want to hurt you."

Drusilla growled at him and rushed him grabbing hi by the throat a forcing back against a nearby wall. He glared t her and slapped her arm away from him as he punched her in the face he said, "Doesn't mean I can't though."

***

Willow throw the stones on the make shift alter that Cordelia had made from the over the bed table.

Willow started to chant softly as Cordelia waved incense around the room.

****

Jonathan found the room where Giles was being kept and slow led him out of the Mansion; they paused for a moment to watch Xander and Buffy kick ass. Then Jonathan got Giles to the van where Jonathan knew Oz was waiting.

***

Angelus stood up shaking off the pain. He was so going to hurt Spike for this little betrayal. He started toward the statue. But stopped when Xander stepped in his way saying, "Oh, I so don't think so, Deadboy."

Angelus growled this girl was such a pain! Rushing toward her animal-like he grabbed her but instead of throwing her to the side he drove her back. No stopping until she hit the statue then he leaned down and whispered in her ear, "Did Giles ever tell you what would cause the statue to wake?"

Xander thought this was a strange question to ask while she struggled with him. He pulled her back by her shoulders and slammed her against the statue hard; one of the protrusions on the statues chest sank into to her left shoulder painfully enough to make Xander scream.

Buffy finished off her vampire in time to see Angelus throw Xander to the ground and pull the sword from the statue as it started to glow, the wind began to pick up as well. Blowing toward the statue of Acathla. She hear Angelus say with some glee to the downed dark haired girl, "A demon's blood opens the way," he grinned, "Now we know what *you* are."

"He comes..."Drusilla shouted pausing in her fight with Spike, to turn and look.

Spike took advantage of that coming up from behind her and hitting her in the temple nocking her out. Spike caught the vampiress before she hit the ground. Spike saw Xander standing near the opening statue but looked down at his goddess in his arm and muttered, "Sorry, Xan. You're on your own," He turned and ran from the room with Drusilla.

Xander watched as Buffy began to trade blows with Angelus, their sword fight like a beautiful if deadly dance. Xander really hopped Buffy could take Angelus because with her wounded shoulder their was now way she could hold a sword.

The fight took the tow combats all around the room. Xander dusted whatever minion got in the way. Soon the sword fighters were out in the atrium.

Buffy spun around and Angelus blocked her. The tip of her sword bounces off his and into the wall behind him; with a backhand punch he knocked her away from her sword. She slammed into a stone table knocking it over and she hit the ground with it.

"Well, well," Angelus mocked as Buffy crab crawled away from him, "No, weapons, no hope...take all that a way and really what do you have left?"

Buffy closed her eyes she knew Angelus was going to kill her so she steeled herself, but was surprised when the killing blow never came. Opening her eyes she saw Xander hit Angelus in the face knocking him back telling him, "She has me!"

The hit caused Angelus to drop his sword, he growl and grabbed Xander by her left arm and twist it around until they all could hear the crunch of her shoulder dislocating and her cry of pain. As the dark vampire snarl into Xander's face, "You just don't stop, do you?"

Buffy used Xander's distraction of Angelus to pick up his fallen sword. She got up and started forward.

Angelus saw this, tossed Xander away from him and per Xander's luck hit a wall and went down hard everything going black.

****

Spike sat in the Desoto he was about to started the engine. But paused, looking down at Drusilla one more time, he cursed did it again and got out of the car.

***

When Xander woke she stumbled to her feet it was in time to see, Buffy holding her sword above Angelus as he groaned in pain, throw back his head and screamed his eyes glowing red then white as the curse took him.  The whisper of Buffy's name was almost heartbreaking to hear.

"Where are we?" Angel asked confused.

"It worked," was all Buffy could say as she dropped her sword threw herself into Angel's arms.

"Oh, god, Buffy!" Angel whimpered as the things Angelus done slow came back to him.   
Buffy helped Angel way from the glowing vortex. Xander made her way to them as she wondered how she was going to close the portal a cockney voice grumbled from the side,

"Do they have to be so sickly sweet?"

Xander turned to see Spike walking past the vortex he stopped and picked up Angel's sword, the blessed sword.

"Spike." Xander said with a sigh, she thought Spike would have been long gone by now.

  
Spike glanced at Xander as she pulled her right hand from her left shoulder. It was cover, almost dripping in sweet smelling, bright red blood. She looked at the growing yellowish gold vortex in grow horror.

"A demon's blood open's the way." She whispered. "It was my blood that did this..."

Spike's grip tightened on the ornate pommel sword. He watched as Xander took a deep steadying breath, straighten her spine and take a step towards the vortex. Buffy and Angel realizes what she was about to do protested but Xander shook her head and took another step.  When Spike sudden grabbed her around the waist yanking her back from the portal.

"Spike what are you doing," Xander struggled in his arms, "I have ..."

"What you have to do is listen, Xander!" Spike said harshly in her ear. He sighed then, "I have never understood why you Scoobies are such a self sacrificing lot." He held up the sword by her, " Wipe your hand on it."

"Huh?" Xander said raising a hand.

"No, the bloody one! Now before we are all such in to hell."

Xander did as told. Spike drew back the now blood sword and threw it at the vortex. Everything seemed to slow down as they watched it turn end over end until it hit the vortex. As suddenly as if some one somewhere had snapped their fingers the vortex collapsed in on itself.

Xander turn to Spike asking, "How did you know?"

Spike shrugged,  "It's always about the blood, pet. Nothing says you have to give your life to give the blood."

***

Xander walked Spike to the Desoto. He had been kind enough, or mean enough, to put her shoulder back in place. They had left Buffy and Angel to their heartfelt reunion. Spike warned them not to shag again because he didn't want to go through all this again, for a third time.

Xander looked into the car and asked, "Where's  Dru?"

Spike took on a sheepish look, "In the trunk."

"She's going to be pissed."

Spike nodded, "I'll be in for some pain."

Xander smirked before saying, "You'll enjoy that."

"Yeah, I will." Spike said with a nodded, he paused opening the door, turning her looked intently at Xander before stepping away from the car and into Xander's space.

Spike kissed her.

Xander allowed it for a moment getting lost in the feeling before shoving him away from her, "You should go," she said shaking her head at him. "This is your second chance after all."

Spike looked at her for along moment, "Right," he nodded because Xander was right this was his second chance with his princess. He turned to get into the Desoto when he heard,

"Hey, Spike!"

He looked back at Xander.

"Don't forget to run over the welcome sign." Xander said and to her surprise Spike smile a real smile when he told her, "Do it just for you, pet."

Xander smiled back then head back to the Mansion.

****

Spike hit the 'Welcome to SunnyDale' sign on his way out of town just as he promised thinking of Xander as he did so.

_'A second chance_.' He thought grimly.

If this was his second chance. Why did it feel as if he was leaving his only chance behind?

***

Xander made her way through the busy bus station.

For the last week Xander had watch everyone coddle and coo poor Angel. Xander couldn't think about that. That would drive her, really would drive her crazy.  It angered her at how they all wanted to gloss over what happened. With the exception of Giles and her mother. Those two had tired to coddle Xander to death! She just couldn't handle it.  Xander knew her mother would find the note she had left on her bed. Knew her friends would get along without just fine for a few weeks. Just until she got her head together, until she got handle being in the same room as Angel. Without wanting to kill him. 

And the only person who could understand what she felt. What she was going through had left her.

Xander walked up to the ticket counter.

"Los Angeles, please."

 

 

 


	8. Interlude

  **Higher Realms**

The First Evil paced back and forth, shaking blond hair out of _'her'_ face. For the First still wore the blond slayers form.

"So we are in agreement?"

Jasmine, the bringer of peace, nodded, "It is a sound plan."

"Yeah, peace, great." Came the scathing comment, "That's right up there with Christmas and puppies."

The First Evil glared at the comment maker, "Just because you wear that form does not mean you must sound like him, Shadow!"

Shadow only smirked. He loved the fact he could make the First Evil Of All Mankind sound so put out just from one little comment. It was just great!

"The Hyena is in LA as we speak. I'm sure if we whispered in a certain law firms ear it can be taken care of." Shadow said.

"One of that sort of power turning to the dark would be a good thing for our side," Jasmine said thinking out loud.

"Fine do it. The Hyena would only hinder my plans..." the First stopped at the twin glares from the other powers, "... Our plans, of course."

"Harris as a knack for screw things up." Shadow grinned knowingly.

The First turned away from the other two, "The wheels of fate are turning in my favor. And not even the Prophecy Breaker will be able to stop me!"

****

**Back In SunnyDale**...

Jessica Harris sat slouched over her kitchen table a hand wrapped around a whiskey bottle, dressed in a white terry cotton robe, "I'm a bad mother," she moaned. She tried to protest when Giles yanked the bottle out of her hand. He looked at it and saw only a few drinks had been taken from it. He set it aside.

" Jessica," He said even as he thought, rolling his eyes, _'Save me from the Harris dramatics_.' "You are not a bad mother."

Jessica's head snapped up, "Don't you dare say Xander is a bad daughter!"

Giles shook his head suppressing a smile, "I wouldn't dream of it. Don't worry, I have a feeling that Xander will be back. This town needs her as do you and her friends."

"And you Giles?"

"Me too, Jessica."

****

"I can't believe Xander would run off like that!" Amy Madison said. She was sitting the park with Cordelia and Willow. She had been filled in about what happened with Acathla.

"Well, yeah, she did!" Cordelia snarled she hadn't had a good verbal fight with any one in days. Everyone else she tried it with would run off in tears. _Xander never had_ , Cordelia thought.

"Cordy! You know Xander..." Willow started.

But Cordelia jumped up, "No. I don't know anything! Because Xander ran off, rather than tell us what was wrong..."

****

Jonathan helped Oz load his van up for an out of town gig.

"So, you, me and Amy will do something together before you leave, right."

"Yep." Oz said.

"It looks like it's going to be hot this summer."

"Yep."

"Do you think Xander will be back?"

"Yep."

****

In the mansion on Crawford street, in the shadows of an atrium Buffy sat cuddled with Angel.

"I'll miss you." Angel told her.

Buffy smiled, "It will only before the summer. Besides I haven't seen my dad in a long time and L.A. is just a phone call away."

"About Xander..."

"No, Angel that wasn't you're fault! That was Angelus."

"But..."

"And if Xander would have _said_ something... Instead of leaving like that."

"Some times all you can do is leave." Angel said trying to get Buffy to understand. Because Angel did, he understood that Xander had left because of him.

Buffy just shook her head.

***

The sheet shifted as Spike reached for his cigarettes. He lit one and then after taking a long drag, exhaling he watched the smoke drift upwards. He heard Drusilla moan in her fitful sleep for Angel.

_'I miss Xander_.' Spike thought.

****

In L.A...

Xander chased a vampire into what looked like an empty parking lot. When the building appeared it gave her a pause... She followed after it inside...


	9. LA Song pt. 1

_Pretty girl on every corner_  
 _Sunshine turns the sky to gold_  
 _Warm, warm it's always warm here_  
 _And why can't I take the cold?_  
                -LA Song by Christian Kane  
                 

 

Xander growled as she chased a vampire through the alley. In the few weeks that she had been in LA, she had discovered it really was no different from the Dale. Vampires, Demons and a law firm that was run by Hell. That wanted her to come work for them, not withstanding. Because really that female lawyer that they sent... Lily.. Laney... Liliah... Whatever her name was, she was _truly_ scary. The vampire turned a corner; Xander followed and was surprised to see it disappear into an empty parking lot. It had disappeared into an empty parking lot, for Christ sake!  Xander didn't even think of stopping but ran straight onto the lot, it was weird when the building appeared but not all that odd. Which just showed how strange Xander's thought process really was. She came to a door over the top of it was a sign that read **_'Caritas'_** in very pretty writing. Next to the door was a box that said _**'no weapons, please**_.' She ignored the sign and started through the door but bounced off so barrier she couldn't see.

_Okay_.

She pulled the stake from out of her jacket tossing it in the box. Xander swore she hear the box chirp _**'thank you, kindly'** _ at her. When she tried going through the door this time there was no barrier baring the way. Xander froze in shock. It was a demon bar. It wasn't in it's self wasn't shocking, oh no, it was the fact that there was a Feral demon on a stage. It was singing. It was singing karaoke style. This was... This had to be...

With wide eyes Xander could only stare the Feral demon sang on par with Cordelia.

Which is to say... Very badly.

"It's true..."Xander muttered after making her way to the bar, "Amazing! Spike was telling the truth! This has to be Hell..."

A green demon, wearing a bright gold suit, who was leaning on the bar sighed as he dryly asked, "Why is it that very time a human stumbles into my little club, that is the first thing they say?"

"Those red eyes of yours, they don't make you see through rose colored glasses do they?" Xander asked.

The demon waved the glass he was holding around; Xander could smell the alcohol fumes as he replied, "Nah, that's the Sea Breezes."

Xander looked at the stage then back to the demon, muttering, "You could not get me drunk enough," she paused, "But certain spells on the other hand..."

"I'm Lorne, by the way. Owner and performer of Caritas." The demon said.

"So you..."

"I sing. I listen to demons and humans sing, mostly badly... Then I tell them about some for their future that I see when they sing...it's a cycle type thing."

"Yeah, okay, I'm Xander Harris."

Lorne blinked, that was a pretty famous name in the underworld. "The Hyena... I'm honored."

Xander cocked her head to the side, "You mean your not going to throw me out? I hunt demons after all."

Lorne shrugged, "If I threw out everyone who hunted demons I'd never talk to half of the interesting people that I have." He looked over her shoulder and saw a young man carrying a guitar through the crowd. "Look I have to introduce the next singer. We're in for a treat, he's pretty good." Lorne sighed as he pushed off the bar, "Don't go any where."

Xander was bemused as she watched him head to the stage where a dark blond haired man stood waiting. She turned to the bartender. He looked human if not for the fact he had way too many arms and asked for a drink.

"Ladies and Gentle Demons! I give you your favorite and mine... Lindsey MacDonald!"

Xander turned back toward the stage when she heard the low strains of the guitar, then in a low whiskey favored voice the man began to sing Allison Krause's 'It Doesn't Really Matter.' The pain and darkness in his voice touched something in Xander. This man knew what it was like to be alone, to he helpless but not weak. She wondered what had hurt him so badly. Xander shook her head to clear the thoughts it was unlike her to think like that. Especially about someone she'd never met. When his song was over the crowd applauded loudly and the man walked off stage. Lorne introduced the next singer. Xander put down her glass got up and left the bar. Caritas was an interesting place. She would have to go back again some time, she thought as she walked down the dark street. But right now she had to get back to her little one room apartment. Hopefully she could get a couple hours of sleep before going on shift at the dinner.

_Xander stood on the rooftop of her apartment building. She looked out over Los Angeles. The lights from the city made it look like a reflection of a clear night sky. Xander rubbed her  bare arms, at the slight breeze. She closed her eyes, and felt strong arms wrap around her. The scent of scent of cigarettes, whiskey and blood filled her senses._

_"How did you find me?"_

_"I'd find you anywhere you went, pet." A soft accented voice whispered._

_"Stay with me." Xander whispered begging._

_"I'll never leave," the voice harsh, dark and smoky in her ear._ _Xander turned in the man's arms and opening her eyes. It wasn't Spike who stood there but the man who had played the guitar at Caritas. He looked normal except for the gaping, ragged bloody hole in the middle of his chest. "_ _Not even if you tear my heart out."_

_She looked down in her the palm of her hand was a bloody human heart. She shrugged as if it was an every day thing to be holding a bloody human heart. Brought her hand up to her mouth then took a bite of it..._

Xander sat up with a groaning gasp. The sheets from her bed tangled around her waist. She wondered what the hell that was all about as a small shudder racked her body. Shaking her head to rid herself of the dream images. Got up and walked to the window. A car horn sounded and she sighed. There would be no more sleep.

***

It had been a busy day and being a waitress short at the diner had make things problematic. But Xander got though her shift. She just had to take one more order and she could leave. Which was just great because Xander hated the uniform she had to wear. She walked the to plates to a booth and put them on the table. The two male customers eyed her up but thankfully made no remarks. She asked them if, in a slightly bored tone, pulling out her order pad, they would like anything else. They didn't. So Xander tore off their bill and laid it on the table. Turning she walked past a nearby booth with a teenage girl who had long blond hair and wore gothic clothing that looked like they had seen better days. The boy who sat beside her had a slightly thuggish look to him. They were counting change and... They were the other waitresses, Peggy's problem, because Xander was done! She continued to the doors that lead to the kitchen. And thought about going to Caritas after patrol around her building. There had been quite a few vampires there around her building. Now there wasn't.

If Xander had taken that teenage couples order she would have been there to see a familiar blond haired slayer walk into the diner. Xander hadn't, so she didn't see the Slayer or learn about the teenage runaways who were being tricked into going to a demon dimension.

But the Slayer would.

***

When Lindsey MacDonald walked into Caritas that night he was a man on a mission. For the last week he had watched and waited. Tonight was the night! He had his guitar slung over his shoulder by the strap. He saw the dark haired young woman, that was his quarry, by the bar talking to Lorne. Good. That was good. It would make it easier to talk to her with Lorne there. He decided that now was as good as if was going to introduce himself as any. But how?

Aha, then he had it. As he walked over to where they were he pulled the guitar around in front of him and settled it in place, he began to strum a familiar tune. Stripped down it just the acoustics of it. He took a seat on a stool next to the young woman.

Then he began to sing...

_"I fine it very, very easy to be true... I find myself a lone when the day is through... Yes, I'll admit I'm a fool for you_ ," Lindsey batted his eyes mock flirtatishly at her causing her to laugh. You could never go wrong with Johnny Cash, Lindsey thought.  His miniature audience wasn't bowled over but he had gotten her to laugh and Lindsey thought that was important. He took it as a positive that they didn't break out the rotten fruit. But the improv performance had done its job and got her attention.

Lorne smiled indulgently at him and made him wonder what the Pylean had read in those few lines of song. Lindsey shrugged it off and turned to the person that had caused him to use the whole little show as an icebreaker, now he needed to see if it worked.

"It seems you have an admirer Lorne, lucky you." The young woman told the green demon.

Lorne chuckled.

Lindsey though said, "Actually as much as I admire our esteemed host here, the song was for you, darlin'." His soft southern accent showing its roots. He then sat back and waited for what she would say in reply. He was interested to see if she could match wits with him. He liked smart people.

"Your in a bar full of beautiful and exotic demons. And you pick _me_ to serenade? You have no taste what so ever, do you?"

Okay, so Lindsey liked smart-ass people too.

"Well, they do say 'like calls to like' and in my case- what's not to like?" Lindsey shot back mirth dancing in his eyes.

She turned to Lorne, disbelief plain on her face, and asked, "Is he for real? No body gets anywhere with lines like that!"

Lorne tilted his head then asked Lindsey, "I don't know? Are you for real Lindsey?"

Lindsey snickered, seeing out of the corner of his eye that his quarry was amused in spite of herself with their verbal spar an now it his byplay with the anagogic demon,  "And were you expecting to get 'anywhere', Lindsey."

"I don't know about getting anywhere but being a real live boy, that I most certainly am." Lindsey replied teasingly.

At the 'real boy' bit Lorne choked on his Sea Breeze. Wheezing bit he said with a laugh, "Linds, somehow I don't think you and Pinocchio are exactly a good comparison material - remember he had to _stop_ lying to achieve a semblance of life."

Lindsey pouted, "Lorne, you wound me!"

"Oh, stuff it you reprobate. You are defense lawyer, telling the truth and nothing but the truth isn't in the job description, is it?" Lorne interrupted him.

"Well, yes, that's true. But you don't have to be quite so down on me about it." Lindsey huffed theatrically.  "It's an honest profession, if not one that requires me to be honest in practice!" He paused for a moment then said, "Wait..."

After the girl he had been trying to impress stopped laughing, she took a deeply needed breath and said, "Xander Harris," as an introduction, "So, you're a lawyer, huh?"

"Yeah, and it's a dirty job. But you know how it goes someone has got to do it. Lindsey MacDonald," He returned then reached out and took her hand form the bar, bringing up to his lips, lightly brushing her knuckles with them as he finished with, "It's a real pleasure to make your acquaintance."

Xander pulled her hand away while rolling her eyes. Trying not to be charmed by the blond, blue-eyed man, said, "That's because you don't know me..."

_Yet_ , was all Lindsey thought with a small smile.

***

Over the next couple of weeks Lindsey went to Caritas after work and more often then not Xander would be there. They had many a debate and a wide range of conversations that went something like this...

"...So, how did you learn about, well, this world?" Lindsey asked waving a hand around the bar in general.

Xander raised an eyebrow at him, "It starts the way very story does...with a girl..."

Lindsey waited but Xander said no more on the subject, so he shrugged and bought her another drink.

***

"... Sports?" Xander shook her head and knocked back a shot of Jack Daniels,  "Never into them. Unless... Does beating up football players count?"

***

"Best movie ever?" Xander asked.

Lindsey looked thoughtfully for a moment, knowing that this was an important question.

"Star Wars?"

"Best out of the three..."

***

Lorne stood by the bar, he wasn't eavesdropping, at least that's what he told himself, but the laughter from the lawyer and the dark haired girl was infectious. The demon customers when more incline to sing happier songs. Even if they sung them badly...

"...Why would Billie Idol steel a vampire's look?" Lindsey asked confused because really that look was so...

Xander shrugged, and downed another shot of whiskey, "...Cause the vamp in question, that he stole it from... Is like really sexy, but as annoying as hell!"

"You think vampires are sexy?" Came the disbelieving inquiry.

Xander scrunched up her face in a way, Lindsey thought that was cute, and said, "Mmm, no. Just Spike." She blinked, looked down at her glass, "...And if can admit that I've had way too many of these..."

***

"You work at a diner?"

"Yes, it's honest work and better than some of the other stuff I was approached with was..." Xander said darkly.

"But a diner? Man, there is no way you would ever catch me in one of those dives in that area - not without a drugs or a massive spell inducement."

"So, you won't be hitting me up for free meals, I take it?" Xander said with a laugh.

Lindsey just shot her a horrified look.

***

"High school..." Lindsey asked.

Xander blinked, and her normally expressive face went unreadable at the question, "Pass," was all she said to that.

***

Lindsey had a conversation with Lorne...

"I've never met anyone like her. She's smart, funny, beautiful..." Lindsey sighed, "There's something wrong with her isn't there?"

"Well, you did met her here." Lorne said with a laugh. He had never seen the slick lawyer so thrown by any one before. Then he turned serious as he said, "Enjoy the time you have with Xander."

Lindsey frowned, he knew that tone, it was the tone some used when they trying to tell you that the person you're seeing just isn't right for you, without actually saying that. He was a lawyer so he knew that tone damn well. Lorne didn't say anything else but gave Lindsey a steady look before going to introduce the next singer.

***

"...And that is why a vampire with a soul, should not be trusted around young, impressible blonde girls, they go insane and try to suck the world in to hell...." Xander said, telling Lindsey an abbreviate version about the slayer's romance.

Lindsey only half believed this story, because really the vampire slayer had been made to kill vampires. Literally.

"...Well, kiddies," the Host's smooth voice flowed over to the corner table were most of Lindsey's conversation with Xander took place, "it's nearly dawn and were closing..."

"What?!" Xander said and grabbed Lindsey's wrist looking at his watch, "I have to be at work in three hours!"

***

Those had been the conversations he had enjoyed the most. Then there had been work, and normally Lindsey loved his job. He also knew he was very good at it. You didn't make Associate at his age and not be.

"I know something, you don't know..." the sing-song came for door way of his office, the professional, stylishly dressed brunette, Lilah Morgan leaned there. She was the other associate and his worst enemy in the law firm.

Lindsey leaned back in his chair, "And what can that be?"

"I know there is a new power in town."

"So do most of the demons in town, not news Lilah."

"I know that the Senior Partners want this power..."

Lindsey rolled his eyes. All that the Senior Partners wanted was power.

"This power," Lilah's smile turned into a shark type smile, "Is that brunette, and can I say I really thought you would have gotten farther with her by now, you've been making time with at Cartias."

Lindsey just glared at her.

***

Lindsey slipped into the cheap vinyl booth and propped his brief case on the bench beside him with a grimace. God, this place... But anything had to be better than being back at the office. Once Lilah had left he had done some research.

_**The Hyena**_ , _**the Prophecy Breaker**_...was Xander Harris. The girl whose stories about a hell of a town were all true it seemed. At least that's what the files Wolfram and Hart's Archive had produced. His boss, Holling Manners, had told him that he was now the best hope W &H had to bring the Hyena into the fold. They had sent Lilah at first with an offer. To work as a cleaner, which was a nice word for _assassin._ Xander had refused Lilah telling what she and the law firm could do with the offer. Graphically. Lilah, Lindsey could tell, had been impressed with Xander. But angry at the refusal. Lilah took such things as a personal failure. He toyed with the silverware on the table. As he snuck a surreptitious look around while he waited to be served. The Formica, nickel and vinyl had all seen better days. Lindsey hoped he had remembered the schedule right; because there was no other reason he would willingly subject himself to anything like this otherwise. Slightly scuffling of soft-soled shoes approached his booth and a very bored version of the voice he had come to crave hearing asked, "So, what can I get ya? Anything to drink to start with?"

Lindsey looked up and smiled blindingly and said in a playfully suggestive tone, "That's not how it goes, I thought you were suppose to say 'could you help me'?"

Xander started then actually, her mind coming out of zombie mode and, seeing just who was in the booth. She grinned wryly and slouched into a hipshot pose of waitress's all over the world used. It should not have been sexy, not with that ugly cotton candy pink uniform, or how tired she looked, but somehow it was.

"Linds, there is no help for you, besides that's the sales industry not the food. Also if I remember correct you said the only way you would step foot in here was if you had been drugged or bespelled into a stupor, which is it?"

"I'm dreadfully ill." Lindsey said with a straight face but his eyes were dancing in amusement, "Sick with longing for you. It made me come here, I couldn't resist!"

Xander snorted, sometimes she just couldn't believe what would come out of his mouth. Not even Spike could come up with lines that cheesy. She frowned then and wonders if Spike was happy. She shook her head, saying to Lindsey, "Yeah, huh-huh, how about the real reason now."

"Seriously, I wanted to see you and tonight at Caritas was to far away." Lindsey said simply, and because he wanted to be able to reconseal the girl he had come to know with the powerhouse he had read about in the W&H files. He couldn't see it.

"Oh," Xander said glancing away that was kind of sweet. She could admit, "Well, you're here...seeing me..."

"I am, aren't I?" Lindsey said with a smile. "But I suppose I have to let you get back to work so you *can* meet me at Caritas tonight. I have to get back to the office soon myself, anyway. How about you bring me the most descent thing on the menu to go and I'll see you late -dose that sound fair?"

Xander nodded and walked off to the kitchen area and told the grill cook what to make. One of the other waitresses, Peggy, a blonde women with teased hair and assets that got the most tips, smirked at Xander as she said, "Lucky you, Xan. To get the prettiest thing to walk in here today."

Xander rolled her eyes, "Peggy, that pretty thing came here to see me."

Peggy just pouted, "Some girls get all the luck."

Xander was still groaning about that when she carried the take out cartons over to Lindsey's table. "Here," She said shoving them at him, "The only thing truly edible on the menu and at the bargain price of 9.95 too."

Lindsey pulled out a twenty and tucked it into her hip pocket. He stood and gathered his things, including the food she had brought him, "Here I'll expect you to buy the first round tonight."

Xander smiled impishly, "That's what you think, bucko!" And without giving him a chance to parry that, she spun away.

Lindsey watched her go admiringly, before leaving the diner. He walked around the corner where his car was parked next to a waste can. He dumped the food in the can and got in the car. He had plans to make.

 

_Streets littered with diamonds_   
_Everyone's glistening_   
_This whole world shines so brightly_   
_And I can't see a thing..._

        -LA Song Christian Kane.

 

On a lone length of Texas highway, a young brunette walked. She knew, that she was only a few steps ahead of a gruesome fate. She hoped when she got to SunnyDale that the current slayer and her watcher,  that her own watcher had spoke so highly of the group of people that protected the hellmouth. She hoped they would help her...

***

On a dark, dirty street in Rio, Spike watched as his princess, his dark goddess walk away from him, the Chaos demon she had been messing with, on her heels.

Some second chance this turned out to be.

He'd had enough of catering to her mad whims.

Spike was going to go _home._

To SunnyDale...

***

Cordelia's trip to the Cayman Islands got cut short due to monetary problems that her parents would fight about only behind closed doors. She did take Willow shopping for a new school clothes. Amy had gone with, Jonathan being dragged along as a packhorse. Oz was in LA for a summer gig. They told Cordelia all about the lessons they were taking on line from Jenny Calendar via e-mail. Jenny was they told her getting back in touch with her roots....

***

Jessica was cooking.

At least Giles thought that was what she was doing, if the way she was slamming pots and bowls around. He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist and murmured into her ear...

"Marry me?"

Jessica sighed. He had been asking for the last couple of weeks. And while she hadn't said no, she hadn't said yes either.

"Ask me again when Xander comes home."

Now it was whom Giles sighed and said softly, "Jess, we can't put our lives on hold because Xander is not here."

Jessica nodded, "I know... Just give me some more time?"

Giles knew he would give the woman in his arms the moon if she wanted it. So it was easy for him to say, "All of it in the world."

***

Angel sat in the dark shadows of the garden, at the mansion and brooded about things.

***

At Caritas, Lindsey was gathering his courage...

"So, I got these tickets, it's to this battle of the bands type thing...on Friday" Lindsey said as he took a drink of his beer. He and Xander were sitting at what Lindsey had come to think of as their table.

"What bands?"

"Oh, hmm, Within Temptation... Uh, Nerf Herder I think and Darling ...something."

"Huh."

"Oh, yeah!" Lindsey said just remembering, "and a band called Dingoes Ate My Baby."

Xander made another non-commenting noise.

"So..." Lindsey said looking down at his beer, "You want to go...with me?"

Xander paused, her shot glass frozen half way to her mouth., "You mean like a _date?"_

Lindsey nodded still not looking at Xander because he really didn't want to see her reject him. He wasn't good with rejection, really he wasn't.

"Okay, sure."

Lindsey jerked up his head, "Really?"

Xander nodded, "Yeah, I'd like to hear them again."

"Hear who?"

"The Dingoes."

"Oh, you've heard them before?"

Xander gulped down her drink, "You could say that..."

Lindsey waited for her to elaborate on the subject. She didn't instead she asked what time the concert was, and where it was going to be held.

***

It was two days before Xander's date with Lindsey, and she was sitting at the bar in Caritas.

Date...Yeah, that surprised Xander too. Xander knew that Lindsey was attracted to her. Her heighten senses picked that up the first time they met easily. What had surprised her was the way they had clicked. Lindsey was interesting...He was smart, funny, stylish, a professional, confident.  He was very thing Xander _hadn't_ been as a guy. So really, Xander should _hate_ the man. But she didn't. She _liked_ him. She liked him a _lot._

"Sweet Pea, you look down." Lorne said from over her shoulder. He came and sat down on the stool next to her. "Tell Uncle Lorne what's wrong."

Xander looked at him for a long moment before saying, "Okay," then proceeded to unload every thing from before the _'do-over'_ and Spike, then Angelus and the Slayer, to this confusing thing that was developing with Lindsey.

All Lorne could say was, "I'm glad you never sang for me. That would have made my head explode," he shook his head, "Sweets, you need to look at your own actions during the Angelus thing. You did throw the orb that would have gotten his soul back, sooner.

Xander nodded, "That was petty, and immature. I can see that now. But he..."

"Acted like a vampire?"

"What he did to Spike..."

"Angelus is a master vampire, Spike is a childe of the line. He did as his instincts told him to, he had to cow Spike's rebelling against him."

"So I should for give him? Puppies and kittens all around?"

Lorne shook his head, "Hell, no, child! Hate _Angelus_ all you want. That's a healthy reaction for what happened to you. But remember that _Angel,"_ Lorne said stressing the different name, "Was not the one who did those things to you and Spike. And that Angel is suffering to."

Xander sighed, "I know that. In my head... But..."

"No one should expect you to be the picture of perfect mental heath. And that was even before your torture by Angelus. The whole reliving everything has got to be stressful enough. Some times I think the PTB's want the impossible." Lorne told Xander.

Xander snorted a laugh out. Lorne just smiled sadly as the girl asked about Lindsey.

***

The concert had been loud; full of screaming teens and young adults, beer had flowed like water. Xander liked all the bands he had heard and had really enjoyed Nerf Herder signature guitar rift that for some reason all ways reminded Xander of Buffy when she was really into slaying zone. And that band with the cello player was cool too. Seeing Oz in his element had been sweet. Lindsey had used the loud music as a reason to press as close as he could and speak into her ear. If his hands just happened to roam around her waist. Xander was okay with that. Xander wanted to find out if what was between them was what she thought it was...

It had started to rain by the end of the show.

Xander was humming a tune of the last band as she walked with Lindsey up to his building. She had told him she only lived a couple blocks away and she could walk home. Because Xander knew enough from his girls that you didn't invite a guy to your place. You had to have a safe place in case it went south. Lindsey though hadn't like the ideal of her walking home and offered to call her cab. So he invited her up to his apartment to wait for it. The rain was coming down in buckets. They were half way up the walk to the apartment building when four vampires attacked them. Xander knew these were minions and that they were young and hungry. One of them grabbed Lindsey throwing him to the side separating him from Xander, as the other three surrounded Xander, it advanced on Lindsey backing him toward the building. Lindsey was not one you could ever call a fool, he knew what was out in the dark. It had taught him to be prepared, and he pulled out a stake from an inside pocket on his coat. He had a death grip on it as the vampire attacked him in full force. He then got lucky and the vampire zigged, and Lindsey zagged staking it in the heart.

Xander looked at the dust flowing down to the ground as she smirked at the last two, the first one she staked had been all to easy. She had just seen Lindsey stake his vamp and strangely it didn't seem like the first time he had done that she would have to ask him about it later.

"Two against one, now those are better odds." Xander taunted the surviving vamps as she stood in the pouring rain. Drawing their attention away from Lindsey to herself. Vamp One threw a punch at her and she blocked it, kicking him away from her. Xander decided to end this quickly and morphed into her demon form, forgetting about Lindsey as she lost her self in the fight. Vamp Two, growled and attacked with a crest kick, Xander just grabbed his ankle and yanked him off his feet before staking him. After Vamp Two's dusting enraged Vamp One and he charged her, knocking them both to the wet ground, Xander simply rolled them over until she was on top straddling the vamp, she grinned savagely as she shoved the stake through the vampire's heart.

Xander stood panting. Lindsey could only stare in awe at the beautiful demoness that stood were a pretty human girl had. She had long hip length hair that started out black-brown until it hit her chin then turned a lighter almost dark blonde-brown with darker brown spots running through it. Sharp-clawed hands, covered in fur the same color and pattern as her hair up to her elbows. Her eyes were a glowing demonic green and fangs that just as dangerous as the vampires they had fought. He asked softly, just to make sure,

"Xander?"

Xander blinked, and pushed a lock of hair out of her face. It was then that she noticed her hands, clawed and furred... Slowly she started to back away. She hadn't told Lindsey about this... Some things about the Dale, yeah, sure but not _this..._ The rain was obscuring her vision some but not enough to hide the awed and slightly fearful look Lindsey was giving her. For the second time since the primal made herself such a part of Xander's life did she feel shame for what she was, "No, don't..."

_Don't what_? Lindsey wasn't sure. Don't look? Scream? Run? He could see her emotions plainly across her face and knew when Xander was about to bolt. He made a decidsion surging forward and grabbed Xander by both arms, pulling her to him. He slammed his lips on Xander's heedless of the sharp fangs. His actions so surprised Xander that she gasped and allowing Lindsey to thrust his tongue into her mouth and twine it around Xander's.

***

_She's pretty as a picture_   
_She's like a golden ring_   
_Settles me with love and laughter_   
_And I can't feel a thing._

       -LA Song by Christian Kane

 

After making out in the rain for a while, Lindsey and Xander entered his apartment. Xander, now in her normal human form, Lindsey shut the door.  He grabbed her around the waist turning, pressing Xander against the wall next to it. Xander knew what was going to happen, what she wanted to happen with him...Sex.

Sex with Lindsey.

It was something she had been thinking about for a while now. Xander missed sex. Xander had always had a healthy sex life in the _'before'_  and well, the wants and needs were healthy. Xander's past partners...may not have been the healthiest for him. But Xander was a sexual being even more so since Shakarri became such a part of her life. She knew she wanted Lindsey.

Lindsey, used his body to pin her to the wall as his hands buried themselves in her long wet hair, he kissed her again. He pulled back to take a breath, shrugged out of his coat, then returned his mouth to hers before peeling off her jacket. He slipped one of his hands under her t-shirt and caressed the underside of her breast. His hips rubbed and thrust against her stomach, his want of her so painfully obvious. His mouth strayed from hers to her jaw then to her neck. Making her moan softly.

Xander yanked Lindsey's shirt out of his pants and pulled it over his head, dropping it to the floor. Her hands trailing up his chest slowly then over his shoulders and down his back. He ran both hands over her sides, down her thighs then gripped them hard as he picked her up; she wrapped both legs around his waist. He kissed her again and turned sharply, making her squeak in surprise, as he made his way to his bedroom. Stopping in the doorway, Lindsey asked her breathlessly, "We don't have... We can stop..." Xander yanked his head back down to hers and kissed him again in answer, one that Lindsey took for a yes.

****

~ **Unknown Demon Realm** ~

Buffy swung the small axe at the demon. Cutting it in half.  She had learned from the couple she met in a diner that street people were going missing or turning up dead. With the help of Lily, who was once Chanterelle. And Lily's boyfriend Rickie about the blood bank that was being used as a lure to bring people to a demon dimension. Buffy had also found papers that indicated that a law firm was involved too. Two demon guards pause as they watch their boss be cut down by a small blonde female human.

"Who are you?"

Buffy just smirks and throws the axe at the demon that spoke; the axe lodged itself in the demon's head.

"I'm the Slayer!"

***

Lindsey looked down at the woman in his bed. He had been surprised to find out that he was her first. That she had been a virgin. From the files Lindsey had thought for sure that the vampire called Spike had that honor. But it seemed he hadn't in fact. Xander looked so beautiful, sleeping the sleep of the well sated. Lindsey sighed as he left the bed, naked he padded over to where his pants were and picked them up. Reaching into a pocket he pulled out his cell phone. He looked out the window of his bedroom then dialed a number.

When there was an answer Lindsey said softly, "Stage one is complete." Then he hung up the phone and crawled back into bed with Xander and wrapped an arm around her waist. But it was a long time before he fell a sleep.

*****

Xander woke up pleasantly sore and happy, if not a little freaked. Sex was _way_ different from this side. Multi-orgasms a side. Everything Xander had been used to happening in just one area now happened all through out her body. It had been strange but not bad. And Xander could see herself doing it again, and again. And definitely with Lindsey. She got out to the bed and once dressed looked back at the bed Lindsey was still asleep. Leaving the bedroom she walked into the living room through that to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. Xander was starving. She found eggs and bacon. That would have to do she thought. She was almost done cooking the eggs when a pair of arms wrapped around her waist, causing her to jump as a voice whispered sleepily in her ear, "You cook?"

Xander looked down at the pan, "Well, it's kind of hard to ruin scrambled eggs. Unless...you're Buffy. She should never be let near a stove."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, she burnt water."

"Don't you mean boiled water?"

Xander shook her head, "No, I meant burnt. Still haven't figured out how she did it...?"

"Well, the eggs smell good." Lindsey said as his hands began to roam over her stomach, sides and hips.

Xander glanced over her shoulder, Lindsey's scent was intoxicating, and it was caramel and whiskey, along with a hint of something else...

"Uh, Xan..."

"Hmmm?"

"I think the eggs are burning?"

Xander looked back down at the pan at the almost blacken eggs and the start of smoke.  
   
"Crap!" Xander said as she jerked the pan off the stove eye then sighed, "I don't think I should be allowed near one either."

Lindsey just laughter huskily in her ear and said, "Here let me show you how it's done." He dumped the burnt eggs in the trash and proceeded to make breakfast. After they had eaten and the dishes were done and drying, Xander leaned against the sink. This was the part Xander hated, the part that was always so awkward.

"I should..." Xander started to say, but Lindsey spoke over her, "It's still raining."

Xander listened carefully and she could hear the rain tapping on the windows in the living room.

"So, it is." Xander whispered softly.

"You could stay?"

"Well, my hair," Xander said reaching up to finger a lock of it, "just got dry..."

Lindsey stepped closer to Xander.

"...And I really hate getting it wet..."

"Yeah?" Lindsey asked with a slight smirk as he used his arms to box Xander in against he sink, he pressed closer to her. He swooped down and kissed her. Lindsey didn't have the dark fire that Spike did in his kiss, or touches but it was knowing and needful. It was so different being kissed like this...Soft but passionate. Xander hands slide up and around his neck. It was odd. Lindsey was taller than...Xander stopped that thought in its tracks. Kissing Lindsey, being with Lindsey was so different from how it had been with Spike. Xander never had sex with Spike for one. And didn't know if she ever would. But with Lindsey she knew.

Lust and passion.

Without the underlining darkness and possessiveness that was with her relationship with Spike. Xander was sure she could live without the darkness. The lust and passion of a human man was a heady thing, really.

When Lindsey finally pulled away to let them both breath, Xander said, "Well this and last night was..." But stopped the insulting remark dead on her tongue. This was not Spike, the wariness she saw in Lindsey's slightly darker blue eyes, and she was such a sucker for blue eyes, proved that, "...Not disappointing, at all."

Lindsey blinked, "Well, that's not the best compliment I've ever gotten. Sadly though it's not the worst either," Lindsey sighed, "I guess a guy has to take what he can get."

"So I should?" Xander asked again.

"You should stay." Lindsey repeated.

"Okay," Xander said, "But whatever shall we do on such a rainy day?" It was asked in a playful tone.

Lindsey grinned and tightens his arms around her, "I'm sure we'll think of something..."


	10. LA Song pt. 2

The next few weeks were great. Lindsey was very thing a good human boyfriend should be. He took Xander to movies, concerts, dinners and nights talking at Caritas. And sex, a lot of sex. Things were good between them and for Xander up until the day Lilah Morgan pulled up in a limo next to her as she was walking back to her apartment after work one night. As the lady lawyer leaned out the window Xander told her, "I refuse your offer once and I did it nicely. Go a way."

"You threaten to rip my spine out."

Xander nodded, "Ahh! But I _said_ it nicely!"

It was not something Lilah could argue because Xander _had_ said it nicely.  The limo stopped when Xander did. She sighed and asked, "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to tell you that the offer was still open. And..."

"I'm not working for Wolfram&Hart. Period."

Lilah nodded, "Okay, then let's talk about something else."

Xander got a confused look on her face, "What could you possible want to talk to me    
about." But Xander knew she wanted something.

"Oh, I don't know? How about...are you seeing anyone?" Lilah asked in the same tone Buffy or Willow would. It made Xander tense because the last thing she wanted was for Lindsey to come to the attention of the hell run law firm.

Lilah held up a manilla folder, "This is interesting reading."

Xander growled, "Stay was from Lindsey!"

"Oh! I was so _hoping_ it was like this!" Lilah said with a dark laugh, "It's just too _good!"_

"What are you talking about?"

Lilah held the folder out the window, "Why don't you read it for yourself?"

For a moment Xander debated the morals of reading the file because W&H was know for being through in all it's business. But knew she had to know in order to protect Lindsey. Xander shrugged and snatched the file from Lilah's hand. She opened it and flipped through it. It had the name of his parents and the hospital he was born in the name of the town. The school she went to, the names of his next girlfriends and surprisingly one boyfriend just before going into law school. Top marks in school all of them. Employed currently by Wolfram and Hart...Considered to _be...Wait? What?!_ Xander backed up a line and read it. **Employed by Wolfram and Hart**. Xander looked up at Lilah she wore a sympatric look.

"Men are such liars, aren't they?" Lilah barely caught the folder before it hit her in the face. Lilah smirked as she watched the girl walk away. _There was no way Lindsey was going to talk his way out of that_ , she thought. Lilah so loved it when she got the better of Lindsey, and it could only get better. Her only regret was that she wouldn't be there when the Hyena tore his heart. Xander seemed like the kind of girl who would do that.

***

Lindsey heard the pounding on his apartment door. He left got up from the sofa leaving behind a bunch of papers that were fro a case on the coffee table.  Lindsey opened the door, "Xander?" The brunette pushed past him, walked into the living room and stopped near the fireplace, she then turned to look at him. She opened her mouth to speak then closed it just as quickly. She started to pace then back and forth like a caged hyena.

"Tell me it's not true," Xander whisper when her back was to him. Lindsey stopped closer to the fireplace as he placed his hand on the mantle near a small tin. "That you work for Wolfram and Hart." Xander stated flatly when she turned around.

Lindsey frowned, "Who told you that?"

"Lilah Morgan." Xander said as she continued to pace.

"I see," Lindsey said as he faced the fireplace.

"Just say it isn't true!" Because damn it! Things had been good for Xander, it was just her luck something like this would happen. It had to be a lie because Lindsey would have told her...wait, he hadn't told her the name of the law firm he worked for and Xander had never asked. But still...that was something that should have come up in their conversations and it hadn't. Xander realized. In fact Lindsey would always turn the conversations way from that topic.

"I can't..."

Xander jerked around at that, "Wh - " she tried to ask but got a face full of pinkish-white powder thrown in he face, she inhaled a breath.

"I can't say it's not true..." Lindsey told Xander as her world began to go fuzzy around the edges.

What had he done? What had he hit her with...She coughed and sputtered...

"...Wolf..."

Xander's eyes sight went blurry...

"...wouldn't  understand..."

Loud. Everything was so loud.

"...wish you...but..."

Xander's knees went weak and she could feel herself falling...

"...forgive me..."

Xander blinked and wondered why Lindsey was asking for forgiveness. Then she wondered why she was here with Lindsey when she should have been...

Lindsey caught Xander before she could hit the floor. He swung her up into his arms and carried her to his bedroom. Stripped her of her clothes and cover her up. Then went back into the living room. Cleaned up the powder that was on the floor. Walked back over to the sofa and sat down and picked up a file. He would join Xander in a little while after he had finished.

By morning Xander will have forgot why she had come to his apartment in the first place.

***

Xander woke up alone.

She woke up alone in Lindsey's bedroom; she must have spent the night. Strange she couldn't remember coming to Lindsey's place but she must have... She pulled up the sheets around her protectively then called out, "Lindsey?"

There was no answer. Xander looked around the room, she was naked under the sheets, she didn't remember how she got here and now Lindsey was not answering her...Then she saw it on the nightstand next to the bed.  She sighed in relief and reached out for a note that was leaned against the lamp.

***

_Xander woke up alone_...

She pulled up the sheets around her then called out, "Linds?" Buffy's words...telling how she woke alone after... Specters of a past that had no bases for now or with Lindsey, still the words haunted Xander.

***

_There was no answer_...

Xander reached out for the note leaning against the lamp. It was Lindsey's writing, telling her that she had come to his apartment with a small head jury but that he had kept a close eye on her and that it had healed during the night.

***

_Xander woke up alone..._

 

_Xander woke up alone..._

 

_Xander woke up alone..._

***

"The powder." Lindsey said in reply to his boss's question, feeling slightly sick at what he had been doing. But knew if he hadn't she would have left. Would have left him. "Works like a dream."

"So she's ready to come work for us?"

Lindsey looked away and murmured, "Not yet."

***

_Xander woke up alone..._

***

Xander walked into the courthouse, she had decided to surprise Lindsey and met him here instead of the diner, for lunch. But recess hadn't been called yet, she saw Lindsey from her spot in the back of the room as she leaned against the wall. Lindsey was defending a real scumbag, one that had made the news for the way he had killed those children the way he did. Xander watched as Lindsey cunningly turned most of the evidence back on the other person, or got it dismiss from the case. It was strange, she could feel it in the air, it got just like it did when Lindsey would sing at Caritas, but different too. In Caritas it was low and seductive barely there at all, but here, in the courtroom the power crashed around wildly. Xander had an idea of what was happening, the dark almost oily power about made her sick. She managed to keep her cool long enough to lean to the closes person and ask in a whisper, "How can that lawyer defend that scum bucket? They caught him red-handed-literally! He can't except to win, can he?"

The answer she got from the old man she had asked was, "He's Wolfram and Hart. They are the ones who give truth to the Faustian deal - because I haven't seen a lawyer from that firm lose a case, yet. And I've been watching court cases from this courthouse on and off for over fifty years now."

Xander blinked and her stomach rolled unsteady as she slipped out of the room. Her head began to pound, there was something....She knew there were deals like that made -all the time.

_This must be how Buffy felt_ , Xander thought. Was Lindsey really just her version of Angelus? Only that she hadn't caused him to lose his soul, now had she? Xander had to wonder if Lindsey ever had it to begin with...because to see this unknown side of him was shocking, to realized that she had shared so much of herself with someone who could have sold their soul like that?  What could have Wolfram and Hart offered Lindsey for it. And what had Lindsey need so badly that he would have sold it? That talent of Lindsey's, he probably thought Wolfram and Hart gave it to him. But thanks to Giles, Xander knew Lindsey more than likely had it already. Wolfram and Hart just taught him how to hone it and use it for their gain.

_Wolfram and Hart..._ Xander thought with a snarl. _Always goddamned Wolfram and Hart!_ Xander knew of them from the 'Before' because Cordy had kept Willow posted about some events that happened until her death. Xander hadn't had any dealings with them until Africa. Xander could still recall the arrogant look, the slick and sure way the lawyer was convinced that Xander would deal with them.

***

_Xander had woke up alone, again._

_***_

Xander sat in Caritas near the bar, it had been two days since she had last seen Lindsey. She knew he was keeping something from her; she just wasn't sure what it was. Too many times she had woke up in Lindsey's bed, without memory of how she got there. But there was always a note on the nightstand that gave a perfectly reasonable reason...head jury...too much to drink...Things that should have made sense. But for some reason just didn't.

"Sweety? You're not looking so good." Lorne said from over her should, and no Xander didn't. She looked pale, and was kind of jittery.

Xander looked at him, "Can we talk privately?"

Lorne gave a startled looked look but nodded, "This way."

Xander followed as he walked behind the bar and into a backroom.

"Now tell me what's wrong."

Xander shocked him by beginning to sing, " _Well, it's not hard to see,_ _anyone who looks at me..."_

Lorne saw...

**Xander talking to Lilah Morgan.**

**Xander and Lindsey arguing in front of a fire place**.

**Lindsey throwing white powder in Xander's face**.

**Lindsey arguing with a man in front of the Wolfram and Hart building**.

**Xander and Lindsey talking on the sofa in Lindsey's apartment**.

**Xander standing over a demon's corpse.**

**Xander with Lindsey, happy moments always over shadowed... Xander standing over a human corpse, Lindsey holding his arm to his chest, it's bleeding...**

**Xander sitting in a courtroom, Lilah Morgan besides her talking to the jury in her defense...**

**Years pass...**

**Xander standing over a demon...**   
**Xander standing over a woman...**   
**Xander standing over...**   
**Xander standing....**   
**Xander...**

" _Oh, I'd rather walk a winding road..."_

**Angel fighting Xander in a dark alley... He is losing. Amy Madison is chanting in the background a spell to stop Xander when suddenly a loud sound is heard. Amy was a bright red stain on her chest. She falls to the ground as Lindsey steps out of the shadows holding a gum in his hand. He motions to Gunn and Wesley to closer to Tara and Fred. Tara's eyes turn black at the sight of her fallen girlfriend. Fred grabbed her arm to stop her as Lindsey turned...**

**Xander slammed the stake into Angel's chest. The champion of the powers that be falls to ashes without any fanfare. Lindsey smiled at Xander. Xander in her demon form looked down at Amy's body then back up to Lindsey with a blank stare.**

" _No regrets, no looking back, no goodbyes..."_

**Xander thrust her clawed hand into Lindsey's chest; her hand gripped the pumping heart. She gave a hard yank, pulling it out of his chest. She grinned at the shocked look on his face. Lindsey dropped to his knees as Xander brought up Lindsey's heart to her mouth and took a large bite out of it.**

**Lindsey fell to the ground. Xander dropped the heart to the ground dispassionately. Turned and walked way from the others.**

**Xander looking out into the night sky of LA.**

**A sign, dripping with various shades of blood, some of it was demon most of it was not.**

**It read, 'Welcome to SunnyDale' in once cheerful yellow lettering.**

_"..And dream of a place called home..."_

Lorne was grateful when the visions stopped. He had known Xander could be dangerous. But there was a difference between knowing something and _knowing_ something. He tried to get his emotions under control before he opened his eyes. "What do you know about Lethe's powder?"

A blank look crossed Xander's face...

***

... _is the result..._

Xander walked through Lindsey's apartment; she trailed her fingers across the spines of the books in the bookshelf.

... _when you grind the ingredients up after the spell is cast into a powder_...

She turned to face the fireplace and ran a hand along the mantle. Until she came to the small gold box sitting there.

... _it's faster acting in powder form as well as portable_...

Xander opened the box and looked inside, "...also very hide able."

  
***

Lindsey walked into his apartment. He almost past by the fire place without see it.

Almost.

The gold box was gone.

In its place was a note.

***

Xander held the little gold tin box in her hand. Really, she... Xander sighed and dropped it in to the near by trashcan. She started to walk in the direction of the one place were she knew she could drown her mistakes...

***

Lorne frowned as he heard the noises from down stairs, from the bar. It sounded like someone was trashing the place. He sighed and knew sleep was going to be put off for a while. He went to investigate. Slowly he crept down the stairs and saw a lovely demoness sitting at the bar counter, she had long hip length hair, slightly spotted as was the fur on her arms. Sharp, clawed hands gripped the bottle of Jack Daniels she held. Lorne couldn't make out the low muttering... Suddenly she looked up at the mirror that was behind the bar, a dark expression crossed her face as she bared her fangs at her reflection, growling lowly she threw the bottle at the mirror. Causing it to crack and shatter, falling to the floor.

Okay, that was enough, Lorne thought as he stepped into the bar area. He saw over turned chairs and a couple of broken tables. He was determined to find out why this demoness chose to trash his place and drink away his profits! The demoness in the mean time has had bend over the bar counter looking under it, Lorne could hear the clanking bottles. He strode forward and opened his mouth to demand answers only to close it when a voice he almost recognizes snarled at him, "Relax, host with the most, I'm calming down, Your precious bar is safe now."

At the nickname Lorne realized who this was.

Xander growled, not even as close to being as drunk as she wanted to be. It was a side an effect to her demon form. It took a lot more to get drunk. And one bottle of JD didn't even give a buzz.

"Okay," Lorne said his natural curiosity reasserted itself and out stripped his preservations because he then just had to ask, "So do you mind telling me why you decided to come and trash my bar?"

Xander glared darkly at the green demon, "Why didn't you tell me? You should have warned me. You've heard him sing enough!"

"Who?"

"Lindsey!"

"What about Lindsey, sunshine? I thought you were getting on well."

Xander could only growl again as she took a drink from the bottle she opened. She'd barely swallowed what she had drank when she slammed the bottled down on the bar and said, "No, I can't do this! I'm a white hat. That means I'm not suppose..." But Xander stopped, that would be the wrong thing to say considering her relationship with Spike, was what it was, so instead she said, "Lindsey works for Evil-Fucking-Inc! And you knew!"

Lorne blinked and took a few more steps in Xander's direction but was stopped by the sheer pain radiating off her, "Oh, sunshine, I never thought..." but was cut off by a new voice.

"There's a funny thing about black and white, you should know..."

Lorne and Xander turned toward the voice, Lindsey stood in the doorway of the club, suit rumpled and some files in his hands.

"You mix them together and you get gray. But no matter how much white you put back in...you will always have gray."

Xander turned to look at Lorne, "You knew," then took a long drink from the bottle.

Lorne looked away, yes he knew, and he should have warned her that Lindsey was using his gift to manipulate her along with the Lethe's powder. He should have warned her away from Lindsey at the very start. But he hadn't, because of Xander, Lindsey's destiny was not set in the stone it was before. Lindsey had choices now. And maybe, just maybe Lorne would not be the cause of Lindsey's death. He watched as Xander got up to leave, bottle in hand but Lindsey stopped her and pushed her back on to the barstool.

"No! Wait..."Lindsey said, "I know I should have told you about Wolfram and Hart from the start. And I know you hate me now. You have every reason but I do love you!" Xander flinched; the glare he received was dark and edging towards horror. Lindsey laid the files on the bartop," In these files is everything W&H has on you and your associates, and the enemies brewing in your town, everything I could find...."

Xander looked at the files and her hand hovered over them, then she swept them off the counter and onto the floor. She stood up muttering, "No, can't, won't do this!" She faced Lindsey, brining a clawed hand up to his face, "You lie, you betray me, and I could forgive those things. But you played with my memory, my feelings... That I just can't forgive... And now you offer a quick fix and think everything can be as it was..." Clawed fingertips caressed his face, "You really are my Angelus, aren't you?"

"I _love_ you, Xander," Lindsey said but couldn't understand why she flinched for a second time, "Nothing will change that."

_"Love?"_ Xander scoffed, "You work for a law firm that wanted me to become an assassin for them! What are you going to tell me next? That your interest in me was pure, that it was just about me and not what your law firm wanted?" Lindsey glance away and Xander made a distressed sound from the back of her throat. She started to move away from him but Lindsey reacted by pulling her to him and kissing her desperately. Xander couldn't help but response to the kiss, her hand crept up and clenched in his hair. For a moment, just a moment she lost herself to him. Then roughly she shoved him away from her. Panting, she snarled at him. Lindsey's lip was bleeding from where one of her fangs had cut him; Xander turned and snatched the bottle from the bar counter then pushed past Lindsey. She stopped in the doorway, "I think the note said everything, don't you?" Was all she said as she walked out of Caritas.

Lindsey sat down on the barstool, Xander had left, heavily. He looked at Lorne, who just sighed, "You brought this on yourself, Lindsey." The green demon said before turning and walking back up the stairs to his apartment.

Leaving Lindsey alone.

***

Xander stood outside the club; she brought the bottle up to her lips. "My taste in men is apparently like my taste in women..."

***

The next day Xander walked into the diner carrying her uniform, in one hand and her duffle bag in another, she saw a blonde girl dressed in Goth wear sitting alone at a table. She looked how Xander felt, like her world had ended. Xander walked by and laid the uniform in front of her, the blonde looked up as Xander said, "Sometimes you just need a new start."

The girl nodded, "Yeah, maybe."

***

"... _It gonna rain down fire...It's gonna burn us all..."_

Lilah turned away from the man pouring his heart out on stage and looked at Lorne.

"He's not taking this well, is he?"

Lorne just shook his head and replied with a soft, "No."

***

Xander got on the bus and sat down in a seat. The radio played in the background softly, _"...I can't feel a thing..."_ Xander ignored the single tear that ran down her cheek.

***

Lindsey stepped off stage and pulled a piece of folded paper from his pocket, he opened it and stared at the writing...

_**'It's over**_ ,' was all it said.

But it wasn't...

There was an opening in the Wolfram and Hart office in a small town over the Hellmouth.

Not by a long shot.


	11. A Week Ago

**ONE WEEK BEFORE XANDER RETURNED TO SUNNYDALE**

 

Oz reached over and turned the radio station. He was on his way back to Sunnydale.The gig he had over the summer had been cool. The other bands had been fun to get to know and see perform. But he had missed Amy and Jonathan...

****

Jessica paced nervously, the skirt of her white sundress flaring out at her knees with each turn she makes.

"Am I doing the right thing?" Jessica asked Joyce Summers, who was standing nearby watching her friend have a small break down with a smirk.

Joyce shrugged, "You love Rupert, don't you?"

Jessica opened her mouth but before she could answer Joyce's question. Rupert Giles came around the corner wearing a black suit with a matching tie while being followed by Buffy, Willow and Cordelia.

"Giles cleans up really nice, doesn't he?" Cordelia said with a grin.

Jessica could not take her eyes from him. It just wasn't fair that the man could be so good looking. She nodded to what Cordelia had said as Rupert walked up to her.

"You look breathtaking," Rupert told her looking as nervous as she felt. And that's when Jessica knew. Knew that this was the right choice. That she loved Rupert Giles without any doubts at all.

Rupert offered his arm to her, "Shall we?"

Jessica took his arm, "We shall."

Arm in arm, Jessica Harris and Rupert Giles walked up the stairs to SunnyDale's City Hall.

****

**In An Unknown Time, In An Unknown Plane Of Existence.**

Dawn squealed happily, pulling the sheet she was wearing tighter around herself, all but jumping up and down at what she saw playing out on the vision-portal. After all the angst and betrayal it was wonderful to see a good event happen.

"Dawn, must you?" Came the whine of a male voice and the rustling of bed covers. Her happiness though woke up Connor. She turned away from the sight of Giles and Xander's Mom walking up the steps to City Hall. Connor was sitting up in the bed that had appeared shortly after he had revealed who he was to her. It had been a pleasurable reunion for them both. Connor ran a hand through his hair making it stand up, his resemblance to Angel more obvious. Dawn made her way to the bed and dropped down onto it with a small bounce.

"Con, I'm watching Giles get married to Xander's mom!"

"So?" Connor asked confused, he had never met Giles in the 'Before' so he really didn't get what the big deal was expect that he was important to Dawn.

"So!? So, it like totally cool!"

Connor shrugged it did really matter to him so long as Dawn was happy with it, reaching for a lock of Dawn's hair. He wrapped it around his finger using it to draw her closer to him,

"If you say so..." He kissed her for a long moment then pulled away slightly as he asked, "Do we really have to talk about it  _now?"_

Dawn looked between him and the vision-portal screen. She looked torn fro a second and it made Connor feel bad for making her choose. Then she said while giving him the look, "Please. I can do this with you anytime. But watching Giles _marry_ Xander's mom? A once in a lifetime event!" Dawn jumped up off the bed going over to sit in front of the vision portal in to time to hear the vows begin.

Connor sighed, flopping back down on the bed.

***

Faith cursed. That was the last time she would ever hitch a ride with someone who drove and  '67 Impala. That guy had been plain weird.

Cute, yes, but weird. And now she was stuck in out in the boonies. Nowhere near where she needed to go.

***

_'he demonic underworld is a worse than a gossip rag_. Spike thought as he sat at the bar in the Bronze. He tossed back every drink the bartender would give him. He had been back only for a few days when he learned his break up with Dru was hot news. In fact it was only second to that of the Hyena taking up with a lawyer from Wolfram and Hart.

And that was why he was now drowning his sorrows. Xander hadn't waited for him. But really it had been foolish on his part to hope that she would. After all he had left town with and for Drusilla. Spike blinked blurrily when the girl with waist length hair bumped into him.  She smiled vapidly at him, but Spike could see the predator gleam in her blue eyes. She reached up and twirled a lock of golden hair around her finger,

"My name's Harmony..."

_'Why not_?' Spike thought after a moment, he grinned his most charming grin, all but purred, "Spike, luv..."

_'After all, there's no reason form me to wait_....' Spike thought as Harmony sat down on the barstool next to him.


	12. And Now...The Party

Xander shut the door as quietly as possible. There was no need to wake up her mother, just because she had returned. Treading softly up the stairs and going into her room she closed the door behind her and dropped her duffle bag to the floor. Slowly she looked around the room, it was just as she left it five months ago.  Her school bag was hanging on the chair of her desk in the corner. One of the drawers to her dresser was slightly open, but there were no clothes hanging out of it like there normally were. Her mother's only touch to the room besides the fresh bed sheets, Xander found when she returned down the top blankets. Xander's favorite blue and purple jammies were laid out on the end of her bed, as if it were any other night when Xander had come home from a late night patrol. Stripping out of her leather jacket she dropped it to the floor it was soon followed by the rest of her clothes as she changed into the pajamas. She crawled into the bed and pulled the covers up around her neck. Trying hard not to think of the past events with Lindsey, trying not to noticed how much it hurt. How much she wished...but she didn't wish because this was the Hellmouth and you never knew who was listening... No matter how much she wanted him to hurt too. _Other than that_ , she thought sleepily, _it was good to be home_.

Jessica stopped at the door to her daughter's room as she did each morning, as she had all summer long. Slowly she opened the door, looking over the room, sighing to herself she stepped back and closed the door back and started down the hall, she froze in mid step... Something had not been right!

Turning back to Xander's room she opened the door again and there on the bed was a lump, a snoring lump...a snoring lump with long dark hair ...

Jessica went to the bed an slowly pulled down the cover's revealing Xander's face, the girl was curled up in her favorite sleeping wear as if she had never left!

"She came in at about three a.m." Rupert said softly from the doorway.

Xander-lump moved at the sound of his voice, snorted in her sleep then opened one of her eyes, "Hi, mom..."

"You are so grounded." Jessica said with a slight smile.

Xander closed her eye as she muttered a sleepy, "'Kay," then turned over cuddling down into her blankets.

Jessica and Rupert left Xander's room.

***

Xander woke up to the sound of...was that hammering?

Xander was sure it was coming from down stairs. She got up and dressed then went down stairs. In the living room her mother was standing on a stool, while driving a nail into the wall. Joyce Summers was standing near her holding a craved wooden mask...with fangs?

"... Agree to let you host your party here, again why?" Xander heard her mother ask Joyce.

"Because you have more wall space then I do."

Jessica paused the hammer in mid swing, "No, that's not it. You just didn't want to hang these ugly things in your house."

Joyce gave Jessica a grin and did not deny it. Xander walked into the room as Jessica began to hammer at the wall, "Mom?" Xander asked causing Joyce to jump startled and Jessica to miss the nail. Xander flinched at the sight of the hole that was now in the wall.

"Xan-girl, your up!" Jessica said turning to look at her daughter. But Xander's attention was on the wooden mask already hanging on the wall, some of them looked vaguely human, others looked more animalistic. Xander was sure one of them looked like the face of a hyena.

"There Nigerian." Joyce said at Xander's interest in them. Jessica took the mask Joyce had been holding, hanging it on the wall.  "I got them in a shipment for the Art Gallery and thought they would make good conversantal pieces."

Jessica snorted, "You mean, you hope to sell them to people who would think that's what they are."

Joyce frowned at Jessica, "And what's wrong with that?"

Jessica gave her friend a look, then one to the mask on the wall, "It's angry...it wants the room to suffer!"

Joyce gave Jessica a light shove and laughed, "You have no apperception for primitive art."

"Not if it looks like this." Jessica said pointing at the mask. It was then Xander noticed the flash of gold on her mother's hand.

"Nice ring." Xander told her.

Jessica held out her hand,  "You think? Rupert as a matching one."

"What?" Xander asked confused.

"Rupert and I got married while you were away." Jessica said tensely. Joyce moved closer to her friend in silent support.

Xander blinked, then blinked again, "Cool," was the only thing she could say at the news.

Jessica let out a relieved sigh but then she noticed that Xander had her leather jacket in hand. "Going out?" She asked cautiously.

Xander nodded, "Thought I'd find Buffy and Wills. Let them know I'm back."

"Will there be slaying?" Joyce asked. She was still coming to terms with her daughter being the Slayer and at how dangerous SunnyDale really was. She had been glad to have Jessica to talk to over the summer about what it was like to have a super powered daughter.

Xander smirked, "Only if they give me any lip."

But Jessica could tell the jest was half-hearted at best. Something was wrong with her girl.  Jessica could only hope that Xander would come to her and not run again. "Go, have fun." Jessica said softly to Xander.

Xander gave her mother a long look, there was so much she wanted to ask, so much she wanted to know...So much she wanted to tell her mother but the words just wouldn't come. Instead Xander nodded to her mother then left.

Jessica turned to Joyce and sighed, "It's going to get worse, isn't it?"

"Yeah, Jess, I think it is." Joyce told her kindly.

Jessica turned back to the wall and looked at the hole in it, "I thought so."

***

Xander met up with Amy and Jonathon while she was looking for Buffy and Willow. She found out that they all had been patrolling while Xander had been gone and Buffy was in L.A. visting her father. Xander felt slightly bad about that. Until she saw how confident Jonathon was and how self a sure Amy was. It had been good for them. Dangerous, yes, but still good for them they knew they could handle themselves now. Jonathon spoke into his walkie-talkie and was told to have Xander go to Giles apartment, the other girls would met her there since they had promised to help Giles pack. Amy told Xander that she and Jonathon were going to go tell Oz that Xander was back. Since he was at the Bronze playing with the Dingoes. Xander met up with the girls just outside Giles's apartment building.  They walk to Giles's place, "What if he's mad?" Xander asked know that Giles couldn't be anything else.

"Mad?" Buffy asked, "Why would he be mad that you ran-a-way, abandoned your post..."

"...Your friends and your mom..."Cordelia said cuttingly, she liked Xander's mom, she had great fashion sense.

"...Made him lay awake worrying about you, worrying about your mom worry about you..." Willow looked at Cordelia and Buffy, "We should wait out here. It will be safer!"

Xander sighed knowing they were right, but... She knocked on the door a couple times then waited for what seemed like forever. When Giles opened the door, his face was expressionless for a long moment then softly he said, "Welcome home, Xander." After Giles let the girls, they sat tensely in his half packed living room.

"I got in early this morning, sleep all day, and saw mom..." Xander looked around the room, "learned something things..."She then turned her gaze on to Giles.

Giles cleared his throat, "How is she?"

"Married."

"Ah." Giles said as he took off his glasses, fiddled with them for a moment, " I see, " he said as he put his glasses back on.

"I don't think you do," Xander said slowly.

"Xander..." Giles began but the whistling from the teakettle, he got up and went to the kitchen.

"Well," Cordelia said hoping to break up the tension in the room, "at least you and Buffy aren't wanted for murder anymore."

"God! That was such a drag." Buffy said but her eyes were sad, remembering Kendra.

"So, where were you?" Willow asked, "Were you in Belgium?"

Xander looked confused at that, "Why Belgium?"

Willow shrugged, "For the chocolate of course.

While in the kitchen pouring his tea, Giles smiled at the laughter he could her from the girls.

After dropping the girls home, Xander and Giles rode in his small car in slience.

"You do know, Jessica and yourself will have to go and see Snyder about returning to school." Giles said.

Xander said a very bad word under her breath.

"Quite." Giles agreed.

***

The meeting with Snyder did not go well.

***

Later that afternoon Xander and Jessica sat in the kitchen while they watched Giles cook. That had surprised Xander Giles had never cooked in the 'Before' that she could remember. "So, this party Joyce conned you into...."

Jessica rolled her eyes at her daughter's inqurary. "It was suppose to be something to take my mind off of you not being here."

"Oh," Xander said in a small tone, then rallied, "So, when is Giles moving in?"

"Day after the party," Jessica told her, "You're ok with this, right? Me and Rupert?"

Xander frowned, "If I wasn't you'd have known long before now! Besides he..." Jessica watched worriedly as Xander turned pale and choked over her next words, "... lo-lo...that thing with you, right?"

Jessica looked over at the man pretending that he wasn't listening to them talk about him. Jessica nodded understanding what Xander trying to say, "Yes, yes he does."

Xander asked, "And...you...him, too?"

"Very much." Jessica told Xander and smiled at her husband when Rupert looked over his shoulder at them.

***

Xander returned from her patrol, things still quiet on the supernatural front and would be until September. She walked passed the masks on the wall and up stairs; she never saw the eyes of one of the masks glow a demonic red.

Out in the back yard under a tree, dirt began to shift, and rumble. A small clawed paw broke through the soil the thing clawed its way out of the small grave, it shakes itself knocking of the loose dirt, and clumps of bluish colored fur from it's small body. It lets out a small menacing sound, it's eyes glowing red.

***

Xander reached up under her bed, the thing had shot into the house when she had taken out the trash this morning after the fight with her mother. Private school was so not going to happen and her mother knew that!

"Welcome to the Hellmouth petting zoo," Xander muttered just as Giles came in the room carrying a cage. Xander pulled out the bluish colored longhaired kitten out from under the bed.

"God, what a stench!" Giles exclaimed.

"Well what do you expect for a cat that's been dead for almost six months?" Xander asked. She put the kitten in the cage and shoved the cage at Giles who almost dropped it when the beast inside yowled loudly. Xander walked out of the room followed by Giles. Giles put the cage on the coffee table. Jessica was standing nearby trying to look as if the smell wasn't making her sick. Xander just wore a sad look as she looked at the kitten. Giles noticed the masks on the walls and asked about them.

"They belong to Joyce. She's hoping to sell them... At the party tonight." Jessica frowned at him, "You do remember..."

Giles nodded as an idea was slowly coming to mind. He just had to research it.

***

The cage sat on the table in the library, Oz expected the animal closely, not bothered by the stench. Willow and Cordelia keep their distance from it.  Jonathon seems to share Oz's fascination with thing.

"Looks dead, smells dead, "Oz said, "but still moving about."

"Nice pet, Xander." Cordelia snarked.

"It was." Xander said with a glare to the cheerleader.

"Was what?" Cordelia asked confused.

"My pet."

"Oh," Cordelia said then gave an 'I'm sorry' shrug.

"You should call it..."Jonathon started, but was elbowed in the side by Oz, who shook his head.

Xander turned her glare on him, "It had a name. Besides I don't want to feed it or play with it. It's dead."

"That's not what you'd say about Spike." Buffy muttered.

"Don't go there, she who is in same boat!"

"Actually me and Angel decided to take a break from each other." Buffy said with a smirk.

"How nice..." Xander hissed.

"Enough both of you!" Giles said as he came down from the stacks. "We want to find out how and why it rose from the grave."

Willow walked over to Xander and put a hand on the dark haired girls shoulder, "What about your mom's party? I told her we would help out."

"I'm the dip." Cordelia popped up with causing Xander to smile as she said, "Well you gotta like the purity of that!"

***

Xander was in the girl's restroom washing her hands when Harmony came in with another girl.

"...Really, green is so not your color, Ariel! Like I can help that my Blondie-Bear is so much hotter then David!"

Xander had only ever heard Harmony refer to one person as that... Xander could not help the low growl that escaped her. Green was not the color Xander would worry about if she were Harm...considering that Xander was having a hard time seeing past the red haze in front of her eyes. "Oh, Harmony..." Xander sing-songed, causing Harmony to freeze almost like a hunted deer would.

***

_'The SunnyDale Motor Lodge,'_ Xander thought as she stared at room number seventeen. That number always gave her the shivers. Xander pounded on the door, it hadn't taken much for Harmony to give up Spike's location. Of all the stupid things... Xander sighed it was nice to know though that Harmony would never change. The door to the room swung open, the smell of booze almost knocked her down. The occupant stayed in the shadows, "Oi what..." Was all Spike could get out before Xander's fist hit him square in the nose knocking him to the floor. 

"Harmony?" Xander hissed at the downed vampire.

Spike looked up blinking, a drunken grin came to his face, "Xanpet, your back!"

_"Harmony!"_ Xander growls again at him.

Spike cringes, opened his mouth, then sighed, "She really will be smarter as a vampire, pet." Xander snorted at the answer but shook her head and left. Spike sat on the floor a long moment as a smirk crossed his face.

His girl was back!

***

People had been arriving at the house for the last ten minsutes, after the Dingoes had finished setting up, Xander didn't know half the people who had walked through the door. But she was sure at least most of SunnyDale was here.  Xander was sure she saw Spike lurking around somewhere too. Xander spotted Jonathon and Amy watching Oz play, Willow and Cordelia were in a corner making out. Her mother, Giles and Joyce were talking to some of the adult guests. Xander stood in a room full of family and friends...yet felt so alone. A hand on her shoulder caused her to jump, she turned to see Buffy standing there behind her. Buffy took Xander by the arm and lead her to the less crowded dining room.

"Is everything ok?" Buffy asked. Xander nodded but the look on Xander's face did nothing to convince her, "Because you don't seem to be here."

"Where else would I be?" Xander asked.

"Wherever you were during the summer?" Buffy asked in return. A dark look crossed her friend's face then curtly Xander said, "No, not there."

Buffy could tell there was more that Xander wasn't telling.

***

As Xander was walking past the kitchen she heard Joyce ask, "How are you really doing?"

Xander peaked around the door in time to see Joyce hand her mother a cup of something.  Her mother sighed and shrugged before taking a drink and making a face at the cup before putting it down. "I'm okay, Rupert is wonderful and I'm glad Xander is home. While she was gone all I wanted was for her to come back but... She seems so different, now..."

"But?" Joyce asked.

"But I thought it would be better, you know. Only it's harder... I don't know what to say...or what not too, I don't even know why she left," Jessica paused a dark look crossed her face, "although I have a few ideas as to why... She just hasn't said anything to me. Nor has she said anything about my marriage to Rupert." Jessica finished as she picked up the cup she put down and took another drink making the same face, "Is there alcohol in this," she asked handing Joyce the cup.  Jessica looked at the doorway thinking she heard something but it was just the pounding music of the party. Really she was going to have to do something about that. The last thing she need was a visit from the cops for disturbing the peace.

Xander had jerked back out of the doorway before her mother had seen her, thinking about what her mother had said as she went up the stairs. After entering her room she looked around, walking over to her desk when she noticed one of the drawers was open. Looking down into it, she saw the ruby necklace she had got last Valentines Day. Quickly she slammed the drawer shut, she sniffled then wiped her nose with the back of her hand. Going over to her bed she pulled the duffle bag from under it.

Xander couldn't do it. She just couldn't...

***

"What are you doing?"

Xander looked over her shoulder at Buffy who was leaning in the doorway.  Then down at the half packed duffle bag, "I would think that was self-explanatory."

"You are not _going_ anywhere!" Buffy exclaimed angrily.

Xander shook her head turning back to her packing, "It's not like I'm really needed here. Mom has Giles, Willow and Cordy are great. Jono, Ams, and Oz are still good. Everyone is happy! No one needs my problems!"

"What problems?!" Buffy snarked.  "You always do this...  With the not telling of stuff. How can we help if we... *I* help if I don't know what's going on with you! Leaving again is not going to help. So really, don't forget not to write this time!" By the time Buffy had finished she was yelling at Xander. The other girl twirled around to face the blonde. Buffy was shocked to see tears running down Xander's face as she stuttered out,

"Why...why are y-y-you att-att-attacking me. Everything is in my life is screwed up! I'm a time-traveling guy who had a mystical sex change, who is merging with a primal goddess! I'm _trying*_ to stop events that almost killed us in the 'Before'. I'm helping you patrol so you can have more of a normal life. Spike and I were tortured by your boyfriend for days and you _never_ seemed to care! It was Angel, Angel, ANGEL!" Xander screamed at Buffy, "I left so I wouldn't stake the bastard like I wanted to and have you hate me for it. The sad thing is I might still do it anyways!"

Buffy could only stare at Xander during this tirade but Xander wasn't done yet as she continued, "Now I come back and find out my mom is married, Spike is fooling around with Harmony," Buffy made a face at that remark, "I left L.A. because the lawyer I was seeing turned out to be working for hell, literarily! I am trying. So give me a break, okay!"

Buffy's eyes had widened at what Xander had said about the lawyer and knew there was more to it, but she motioned to the duffle bag, "Looks like you're giving up."

"You guys were doing fine without me."

"It's not like we had a lot of choice there, Xan." Buffy snarled she hadn't liked the worry Xander had caused her. Being the Slayer was stressful enough without having to wonder everyday while Xander had been gone if she was still alive or not.

"I'm sorry I had to leave. But you don't know what it was like."

"That goes back to the 'you don't tell me anything', thing!" Buffy told Xander, "But I want too."

Xander sighed, "You're so young, there are things I've done, and not done. That haunts my every choice now..."

"I'm the Slayer, Xan. I think I know something about choices and the not having any. I mean I'm in love with a vampire with a soul who I can never really be with. My time as a Slayer is destined to be short." Buffy choked back a small sob, "But I know things will be ok, you're here... And then you weren't. Xander you're the only person who can even remotely begin to understand what it's like for me. You're my best friend... And you weren't there!"

***

Giles as he drove back to Jessica's house snarled to himself harshly, "...the masks are for Joyce's party! They raise the dead, woman!"A dark figure of a man stepped out into the road in front of the car. He was barely able to slam on the breaks. Through the windshield he could see the advance state of decay on the face of the man... thing... Zombie? Is in.

"Raises the dead," Giles muttered as he twisted the wheel and went around the walking dead man.

***

Jessica walked by Xander's room on the way to her own, her head hurt, and things were fuzzy, she didn't like it and all she wanted was to lay down. She was never trusting Joyce with the punch bowl again! She paused when she saw the door to Xander's room was open when she looked inside her daughter and Buffy were glaring at each other. Then she saw the packed duffle bag on Xander's bed. "What's this?"

Both girls turned at the voice.

"Xander's running away again!" Buffy said harshly.

"No, I'm..."

Jessica frowned, "You can't just take off whenever you feel like it!"

Xander noticed the slight sway in her mother's walk as she made her way over, the vague look in her eyes and could smell the alcohol when she spoke, "You can't leave!"

"You're drunk." Xander spoke flatly, no hint of expression on her face.

Jessica glared her daughter, "No, I'm not."

"Yes..." Xander said slowly as she picked up the duffle bag and walked around her mother, "You...are." Xander did not want to deal with her mother with her like this. Memories of things that had happened in the 'Before' tried to flood their way back into Xander's mind. But she shook them off, and started down the stairs she could hear her mother and Buffy following her. When she reached the bottom she almost ran into Willow and Cordelia, who had been kissing and if it were any other time Xander would have stopped to admire the sight.

"Don't you leave this house!" Jessica shouted over the music but Xander didn't stop her determined walk. Jessica jumped a few of the stair and ran to catch up to Xander just before she made it to the front door. Grabbing her daughter by the arm she spun Xander around "You don't get to walk away! I've changed things too much for that! The things I did...sacrificed for us to have this life...it's suppose to be different THIS TIME!" Jessica yelled the music form the party fell silent as a result.

Xander frowned at her mother. Like Xander didn't know..."So, now the truth comes out..."

Jessica froze, _oh, no..._

"Did you really think I didn't know?" Xander snarled at her mother, "I've always known."

"Known what?" Jessica asked in a small voice.

"That you wear the stench of vengeance magic like perfume? What was it? What did you wish for?" Xander asked, "That you weren't a drunk? That you hadn't married one? That you had a daughter instead of a son?" Xander watched as her mother got upset and continued to taunt her with, "Well, come on, tell me!"

Jessica shook her head. She couldn't...

"Or maybe you just wished that Tony Harris was gone, or did you wish him dead? I couldn't blame you if you did."

"Nothing like that!" Jessica finely burst out, "I just wanted things to be different, Xander! You were gone to leading your own life. I was so proud that you weren't like us. You did warn us... warned him. When the end came... I had lain under the rumble of the house for days when _he_ came... Anya's old boss is what he said he was. I was so tired by then, so angry too! So when he offered I took it!"

"D'hoffron," Xander muttered under her breath then louder asked, "Took what? A second chance, a do over... What?"

"A new life with my child."

It looked like the powers that be might not responsible for Xander's sex change after all. One less reason to curse them. Xander knew why her mother had accepted, had made the wish. But...

"I hope your wish is worth the price we'll pay." Xander told her mother softly.

Jessica flinched at the tone her daughter used but understood what she meant. There was a price for everything, nothing is free... "This life it is better, isn't it?"

Xander shrugged, "Maybe... We'll have to see, won't we?"

Jessica started to say something but was interrupted by the zombie that had crashed through the nearby window. Jessica hated it when zombies did that. Windows were expensive to replace. The appearance of the walking dead person...caused many of the guests to scream, some to faint and others thought it was a great gag until the zombie reach out and bit the nearest person turning them into a zombie.

Xander gave Buffy a dark grin, "Oh, violence. Care to join me?"

Buffy grinned back, "Always."

***

Giles ran through the door of the house in time to see a zombie fly into a wall. Apparently Buffy had thrown it into it. He told Buffy that the mask was a vehicle to raise the dead for the demon, Ovu Mobani. He told Buffy the only to kill it was to strike it's eyes.

Unforturanetely, Xander was the one fighting the demon.

Xander hit the ground hard after being thrown out the back door by the woman wearing the wooden mask. The woman had been one of the first to be bitten by the zombies that had invaded the house. Xander had seen the others zombies cower before this... thing.  And when evil things were afraid of other evil things it was never a good thing.

Xander blinked as she felt Shakarri rise forcefully up in her mind. It was rare that the Primal Goddess did that; Xander could feel herself morph into her demonic form.

" _ **Ovu Mobani..."** _ Shakarri intoned deeply, and Xander knew what the creature really was... the embodiment of one of the lesser gods of the dead, one of the more evil ones.

" _ **Goddess**_..." the demon god hissed, " _ **It has been a long time since we have met eater of my flesh..."**_

Slowly Shakarri, stood and...it was almost like in the 'Before' when Xander had been possessed, able to see and hear everything but with little control. _I hope you know what you're doing_. Xander told the goddess in her head. She could almost see Shakarri's smirk.

Shakarri inclined her head to the demon, " _ **So it has, and I really had hoped not to see your ugly face again**_."

Xander groaned, because that was only going to make the demon mad, maybe she really was a bad influence on people!

Buffy ran outside on to the back porch she could see Xander in her demonic from fighting the mask- wearing zombie. She paused just long enough to pick up the shovel that was leaning against the wall of the house.  She saw the zombie knock Xander down pinning her to the ground.  Buffy raced up to them...

"Hey ugly!" When the demon turned to look at her," Make you look," Said Buffy as she swung the shovel the sharp side of it striking the zombie right in the eyes. It let out a loud, ear-piercing shriek. Then in a bright flash of light, the mask fell off of the now very alive woman. Who looked at Buffy in confusion then but when she looked at Xander gave a frighten yell them promptly fainted. Xander just let out a relieved sigh when Shakarri retreated back to the dark place in Xander's mind. Xander and Buffy went back into the house and saw the others were fighting the zombies that were left, but watched as they disappeared in flashes of white light like Ovu Mobani had. Leaving behind a lot of confused people, whom Jessica had told that the punch had been spiked and got them all rides home. 

As the last person left Jessica muttered, "I'm so glad that's over." She walked into the dining room and saw her daughter's friends along with Joyce and Rupert cleaning up the mess from the party and the zombies.

"So, was this a typical day at the office," Jessica heard Joyce ask Buffy as the girl picked up some cups.

Buffy paused, "Nah, this was nothing."

Jessica tried very had not to snicker at the look that came to the blond woman's face.  She went over to her own daughter who was sweeping the floor. "Hey, are we okay?"

Xander paused in mid swept of the broom she looked around the room. Amy and Willow were throwing plates and napkins into a trash bag that Oz was holding. Cordelia was straighten up some knocked over dining room chairs. Looking through the doorway she could see Jonathan helping Giles fix the front door.

Nodding Xander said, "We will be..."

***

The next morning Giles walked into Snyder's office. 

The smaller man looked up from what he was doing when he saw the other man. "Contrats on your marriage, Mr. Giles. But if I were you I'd be careful. Men always did have a way of disappearing mysteriously around Jessica."

Giles ignored that remark. "I'd like a word, if I may?"

"If it's about Xander Harris, the answer is no. Now if you don't mind I have an appointment with the mayor." Snyder said.

"You can't keep her out of this school."

Snyder snorted as he put on his jacket. "I think you'll find I can."

"You had no grounds to expel her in the first place."

Snyder smirked, "I had grounds and also kind of a tingly feeling. There's just something not right about that girl."

"Xander is a minor and is entitled to a public education. Your personal dislike of the girl does not legally..."

Snyder interrupted Giles, "Why don't you take it up with the city council if you feel that strongly about it." He gathered up some files that were on his desk.

"I thought I'd start with the Supreme Court." Giles told Snyder causing the other man to stop and look at him. "You're powerful in local circles I'll give you that but I know I can make things difficult for you... _my_ daughter will be allowed back in this school."

"Sorry, not convinced." Snyder said snidely and tried to leave. Giles though grabbed the smaller man and shoved him into a filing cabinet that was near the door.

Giles grinned darkly, "Would you like me to convince you?"

Having underesmated the Englishman Snyder shook his head nervously.

***

Buffy watched Xander who had done nothing but stare in to her coffee cup since they had sat down in the Expresso Pump. Buffy had hoped Xander was going to tell her about L.A. and about the lawyer. But so far all Xander had done was listen to Buffy. At least Buffy thought she was listening to her,"... So, then I jump down into the hellworld to slave the humans that had been tricked by that law firm."

Xander's head jerked up at that, "What?"

"You haven't been listening have you?"

Xander grimaced, "Sorry, I should have been with you."

Buffy said nothing but sipped her latte.

"I'm sorry," Xander repeated, "Really I am!"

Buffy nodded, "I think I understand, not that you've told me anything to help understand but...I forgive you for bailing. I'll just have to be grown up about it and make allowances for..."

"Your not going to let this go anytime soon, are you?" Xander asked interrupting the blond girl. "The whole moral superiority thing doesn't look good on you... You need less of it."

"It's like a drug," Buffy said with a grin.

Xander sighed, "Okay, fine...I'll take my dues for... for a short while."

"If I didn't give you a hard time. You would think something was wrong with me." Buffy told the other girl then was silent for a second, "Runaway..."

"Buffy!" Xander exclaimed warningly.

"Sorry," Buffy giggled out, "Quitter."

Xander's eyes narrowed at the remark, "Whiner."

"Bailer."

"Delinquent."

"Kettle."

Xander thought for a moment, yeah that was true, and returned with, "Bad Seed."

The name-calling went on for hours.

***

A young man with blond hair walked into the office of Mayor Wilkins The Third.

"And what can I do for you young man?" the mayor asked with all the charm of a snake oil salesman.

"My name is Lindsey MacDonald... And I work for Wolfram and Hart."


	13. Faith, Hope and...Lindsey?

Things had been quiet since Jessica's ill-fated party, for which Xander had been grateful but Xander could not shake the feeling of being watched lately. At first she had thought Spike had resumed stalking her. Then realized she was getting the feeling more during the day. She knew it couldn't be the vampire. It wasn't until Saturday afternoon while Xander was eating lunch with her mother and Buffy at the SunShine Diner when it happened. Xander had just finished her lunch when a waitress came up to their table and told them that their meal had been paid for...

"By who?" Jessica asked.

"By the blond gentleman in the corner." The waitress told them. Xander turned around in her seat in the booth they were sitting in and to the surprise of her mother and Buffy. 

Xander went pale as she whispered, "Lindsey..." she jumped up and bolted for the diner's door. Buffy saw that the blond man had beaten Xander to the door and grabbed Xander by the arm. Buffy stood up at the look of fear that crossed Xander's face. She made it over to them in time to hear the man say, "...that easy? Did you?"

Xander jerked out of Lindsey hold, "... What I said!"

"Xander?" Buffy asked when she got to them. Buffy didn't like that this stranger touched Xander with such ease. Her Xander wasn't one for touching casually.

"Who's your friend, Xan?"

"No one you should concern yourself with Lindsey. Now why don't you make all our lives easier and just leave." Xander said.

Lindsey shook his head, "Can't do that. I'm now Head of the SunnyDale Branch of Wolfram and Heart."

Xander went even paler; Buffy hadn't thought that was possible.

"Look, mister..." Buffy started but was cut off.

"Call me Lindsey... Lindsey MacDonald."

"Look Mr. MacDonald, you seem to be bothering my friend. So you need to..." Buffy paused, "Go away."

Buffy watched as MacDonald smiled, a charmingly cold smile, as he said, "Your spunky. You get might last longer than your kind normally does."

"My kind?"

Lindsey leaned closer as he said softly, "Slayers, of course."  He turned to Xander and was about to say something when Jessica walked up to them. From her expression the other three could tell she wasn't happy but only said, "Thank for paying for our meal. But the girls and I must be going now. So, if you will excuse us."

As the three women left the diner Xander looked over her shoulder at Lindsey who said lowly, "Until next time, Darlin'."

Once they were in the car Jessica turned to her daughter, "Who was that?"

Xander shrugged.

"Xan-girl, you will answer me." The tone Jessica use was one that Xander never argued with, the Mom Tone.

Xander sighed and slumped in the seat, "I don't need this. Really, I don't."

"Xander?"

"Trouble. Nothing but trouble." Xander moaned then explained to both Buffy and her mother how she knew Lindsey and just why he was going to be trouble. Although Xander did leave out a few key details about how well Lindsey and she knew each other. If she hadn't her mother would have went back to the diner and killed the lawyer in the bloodiest way possible.

Moms are funny like that.

Jessica sighed. "You truly don't like making things easy for yourself, do you?"

Xander only shrugged in reply.

****

Monday afternoon in the park had Xander waiting for the gang to show up. She packed a picnic lunch. It had been her mother's idea, simply because Xander was driving her crazy at home.

"...In a nutshell." Xander hear Willow, causing Xander to look up and see everyone sans Amy and Jonathan. Xander called out a greeting and asked where the two absent friends were.

"Amy has a cold." Willow said.

"...And Jon, has a different lunch period than us this year." Oz told Xander.

"That sucks."

Willow nodded, "But at least Amy shares it with him."

"Xander! Banned from the campus but not from our heats. What's for lunch?" Buffy said as she sat down next to Xander at the parks' picnic table and began to rummage through the large picnic basket. Oz climbed up and sat cross-legged on the table, as Cordelia and Willow cuddled on the bench. Cordelia looked impressed at the offerings Buffy was pulling out of the basket.

"All our favs...."the cheerleader frowned, "When did you learn to cook?"

"Funny Cor, it not hard to mess up PB&J. Besides I had a lot of time on my hands."

"You know," Buffy said slowly as she took a bite of the sandwich she unwrapped, "they have to let you back in."

"Well, yeah but the troll is making me see the school shrink." Xander then paused taking a pudding cup out of the basket, "Can you believe that we have a _shrink?"_

"Makes sense. They had to have someway of making the weird seem normal." Buffy said.

"Eww. Swallow before you speak!" Cordelia complained.

"Oh, Buffy! Scott Hope at twelve o'clock!" Willow said with a bounce in her seat.

Buffy looked over her shoulder in the boy's direction he was talking to some of his friends. Ever since she and Angel had decided not to see each other she had slow began to notice other guys. And Scott Hope was a cutie.

"He likes you." Cordelia said. "He wanted to ask you out last year but..." She trailed off.

"Yeah, Buff maybe you can do that thing..." Xander said, "You know... with your mouth... that guys like."

At that statement Buffy blinked in shock because there was no way Xander had meant... Then she saw the smirk on the dark haired girl's face. Buffy growled lowly and hit Xander in the shoulder, exclaiming, "Xander," in outage.

Scott Hope wandered over to them exchanging a lingering hello with Buffy. Although how a simple "Hi," could linger Xander didn't know. When the moment ended and when Scott left the conversation turned to how Buffy wanted to do normal stuff.

**'** _Normality_ ,' Xander thought darkly while she stabbed her pudding cup with a spork, _'is overrated_.'

***

The next day Xander walked out of Snyder's office after the man's welcome back 'and if you do anything you'll have detention for the rest of the year' speech. She made her way to the library when she met up with Buffy.

"...Makes a clucking sound with his tongue." Xander was saying as they walked in.

Buffy opened her mouth and said, "...Hi Giles!" Very brightly, Xander turned to see Giles behind the counter. He said nothing but raised an eyebrow at Xander. She was beginning dislike that look.

"Hey, G-Man."

Giles asked Buffy questions about Acathla.

As Xander pick up a bundle of sage that was lay next to a bowl and some other herbs she brought it up to her nose and in hailed, she loved the scent of sage. It reminded her...invoked images of...white sheets, candle light...soft music, Lindsey's low husky voice whispering with a desperate passion...her name, "Xander..."

"Xander!!"

Xander blinked and dropped the sage on the counter, "Mmm? What? Sorry."

"Are you alright?" Giles asked the now pale looking girl.

"Yeah, sure, fire away."

Giles was about to say something when Buffy exclaimed, "Oh, no! I have an English test!"

"Don't worry, they give you credit for being able to speak it." Xander told Buffy as the girl hurried to the door.

"Really? Great!" Buffy said with a smile as she left.

Xander looked down at the sage then back up, Giles caught her eye, "Well, don't they?"

Giles sighed.

***

That night Xander sat at the desk in her room. She threw down her pencil. Homework sucked. Why she was doing it? Slamming her book shut she stood up and stretched. Then there came a tapping. A _tap, tap, tapping..._ at her window. Xander pulled back the curtain and sighed. Opening the window, "Spike."

" 'Ello, luv."

The vampire and the girl stared at each other for a few minutes then finally Spike looked away.

"Hah! I won!" Xander crowed.

Spike rolled his eyes, "Yeah? So?"

"So, I won."

"And the prize?"

Xander leaned close, "Patrol. You help from now on."

Spike looked at Xander then nodded, "Tonight?"

"Tonight." Xander confirmed.

That was the best way to deal with Spike. Ask for what you knew you would already get. They weren't good yet, but it would be a start. And patrol was the best way to deal with their issues.

Or give them something to hit at the very least.

***

Xander let Spike take care of a couple minions as she walked into the Bronze. She recognized the song being played by a band that she had seen in L.A. Darling Violetta. Xander headed toward the bar and ordered a soda. She walked over to the corner that the gang had staked out for themselves. On the loveseat a brunette and redhead were wrapped around each over in a passionate embrace. Angel, Xander could sense was lurking around just out of sight. Amy and Jono were out on the dance floor while Oz was talking to Devon near the stage. Xander sat down on the arm of the overstuffed chair that Buffy was sitting in, who was at the moment, glaring at the making out girls. It was such a pretty sight Xander smirked as she said, "Don't let us interrupt."

Willow and Cordelia pulled reluctantly away from each other with a sheepish look. Xander was just about to remark when Scott Hope walked up to them.

"Hi Scott, what are you doing here?" Willow asked.

Scoot looked confused when he said, "Cordelia told me if I was here at eight I could run into Buffy," he turned to Buffy, "Hi, Buffy strange running into you like this, isn't it?"

Buffy smiled, "Hi." but shot Willow a look that said she would have words with her and Cordelia later. Scott asked Buffy if she wanted to dance and Buffy nodded getting up and following his to the dance floor.

"He seems charming and normal..." Xander said sliding off the arm and into the chair. Willow just looked happy and Cordelia looked like she couldn't care less. Amy and Oz walked up to the table and sat down in some empty chair they pulled over. When asked Oz said that Jonathan was in the restroom.

"Check out Slutty and Blast from the Past." Amy commented almost meanly earning a look of approval from Cordelia.Proving that Amy and the cheerleader were spending way too much time together. Amy pointed out the young brunette girl, dress in what bordered on slut wear, dancing with a guy that could have come off of 'That 70's Show.' Cordelia made some remark about KC and the Sunshine band. Xander wasn't really listening as she watched the girl turn to lead the guy off the dance floor and out of the Bronze. Xander had gotten a clear look at the girl's face.

"That guy doesn't thrive on a sun-shiny day. I'm going too..." Xander said as she got up and pointed in the direction the girl had gone in.

Amy got up, "I'll go with."

The two girls had picked up Jonathan after he had seen them going out the back door of the Bronze. Xander stopped and Jonathan almost ran into her, Amy just behind him. As they walked through the alley they could hear a girl complaining and the sound of something getting broken.

"It could be nothing. They could have just come out here to make out." Amy said.

They turned a corner in time to see the brunette girl pull a stake out of the waistband of her jeans as she slammed the guy into the chain link fence behind him.

"If that's making out?" Jonathan paused, "I think we're doing it wrong."

The girl shoved the stake into the guy's chest, and then there was a moment as if all time froze... the vampire burst into ashes.

The girl turned around to face them and Xander smiled. "Hello...Faith."

***

Xander had to admit that Faith had taken the whole 'I know you because of a mystical mishap type thing' Faith was a Slayer and had seen some strange stuff, very well. Sometime during the whole get to know you conversation but after Faith told them about the naked wrestling, Willow let it slip that Xander use to be a guy in the 'Before'. Which caused Faith to ask if she and Xander had been friends. The sultry tone she used to ask the question implied what kind of friends Faith thought they had been.

Xander shrugged, "You popped my cherry."

Faith blinked, "Really," she gave Xander a slow once over, "care to relive some history?"

Xander's remark of, "Thanks for the offer but you're a little late." Made some of the others go wide-eyed and Buffy gasped out, "the lawyer" in a soft tone.

Hearing Buffy, Xander growled out, "Subject change."

Willow began to tell who was dating whom, and Angel walked up to the table. Xander glared at him but kicked a chair in his direction, and Angel took that as an invite to join them. Faith looked at him for a long moment before asking if they knew he was a vamp. Buffy said yes, they knew, that he had a soul and that Faith could not stake him. Then Cordelia mention that Angel was Buffy's ex.

Faith shrugged, "Hey, you wanta do the undead that's your business." She looked at Angel, "But you look at my neck..." she trailed off leaving the threat implied. "But I have to say B. Did you miss that chapter in the handbook? We slay vamps not lay them."

Xander at that last remark could help but snigger at least until Buffy glared, "Pot to my Kettle," to Faith she muttered, "You've seen the handbook?"

Faith looked at them all and with an insight that had taken along time for Xander to learn about in the 'Before'. Faith began to name what each of the Scooby's were, as in "Queen Bitch" Cordelia, "Smart Girl" Willow... Faith decided that Angel if he had been human would have been, "So a jock," which caused Xander to snigger again, and so on in this way at least until Faith came to Xander. What Xander could be seemed to stump the dark slayer then she grinned, "...So that makes you the Slut by default." There was a collective gasp from the gang that caused a confused look to pass over Faith's face. Xander narrowed her eyes at the beta bitch; it was time to put Faith in her place within the pack. Xander leaned over into Faith's space...

"Hey, pet..."

Xander heard and saw Spike where he was leaning against a pillar, holding beer bottle by the neck.

"Hello," Faith purred at the sight of the blond. Spike glanced over at her and frowned. He looked back at Xander. Spike had overheard most of the conversation and knew the other slayer had pegged the others in the group. The last remark was bound to rile his girl's temper. Xander stood and walked over to the blond, she could hear Faith ask who Spike was and Buffy told her, that yes, Spike was a vamp, that no, he wasn't like Angel and that no again, Faith couldn't slay him and that Spike was Xander's.

"Too what?" Faith muttered.

Buffy shrugged, "I try really hard not to think about that."

Faith frowned she really didn't think it was fair that the other slayer and Xander had vamps to play with. And really good looking ones at that. She watched as the punkish looking blond smile a sweet smile at the dark haired girl as she took the beer from him and took a drink of it.

"I want to dance," Xander told Spike. He nodded as he took back the beer. Xander who had heard Faith turned back to her and could see the open look of lust on the girl's face as Faith looked at Spike. Xander walked back over to Faith, she leaned over and whispered in the other girl's ear. When Xander pulled back she could see the surprise in Faith's eyes.

"From one slut to another." Xander said mockingly, and pressed a quick kiss to the other girl's lips. The others in the group saw Faith's wide-eyed blinking after Xander had pulled away and dragged Spike on the dance floor.

It was Jonathan that finally broke the silence when he muttered, "Anyone not find that really hot?"

Faith cleared her throat and asked Buffy, "So what's with X-Girl and the Billy Idol look-a-like?"

Buffy sighed and Angel shrugged as he said, "It's complicated."

On the dance floor Spike wrapped an arm around Xander's waist. She sighed and laid her head on his shoulder.

"So... am I forgiven, Xan?"

Xander snorted at the question. Spike though took that as a 'yes' asked, "So what did you whisper in the dark ones ear, pet? To make her go all wide-eyed like that?"

"Hmm, oh that?" Xander said as she raised her head from his shoulder, "That if she didn't watch herself. She'd have an angry cheerleader in her face..." Xander looked over Spike's shoulder and moved out of his grasp just as the shriek of, _"Blondie Bear!!!"_ Was heard from across the Bronze. "Sort of, like how you're about too." Xander said with a small smirk as she walked away.

Spike grimaced as another; _"Blondie Bear!!"_ was shrieked.

***

"Nice place." Faith said as they walked into Xander's house. She noticed the garlic plants and admired the crosses craved into the porch posts. "So, why are we here instead of where ever it is where Slayers and Watchers meet? And why isn't B with us?"

"Because Buffy's Watcher is married to my mother and Buffy has to finish patrol so I could bring you here." Xander told the other girl. "Come on. Giles and Mom should be here."

They walked toward the kitchen and heard voices.

"...In Cotswolds..." That was Giles.

Xander heard her mother's low laughter.

"...A great honor! Err... So I'm told."

"So your saying you would rather be at a stuff Watcher's gathering... than here with me?" Xander could hear the pout in her mother's voice as she walked into the kitchen followed by Faith.  As they walked in to see Giles pulling Jessica into his lap then kissed her. Xander sighed, she still wasn't used to seeing Giles so affectionate. It also surprised Xander to see Giles dressed in jeans and a dress light blue shirt. Rather than the usual tweed. He and he mother must have had dinner at their favorite place earlier.

When Faith caught sight of Giles she said, "Oh, it's boring. Way to stuffy for a guy like you." That brought the attention of both adults to Xander and Faith.

"Giles, Mom, this is Faith... the Vampire Slayer." Xander introduced the girl. Jessica gave the slayer a long assessing look.

"So, there's a another slayer in town. Should be interesting." Jessica said.

"You have no idea, Mom." Xander muttered.

As the girls sat down at the table, as Giles's cell phone rang, he pulled it out said it turned out to be Buffy. Jessica got up from her husband's lap and got the things out to make hot chocolate as she did she asked, "So, Faith where are you staying?"

Faith said, "SunnyDale Motor Lodge."

"That dump?!" Jessica exclaimed with a growl, "Oh hell, no, you're not! You're going to stay here."

"Now wait a minute..." Faith tried to object.

 Jessica gave the girl a smile that caused a shiver to go through the slayer. "Don't worry, you can have the guest room. We'll get you enrolled in school tomorrow morning."

Faith blinked at that and looked at Xander who shrugged.

"B-but I'm the Slayer." Faith said weakly in protest.

"So was my sister, and she went to school." Jessica said ending that argument then and there because Faith began to ask whom and when Jessica's sister was the slayer.

After getting Faith's things from the Lodge, the night was uneventfully. Except for the whole shower thing. Faith swore she hadn't known Xander was in there.

***

Xander wasn't sure how her mother did it, and Xander was pretty sure she didn't want to know. Faith was now a student of SunnyDale High. Xander and Willow had been given the duty of showing Faith around the school.

"...And there is where I was almost mauled by a demon!" Willow told Faith, pointing down an empty hall.

"Over there is where Xander was almost killed by Spike... Or at least that's what Buffy said." Willow told Faith after seeing Xander's hard look.

Faith frowned and asked Xander, "You're messing around with a vamp that tried to kill you?"

"What? Only Buffy's allowed to do that?" Xander snarled. She stopped and backtracked, "Not that there has been any messing with per say. I'm not messing with Spike!"

Willow gave Xander a sympathetic look, as she took Faith by the arm turning toward the landing, " It's a thing. A weird thing, that no one really gets, best just not to go there."

"Thanks Wills," Xander drawled out.

Willow shrugged she didn't get the thing between Xander and the blond vamp, but the few times she had seen them together... Well, Willow couldn't deny there was something there so strong you could almost touch it. "...And there," Willow said pointing to a piece of ground next to the fountain in the courtyard, "was where I was almost sucked into a muddy grave."

"And they say you can't learn anything thing in high school." Xander said leaning on the concrete banister, "But we have learned to be afraid."

Faith gave a laugh, "You guys are something. If I had friends like you in my old school..."

"Now you do." Willow said firmly. She could see how lonely Faith was, just how Cordelia had been before, Willow could see the mask Faith wore was cracking. She exchanged a look with Xander wondering if she was seeing the same thing.

"Do what?" Faith asked confused.

Xander nodded to Willow but answered Faith, "Have friends."

"Best of..."Willow said then quoting the saying Oz had started, "We live fast..."

"And hopefully never die." Xander finished causing Willow to grin.

Faith smiled at them, "You two are a trip!" She hadn't thought friendship could come so easy, but these two seemed so free in the affording of it. Then she saw Buffy walk up a set of stair across the way asked, "So, what's up with B? I mean she seems nice and all if a little uptight. Not like you and Red."

Xander shook her head, "Issues." As Buffy bumped into Scott Hope, Xander saw them began a conversation as Scott helped Buffy pick up her books.

"He's cute." Faith said.

Scott walked Buffy to her next class still talking. Buffy's new quest for normality just might be her ending. Xander thought badly, "Buffy seems to think so," was all Xander said.

***

While Faith had diner with Buffy and Joyce, Xander walked into the mansion on Crawford Street. She knew Angel was still staying here, why? Well, Xander thought it was some weird form of self-punishment. The statue of Alcatha had been moved to a safe location by the Council a couple of months ago from what Giles had told Xander. She stared at the spot where the statue had been.

The blood of a demon had opened a portal to hell.

Her blood... Always blood...

Xander didn't know how long she stood there before she became aware of Spike standing next to her. "What are you doing here?"

Spike shrugged, "The poof said I could stay..."

"Why would you want to?" Xander gasped out, the memories of what had happened to Spike... to her... to them here were near the surface of her memory.

"Better than a crypt or, well... the Motor Lodge..."

Well when he put it that way...

"Spike, I need you to do something for me." Xander said.

Spike paused in the middle of lighting a cigarette. "What?"

***

"You know the guest room is nice."

Xander turned over in bed and saw Faith leaning against her door.

"How'd patrol with Buffy go?" Xander said sitting up.

"I think we understand each other."

"Really?" Xander asked put could see something was off with Faith, "You ok?"

Faith spread her arms, "I'm five by five. Just wondering what you're problem is."

Xander wasn't awake enough to follow Faith logic. "What are you talking about?" Xander asked as she got up out of bed.

Faith said, "I'm just saying that maybe you and B have been doing the slay thing too long. That maybe it's time for younger blood to take over."

Xander couldn't believe what Faith was saying. It was crazy talk. And Xander's lack of sleep made her temper snap, she growled as her eyes went a glowing green, "If you have something say, Faith... Then say it!"

Faith grinned, B had told her about Xander. About the other girl being a Primal Goddess or something. Faith wanted to see it, maybe even fight Xander when she was like this. Or maybe...

"Does it have anything to do with the lawyer?" the slayer implied silkily.

Xander had Faith's back against the wall in the hallway and before she knew it Xander's arm was across the slayer's neck.

"What do you know about that?" Xander asked her voice hard and tone cold.

"Only what B said."

" 'B'" Xander said stressing Faith's nickname for the blond slayer, "Doesn't know _anything_ and neither do _you."_

"I know you need to move on from what happen."

Xander leaned close inches, from Faith's face, her eyes lost their demonic glow, "I don't want to talk about 'the lawyer' or anything else in my life... Which is by the way... Is just that, my life."

"What are you getting so strung out for, X?"

"Why are your lips still moving, F?"

Faith licked her lips, "That a threat?"

Xander leaned closer, "More of a promise..."

"Wow? You really think you could take me?' Faith whispered against Xander's cheek.

"I know I..." Was all Xander got out before Faith kissed her, hard, deep, with tongue?  Xander was so surprised she dropped her arm from Faith's neck. Xander could only blink wide-eyed cause, you know, Faith! With kissage! And whoa! Naughty touching! Oh, so that's what this was about! Those needs slayers had after slaying...

Faith's hands began to wander... It had been awhile since Xander had kissed or been kissed by a woman. She had forgotten how nice girls smelled, how soft they were to touch... _Okay that was enough_. Xander thought when Faith's hand squeezed her breast lightly, this has to stop. But Xander's hands were in Faith's dark hair and Xander was roughly kissing Faith back. When Xander finally pulled away, it was because air had become something of an issue, she saw that Faith eyes were blown wide with arousal. She was panting just as hard for breath her breath as Xander was she gave Xander a shy smile.

Xander dropped her forehead to Faith's sighing, "You are something..."

"Yeah?"

"Oh, yeah...But this can't..."Xander muttered, and tried to remember why they couldn't.

"Because of the 'Before'?" Faith asked with an insight that continued to amaze Xander.

Xander nodded.

"To bad," Faith muttered softly, "we could be good together."

Xander bark out a laugh, "Faith, we would be amazing together."

Faith looked away from Xander as she nodded.

"Faith," Xander said, touching the other girl's chin and raising her head so the other girl would look at her, "I have issues... You have issues... And it would not... Now's not...Damn it." Xander muttered, here was Faith all soft and warm in her arms and Xander had to be a grown-up and do what was best for them and not what she had really wanted to do since she had seen the dark- haired girl again.

It wasn't fair.

Xander sighed, "Faith, I don't need a lover, a girlfriend or boyfriend right now. But Faith...I do need a friend."

Faith had to admit as let downs go it was one of the nicest... In fact it was the first one she had ever got, so yes, it was nice. "A friend, huh?" Xander nodded looking just as unhappy as Faith felt. Because she thought Xander had wanted her after that kiss she gave her in the Bronze when they had met. Maybe she had miss read something?

Faith nodded, "Yeah, I can be that."

***

Jessica returned to her bedroom after the two girls had returned to theirs. What she had seen hadn't really surprised her.  Xander had been a boy in their old time line. But the choice Xander had made, maybe did. It would have been easy for Xander to use Faith to push away her pain. It had made Jessica very proud that Xander had chosen not to do that but to ask instead for friendship. Jessica knew Xander had been hurting since she had come back from L.A. But didn't really know why. But knew that Lindsey MacDonald had something to do with it.

***

, "...You and Faith have different temperaments." Giles said to Xander as they walked to the library.

"That just it. We don't. We have the same one. Faith's not playing with...she needs help Giles. Whatever made her run to us... It's bad." Xander said as she pushed open the library door.

"Aren't you being..."

"No. Giles, Faith ended up in _jail_ in the 'Before'. We have to keep that from happening again."

"Alright Xander. I'll see if I can reach the retreat and talk to Faith's Watcher."

"Thanks, Giles."

"It's about time you two got here!" Buffy said she was sitting on one of the tables. "Giles do you know what the name 'KissAstos' means?"

Giles frowned.

"Kakistos, Giles, she means Kaistos." Xander translated. The name sounded vaguely familiar to Xander.

Buffy glared at her, "That's what I said!"

"Where did you hear that name from?" Giles asked.

"On patrol last night. Some vamps me and Faith ran into last night shouted' For KissAss we live' or something like it. All I know is that it caused Faith to freak."

Giles nodded and went in to his office and a moment later returned with a book, "Kakistos is Greek. It means 'the worst of the worst'. It's also the name of a vampire so old that his hands and feet are cloven." He told them as he leafed through the book.

Buffy looked thoughtful before she said," So, this guy just shows up at the same time the newest little slayer does? Hmm, I don't buy it."

Giles looked up, "You think they are connected?"

"There are no coincidences on the Hellmouth, Giles." Xander said with a small snort.

Buffy nodded, "Get England on the phone. Xander and I will talk to Faith. See what Kakcheck rings..."

"Kakistos..."Giles muttered.

But the two girls were already out the door. They ran into Scott Hope just down the hall from the library. The last thing Xander wanted to do was watch this thing developing between the slayer and the boy.

"Scott!" Buffy said in surprise.

Xander shook her head, "Buff, I'll talk to Faith. You talk to Hope here."

"Really?" Buffy asked hopefully.

"Sure, why not? One of us should be normal, right?"

Xander watched as Scott lead Buffy down the hall. But it wasn't them she was seeing...

_A beat up red truck, sitting on a darken street corner, as rain poured down..._ _Soaked to the bone, water running in her face..._ _Lindsey's blinding smile..._

A hand touched her shoulder startling he rout of the remembrance. She shoved it off her shoulder without looking at the person.

"Are you alright, Xander?"

Xander turned away from looking at Buffy and Hope, as she wiped away a stray tear. She nodded to Giles.

"Did you get the retreat?"

He nodded.

"Her watcher's dead."

Giles look surprised at Xander's statement, "No, she is in the hospital in Boston. Her condition is very grave. But she is alive."

Xander blinked. _Okay, that didn't happen 'Before'_.

When Xander finally found Faith she was with Amy and Jonathan.

"...And that's what really happened to Bigfoot." Faith said with a grin to them then noticed Xander.

"Hey, X! What's the Happs?"

Xander grabbed Faith's arm, "We need to chat. You can wow Ams and Jono with tales of your daring-do later." She pulled Faith away leaving the other two looking confused. Xander found an empty classroom and shoved Faith into it.

"What's the problem?" Faith asked.

"A vamp named Kakistos."

Faith looked taken back that Xander knew that name, "What do you know about Kakistos?"

"That he's here..."

Faith shook her head. "He can't be here."

"No happy to see old friends?" Xander asked.

"No, you don't understand." Faith growled, "He can't be here because Kakistos is dead. I killed him."

Xander blinked, other change how interesting, "Okay, that would explain why minions of said dead vamp are here...only not."

***

In the library, Giles looked at the two girls, "Tell us about Trick, Faith."

Faith growled at the name, "He's Kakistos second in command. His childe, I think."

"What did Trick do to you, Faith?" Xander asked seeing Faith's reaction to Trick's name, "Your shaking like a leaf."

Faith sighed, "It's what I did to him, I killed his Maker. He swore revenge. He killed Diana, my Watcher. I ran after that."

Xander exchanged a look with Giles then said, "No, Faith your Watcher is alive."

"What? No... I saw..." Faith stumbled out.

"She's in the hospital in Boston. She's still very hurt but she will live." Giles said softly.

"Really, because I saw...she really will be okay?" Faith asked in a small voice.

"Yes, Faith." Giles said.

"Oh, thank god!" Faith whispered.

"Look Faith you're not alone anymore. We can help you. But you have to trust me." Xander told the slayer.

Faith frowned, because trust was not an easy thing to just give.

***

Patrol that night was to be Restfield Cemetery. Willow had been looking at the Obits and at least four new burials were due to BBQ forks. Xander and Faith were the ones doing patrol because Buffy had her first date with Scott Hope. Faith had just dust the third riser when clamping came from the shadows.

"Well done, _Beautiful Death_..."An African American man, wearing a suit he looked like he belong running a business, stepped out into the moonlight. Beautiful Death was another name the demon world had for the slayer because they were younger girls and always very good looking.

"Trick..."Faith whispered going pale.

Xander could smell the other minions in the shadows. She grabbed Faith's hand her as the vampire casually strolled closer.

"Let's bolt!" Xander hissed as she began to run dragging Faith behind her. She could hear the vampire's laughter as he said, "MacDonald sends his regards!"

Xander and Faith dodged tombstones and statues pausing only to stake the minions that got to close for comfort. Xander lead Faith to a nearby crypt, they slammed the door open, startling the blond vampire wearing his demon face sitting on the burial tombstone. "About time you got here, pet!"

Faith glared at the vampire grabbing him by his duster lapel, "What's you doing here? Is this a trap? You working for him!"Spike looked disgusted at the hand Faith had on his coat then knocked her hand off him. It caused Faith to growl and step towards him. Spike being Spike just growled back.

Xander sighed and leaned against the door of the crypt, "Chill, Faith! He's here because I asked him." Spike walked over to a dark colored tarp, he kicked it aside revealing a trap door.

"Why?" Faith asked just as a pounding knock came on the door of the crypt. Xander moved out of the way just as the door flew open. If Xander had still been there she would have been squished.

"The plan is about to go all to hell." Spike muttered.

"When don't they?" Xander groaned.

The vampire Trick, walked into the crypt followed by a couple of his fledges. He blinked when he saw the blond vampire, "Spike?"

"Mr.Trick." Spike said with a regal nod.

"You know him?" Xander asked surprised.

Spike sighed, "Met him a few years back."

Trick nodded, "Just after the Boxer Rebellion wasn't it? Just after your first Slayer. By the way don't you owe me twenty quid?"

"X, what are they talking about?" Faith asked and Xander tried to wave the question away. Now was not the time. "Xander!"

"I'll tell you later! Now..."

"Yes, now..."Trick purred, "I get to have my _Beautiful Death."_

Faith backed away from the vampire until her back hit the stonewall of the crypt. Xander tried to get between them but Spike got a hand around her upper arm and would not let go. Trick said something to Faith that caused a dark look to cross her face and Faith punched him in the face. Trick grinned and backhanded the dark slayer, causing her to slam back into the wall.

"Spike!" Xander hissed as Spike pulled her over to the stone tomb he had been sitting on earlier.

"She has to face this... Him." Spike growled into Xander's ear. Yeah, Xander knew that. Didn't mean she had to like it. Spike leaned against the tomb with Xander at his side. He tapped her arm and pointed to a rope. Xander followed the rope with her eyes then grinned at Spike. The two fledges that had come in with Trick growled at Spike and Xander. They exchanged a look and exploded in to action. Spike hit one of the fledges and they went sprawling on to the floor of the crypt.

Faith pushed away from the wall. She had never been so afraid. This vampire had bested her before. Almost killed her watcher, and had threaten to turn Faith into a vampire. He had touched on all the fears every slayer ever had. 

Xander jumped on the stone tomb, and kicked the other fledge in the face knocking it to the ground. She pulled the boot dagger she always wore and reached up to cut the rope that Spike had pointed out to her, went the fledge she kicked slammed into legs knocking her of the tomb back behind it with the fledge on top of her.

Spike had tore the head off the fledge he was fighting in time to see Xander go down behind the tomb. Spike jumped over the tomb and slammed a stake into the fledge's back that was about to take a bit out of Xander.

When the settled Xander looked up and saw Spike, "Thanks," she said holding up her hand. Spike grabbed it and pulled her to her feet.

Trick had Faith shoved against the wall, one of his hands her clenched in the slayer's dark hair. He was pulling on it, yanking her head back to expose her neck. His beautiful death was finally going to be his...

"Hey Ugly!"

Trick turned, his hold on Faith loosened, she shoved her fist into his stomach, and slipped out of his arms. Trick saw the Hyena standing on the tomb, with Spike as he leaned against it casually smoking a cigarette. The Hyena gave a cackling laugh just a huge wooden stake, the size of a log, flew straight towards him.

"Well, sh-" was all Trick got out before the stake slammed into him turning him into nothing but dust.

"And that, pet, is why those sort of vendettas went out of style." Spike said, solemnly to Xander.

Xander rubbed a hand over her face, "I don't know about you two but I want some hot chocolate."

"You want chocolate right know?" Faith asked.

Xander shrugged, "Don't you?"

"Well, actually..." Faith purred dropping an arm over Xander's shoulders.

"Right, Lady Jessica's hot chocolate it is!" Spike said shoving Faith's arm off of Xander

"Come on, if we tell mom it was a near death thing... We might get the little marshmallows!" Xander said not looking at them so she missed the heated glares the slayer and vampire were casting at each other.

***

"...The Council has approved our request. Faith is to stay until her Watcher is fill recovered." Giles told the group of teenagers sitting around the table in the library.

"Great. Faith still has things to learn." Xander said with a grin.

Faith stuck her tongue out at Xander.

"Oh, she's going to fit in just fine around here." Jonathan said with a snicker.

***

Mayor Wilkins made an tsk-tsk sound when he read the report handed to Lindsey MacDonald. "Mr. Tick had such potential, too."

"Yes, sir."

The mayor looked at the blond man who had spoke.

"You do plan to do better that our newly departed Mr. Tick."

"Yes, sir."

 


	14. Slice of Life...

Faith walked into the school library she was looking for Xander. Faith couldn't believe how much she was enjoying the whole school thing. Friends really did make a difference. True some people in the school referred to her a slut or shank because of how she wore her make-up or clothes. Those people didn't matter. Just X' and the gang and they had never treated her that way. Well, Red's Cheer Bitch did. But Faith had noticed that Cordelia didn't seem to like any of Scoobies but Red and sometimes X. Xander, Faith could see, was standing on a table sword in hand as she squared off against the Idol want- to- be. Faith had to admit the blond vamp had some moves. Xander was backing way, the vampire advance with a lethal grin. Xander continued to back up until she was standing at the very edge of the table. Spike swung his sword and Xander jumped back off the table to the ground.

"Ah, come on! Xan! Where is the challenge?"

"It's not fair! You know sword play is not my strong suit." Xander said with a pout, "I'm better with an axe."

"Pet," Spike said after giving the girl a long meaningful look, "I'm willing to fight you with any weapon, even without one. But not an axe." He twisted the sword in a complicated kata, "I like my head where it is!"

"How long are you going to hold that against me!"

X had explained about the 'Before' as she called it to Faith. Faith knew that she had done some bad and good. She knew as long as X had her back she wasn't going to go down the dark path. But sometimes she wished she knew what Xander was talking about.

Especially when Xander and Spike were together.

"How long are you going to hold..."

"Stop right there!" Xander growled.

Now was one of those times.

"Lady Disdain, are you yet living?" Spike asked with a smirking grin. It was some sort of quote Faith was sure, she just didn't know from what it was from. Swords moving faster than lightening, metal against metal crashing together sounded like thunder. The fight took the two combatants all around the library. Over the tables, around the book stacks,  back on top of the tables again. Spike jumped up on top of one of the book stacks it sway back and forth only one or two of the books came out of it. When Spike gave Xander a two- finger salute.

Which caused Xander to snarl out, "Not anytime soon!"

Faith watched with amazement as Xander jumped from the table, up on to a book stack herself and slash at Spike with her sword. The book stack swayed causing Xander to change her stance, Spike pushed for the advantage but found himself shoved back. This caused him to lose his balance; he dropped his sword almost falling. The momentum of this caused the book stack to sway harder and faster until... the stack fell over taking Spike and Xander with it.

Faith could only stare, Xander and Spike rolled away from the downed stack. It had hit the one next to it and caused an ensuing domino effect with the other books around the library; the last book stack fell and hit the card catalogue causing the drawers to come open and cards to fly out of it. Faith snickered when Xander looked around the library, and saw the bookshelves leaning on each other and one completely on the floor, causing her to muttered, "Giles is going to kill me!"

***

" _Don't wanna be out done...I wanna be second to none...I wanna be the hero not the zero to everyone!"_ Jonathan sang on stage with the Dingoes. It was the second song he had sung that night to the surprise of the gang Jonathan had a really good voice.

The Scoobies were sitting at a table near the stage. Xander leaned over and asked Amy, "So, what did you and Oz promise him in order to get him up there?"

"Oz and I promised to go to the ComicCon when they hold it in L.A." Amy said with a sigh.

"I wanna take the throne and hog the microphone...I wanna to sing the greatest record you will ever own!" Jonathan sang with flourish. Xander had to admit he did The Deleted song justice. The fact that it was a song for a popular kid's anime just revealed how cool Jonathan thought he was. Oz and Jonathan stood back to back, while Oz played his guitar and Jonathan belted out the lyrics.

"He's pretty damn good for a geek!" Faith yelled out from her sit next to Xander. Xander looked around the Bronze. The crowd did look like they were enjoying the music and the singer. But anything besides Devon and his Emo slash Angst music was a treat.

_"Just another boy with blind ambition!!!"_

***

Xander sighed as she was dragged down the street by Buffy. Faith trailed behind them laughing. Buffy and Willow had decided that since they had won the talent show last year to enter it again this year. Cordelia and Amy had the bright idea that all six of them stood a chance at winning, it if they could just agree on what to sing. Xander knew the only way they would win was if Cordelia didn't sing with them and told the girl so. Xander received the Queen C glare for her honesty.

"Oh, wow! That would look so great on me!" Cordelia exclaimed as she stared in the window of SunnyDale's most expensive clothing store.

Buffy shook her head, "Cordelia, I think even your parents would notice that sizable chunk taken out of their credit card."

Cordelia sniffed in disdain at the blond slayer, "Maybe, but since Xander warned me about what the IRS was going to do. I told Daddkins and he went to our accountant and fired him. The new one straightened all that mess out. And that white leather jacket would be perfect with my complexion!"

Xander shook her head, "No jacket is worth six hundred dollars, Cordelia!"

***

Xander banged her head on the table. Then did it again, she looked up but the scene in front of her didn't change. Buffy, Cordelia, Amy, Willow and... God help her, even Faith were giving her 'the puppy eyes'.

She was doomed!

***

Spike walked into the library, weaving through the book stacks. It had taken him and Xan almost two days to put the library back to how the Watcher had it.

Thank god for the basement entrance that was connected to the sewers. It made coming and going much easier during the day.  Xander was supposed to meet him thirty minutes ago for patrol. He could hear the old 80's tune start to play but for the unlife of him couldn't figure out why! Spike saw the Wolf and the Geek sitting at a table he walked over and sat down next to the Wolf. Ever since he started to patrol regular-like with the Scoobies he had noticed that they accepted his presence warily. Just as they should! He was still the Big Bad. And nothing would change that! The Slayers could threaten him all they wanted. He was going to protect his Xan-pet!

"What's going on, mate?"

Oz gave the vampire a long look. "Just wait."

Spike shrugged. Then all the bints but Xander came prancing out in little skirts, waving pom-poms, dressed as bloody cheerleaders and singing to the music playing. Spike couldn't help the slow grin that crossed his face. Now this was a show alright!

Suddenly Spike felt hands on his shoulders as a voice sang in his ear, "... _You're so pretty_!" He turned to face Xander, " _Can't you understand...its guys like you..."_ Spike could only gap as he took in the sight of him.

Xander noticing Spike's look, "What can I say? The girls can talk me into doing anything." she said unhappily.

Spike did not take his eyes off of Xander, "They used puppy eyes, huh?"

Xander nodded, "And the pouty lips..."

"Then you had no choice." Spike said distracted as Xander walked past him the little skirt that barely covered her ass...assets.

"No, no I didn't!" Xander said shaking a pom-pom at Spike.

***

Xander was hungry so she went into the kitchen. Giles was pacing and talking on the phone. Xander opened a cabinet door and stared forlornly, Mother Hubbard's Cubbard was distressingly bare. She closed the door with a sigh. Giles's conversation was not a happy one. If all the British slang being thrown around with the curse words punctuating Giles sentences were anything to go by. Her eyes widen as Giles muttered a really foul curse in Feyler. It was one that Xander had never heard before and made a note to ask Spike what it meant the next time she saw him.

"Are you sure to was Ethan Rayne? Los Angles is a big city." Giles told the person he was speaking to, he then turned and noticed Xander then to the phone told the person to hold on, "Jessica is working a double shift tonight, I thought we could order out?"

And that was why Giles was the best...Well, that's why he was just the best!

"Pizza?" Xander asked.

Giles shook his head, "Two nights ago."

Oh, yeah. Delivery guy had been a vamp.

"Chinese?"

"Two weeks ago."

Right, some sort of dragon-demon hybrid thing...

"Sushi?"

Giles paused looking thoughtful then nodded, " I'll place the order when I'm done."

Xander left the kitchen hearing Giles say, "How the bloody hell did Ethan do that?!"

***

The locker door slammed suddenly, Xander looked up from tying her brown Doc Martin boots. Amy stood there almost growling. She had been acting strangely since the whole Slay Fest thing... Slay Fest... That had to have been Lindsey's idea. Lindsey it seemed had not taken Xander's breaking up with him well at all. Xander couldn't go anywhere that Lindsey didn't show up at a few minutes later except when she was at school. He had been making some trouble for Xander and her mom. Mostly it was little things. Parking tickets that Jessica got and paid were suddenly coming up as not have been. Jessica's student loans all came due at the same time. Although Jessica had told Xander that she still thought she had a few years on them. It was when the bank tried to foreclose on an all ready completely paid for house, Xander's, that she'd had enough and confronted Lindsey. Telling him to back off, that whole stalker thing was so last year, and Angelus had done a better job of it.

Amy and Faith had been kidnapped and had to fight a couple of vampires and demons. The minions in charge had thought they had gotten Buffy and herself. Faith had said she never wanted to piss off the blonde witch. And to never let her near phone cord or pliers. Apparently Amy had a mean streak.

"Something wrong, Ams?"

"Men are so stupid!"

Xander having been a man once could say nothing to that but asked, "Why are they stupid?"

"They won't decide who will be my date for Homecoming."

Xander was confused, "Does it matter?"

Amy flash Xander an annoyed look, "Yes, it matters." Amy said slowly, "Whichever is my date for Homecoming the other will be my date for the Prom."

"Why not go with both? You are dating both Oz and Jonathan."

Amy sighed, "Because,"

"Because why?"

"Because the world doesn't work that way, okay Xander!" Amy muttered as she opened her locker.

"Well it should."

Amy sighed, "I know."

***

Lindsey MacDonald shook his head as he pushed away from the wall he had been shoved into by the blond vampire. He had known it was a matter of time before Spike would come looking for him. Lindsey had the best information connections he knew when the vampire had started hunting with Xander. That it was just a matter of time before he would see the blond. What he didn't understand was why the vamp seemed to be holding a grudge against him. One that seemed to have nothing to do with Xander at all!

"You're acting like I wronged you in another life, vampire!" Lindsey snarled.

Spike paused his fist inches from the lawyer's face, "You could say that."

***

Spike walked out of the building, he stopped to light a cigarette. Then rubbed his left arm on the spot where it had been cut off in the 'Before'. Spike had issues he knew this and he dealt with them the way any self- respecting vamp would.

With Violence!

His association with the white hats was making him soft, he thought. Spike had left the lawyer alive. A mistake he was sure would come back to haunt him.

When Spike glanced up he saw Xander leaning against his DeSoto. Xander didn't look upset but she didn't look pleased either. He had told her about the Wolfram & Hart lawyer that had tricked him in the 'Before' but he had never told Xander the guy's name. Spike after finding out about Lindsey and what had happen between the two. Wondered if it would have happened at all if Spike had just mentioned the bastard's name! Spike had never liked feeling guilty. It was the sole purpose for his visit to the Lindsey's office.

"Feel better?" Xander asked her voice cold.

Spike said nothing just walked around to the driver's side of the car and got in. He started the car, it roared to life with a low purr. It didn't surprise him when the passenger side opened and the dark haired girl got in.

 "Got a story to tell..." Spike took a draw off his cigarette, "About a bloke named Doyle


	15. Revelations With Bandy Candy

Lindsey stalked into the Bronze. To say that the last week had been bad would've been a laugh! Lindsey thought that the kid, he had arranged to find the Hyde formula. Would have been more than obsess over his girlfriend or get eaten by a werewolf. He growled to himself, Xander and the rest of the so-called Scooby's were more of a problem than Lindsey first thought they would be. Lindsey couldn't even talk to Xander alone without Summers butting in or that what was her name? Fate, Destiny, whatever the other Slayer was called, being there. Of course what really pissed him off was that he got threaten in his own office by that blond punk vampire! As Lindsey walked up to the bar he didn't even want to think about the shit storm Slay Fest caused. Stupid minions! Couldn't even grab the right girls! The little blond witch and the new slayer were not the ones who were suppose to be grabbed! Then the whole thing with Post and the Glove! Lindsey wasn't sure how many more failures he was going to be allowed before the Mayor or Wolfram&Hart did something.

Something permanent.

Lindsey ordered his drink as he looked around nothing but stupid teenagers. Who would more than likely going to end up as nothing more than lunch later tonight? Lindsey's gaze fell on the dark haired girl at the pool table. The slayer looked to be scamming a couple of male collage- aged students out of their money. He watched the girl until after the two had left, the slayer's expression turned sour.

This was not a happy girl.

Lindsey took the beer bottle from the bartender, slowly made his way over to the pool table. The slayer paused when she caught sight of him then slowly put the pool table between them, she lined up the pool cue for a shot, ignoring the blond man for the moment.

"Hello..." Lindsey paused, "Faith, isn't it?" Yes, that was her name, he thought.

Faith gave him a slow once over, yeah, he was pretty and from what little Xander had said pretty dangerous too. Just her type of guy. She smiled slowly, "You play?"

Lindsey shook his head as he took a drink of his beer, "Not with a shark like you."

Faith shrugged, leaned over and took the shot she had lined up, sinking the red- stripped ball in to a side pocket.

"I'm Lindsey." He said with all the down home charm he could muster.

Faith nodded, "The lawyer, yeah, I know."

Lindsey shrugged, "It's a job. It's not like I'm a demon or say a...vampire."

Faith frowned, as she wondered where this was leading to, she leaned on the pool table, "Isn't that an oxymoron? The whole evil lawyer thing?"

Lindsey shook his head, "No, it's a cliché."

"Oh, right."

"But it's better than being a Watcher with the ambitions to rule the world..."

Faith glared at the man, "You're well informed." She muttered as she settled in to a position to take another shot. When she did hit the blue ball onto a corner pocket.

"Have to be in my line of work."

Faith growled, "They were right not to trust her. I still can believe I fell for her line of bullshit!" The last most said to herself in disbelief.

"Hey," Lindsey said holding up a hand, "Not judging you. After all you are a slayer and slayer's listen to their watchers. Just the way it is."

"Post wasn't my watcher!"

Lindsey shrugged, "None of my business."

Faith getting tried of his conversation asked, "Then what is your business?"

"Xander..."

"Xander doesn't want anything to do with you!" Faith snarled at him. The guy had a one-track mind. All the trouble he caused X' and Lady J' was so not cool. "You really need to move on. She has!"

Lindsey frowned, "With Spike, right?"

Faith nodded. It was the only answer she really knew. Xander so far had resisted all her plays at seduction. And if Faith was honest with herself that's all it had been...play. Don't get her wrong, she liked Xander and if things...life were different...but it wasn't. Faith was happy that the primal goddess girl was her friend. And add in the fact, that damned vamp was always in her way, sparring with Xander, or acting like fucking Romeo or something with the late night talks at X's window. And sometimes she would swear B' and Fang were running interference for Spike, whenever they saw that Faith was making some head way with X, those two always said or did some thing to distract Xander away from Faith. It was annoying. There had to be more history there than she had been told when it came to X' and that damned vampire. Faith really hadn't stood a chance.

"You have to wonder about Xander's thinking, you know." Lindsey said suddenly breaking Faith's thoughts.

"Huh?" Faith asked confused.

"Well, Xander is taking advice from two vampire that did torture her after all."

Faith frowned, "What are you talking about?"

Lindsey had to be careful not to let his glee show, "Why don't you join me at a table," he turned away from her but looked over his shoulder and said, "and I'll tell you all about it."

Faith looked at him a long moment, Lindsey had been nothing but a problem to Xander and the gang, but she wanted to know about the things that the others would only whisper about and then would fall quiet when Xander came into the room. The things she had heard Jessica talk softly about to Giles about in the early morning hours when X was on patrol with Buffy.

Faith watched as Lindsey found a seat nearby and sat down. She thought for a long moment, then took one more shot, the ball bounce off the corner pocket, rolled across the table then hit the side of the table bouncing back and into the side pocket, sinking the eight ball. She tossed the pool cue down, and joined Lindsey at his table.

***

Spike twirled the unlit cigarette between his thumb and forefinger, as he watched the Angel and Buffy spar. He had to admit the slayer was a powerhouse, and her fighting skills had gotten even better since she had starting these sparring sessions with them. Not that he'd ever tell Buffy that. Buffy as far as he could see was nothing like they way she had been in those last years of the 'Before'. She seemed more carefree and at easy but could also be whiney and immature. Buffy had complained for a week about what a jerk that Hope guy had been. Breaking up with her before the Homecoming Dance and all. Really, what had the Slayer expected? When she was late or broke more dates than she actually went on with the boy, just so she could spend time with Angel? That whole seeing other people thing? Only worked when you actually 'did' see other people. Spike sighed, "Slayer! You're leaving your left side open."

"I'm not!"

"You are. Stop it!"

Buffy swung at Angel, who blocked her. They were sparing in front of the fireplace.

"Who made you the sparring teacher?" She growled as she tried to kick Angel. He grabbed her ankle and yanked her off balance, making her hit the ground.

"I'm watching you make mistakes. Which if this were real, it would get you killed!" Spike growled at her, "So listen and guard your left!" Spike heard Buffy muttered something under her breath about his parentage which he ignore as he sat down on the arm of the small sofa.

When the stake came flying through the air, Buffy's hand snapped out and caught it inches from Angel's chest.

 It was a surprise to say the least.

"What the..." Spike said as he stood up dropping the cigarette he had been playing with. He went into his game face, noticing that Angel did as well while taking a defense standance. Sniffing the air Spike caught the scent of lust, old death, and darkness...a tingle went down his spine...'Slayer'...Spike's senses told him. It was a much better lure than the coy lemon-vanilla and sunshine scent that Buffy carried. _Why'd the Dark Slayer wanted to dust the Poof_? Spike didn't know or really care. Angel needed dusting in Spike's opinion. Not that anyone ever asked him for it. Spike actually liked Faith. She was a better fighter than Buffy and had the dark sense of humor both shared by him and Xander. What he didn't like was the bint's constant flirting with his girl. "Faith..."Spike muttered, now he had to worry about... Another stake came flying out of the shadows, this one he had to dodge. Now that wasn't right, trying to kill him. Spike hadn't done anything more than insult Faith once or a hundred times. The bloody bint had given as well as she got. So there was no reason for her to do this! The dark slayer slowly came out of the shadows. The back of the sofa was to her and between her and Angel who she was aiming at.

"I know what you did to her!" Faith snarled at them. Spike and Angel shared a confused look with each other.

"To who Faith?" Buffy asked inching around Angel so she could get closer to Faith.

"Stop moving B!" Faith said now pointing the crossbow at Buffy. "How could you? How could you let them live after what they did to her?!!"

"And what, exactly is it," Spike looked down at the sofa, "that we're being accused of?"

"What you did to Xander! I was told about how you tortured her. How you're still manipulating her!"

"And where or should I say who," Xander's voice drawled, "did you hear," Xander sat up from where she had been laying down on the sofa. Her expression grumpy, "that from?"

"You're supposed to be on patrol." Faith said shocked to see the other girl here.

Xander shrugged, "Got done early. Thought I'd come by and watch Buffy kick Deadboy's ass. That's always a treat."

"But..."

"But the real question is," Xander said cutting Faith off. Xander's voice was hard when she asked, "why are you trying to kill Angel and Spike?"

***

Xander muttered curses under her breath as Faith followed a few steps behind her. They had just walked Buffy to her house. After listening as Buffy scathingly bitch out Faith for trying to kill Angel for the second time. The first was when Post had told Faith that Angel was after the Glove.

"X, are you mad at me?" Faith asked in a small voice.

Xander sighed it wasn't Faith she was mad at. No, that was reserved for a certain lawyer.

"Faith, please do me a favor. Don't listen to anything Lindsey has to say. Ever!"

***

The next afternoon Lindsey was sitting in his office doing some research for the main office when his door slammed open.Xander Harris stood there looking beautifully enraged. She stalked over to him stopped only by his desk. She leaned over it bracing herself with her hands as she growled, "Perhaps, I didn't make myself clear the last time I was here?"

"I remember a vague conversation about leaving your mother alone." Lindsey said with a smirk.

Xander nodded, "So that's how you want to be? Fine! You want to pick a fight with me? Alright, go right a head."

When Lindsey started to lean back, not liking the way her voice took on that menacing tone, she struck quicker than a viper. Grabbing him by his necktie and hauling him across the desk.

"Let me be very clear this time," Xander's eyes glowed, "You do not use my mother or my friends against me. You want a fight? You fight me! And only me, do you understand?"

Lindsey nodded quickly. He had never been on this side of Xander's temper before. Lindsey was surprised that he found her so frightening, but she was. He now understood why SunnyDale's Underground was scared of the Hyena.

Xander let Lindsey go with a small shove that sent him back in his seat. "Go back to the L.A. Office, there's nothing for you here."

"Why do you say that?"

Xander let out a small laugh, "Do you really believe that this," Xander waved a hand around the small office, " in a shithole town, is a promotion? This is their way of getting rid of you. And when you become a victim of the Hellmouth? Well, let's just say... Wolfram & Hart's hands stay relatively clean."

Lindsey frowned.

"Tell me something? Did you sign any contracts when you joined Wolfram & Hart?" Xander asked suddenly and out of nowhere it seemed to him.

Lindsey said nothing.

Xander shrugged and turned to the door. Looking over her shoulder she threw out, "You might want to look them up, do a little research." As she walked out Lindsey heard her say, "I hear those contracts have some nasty little clauses."

***

Spike was sitting in the library reading a book, when the group of teenagers that were normally here by now came stumbling in laughing and carrying on they were followed by the Watcher and Lady Jessica. Who were smiling at the antics of the girls, the girls were all dressed in black outfits.

Cordelia sang out, " _He had it coming!"_

Then Amy, " _He had it coming!"_

Spike could only smirk as the Faith said her line of, " _He only had himself to blame!"_

It seemed Xander had taken his advice on what song all the girls could sing, Spike had always loved this part of the musical Chicago.

Now Red's turn now, " _If you had seen it!"_

" _I betcha_..." Buffy muttered.

" _You would have done the same_!" Xander finished with a laugh holding up a trophy.

The talent show had been won it seemed.

***

Richard Wilkins leaned back in his chair and contemplated the young man sitting across from him. Lindsey MacDonald was a rising star with Wolfram & Hart until that regrettable bit with the Hyena. It was a lesson that Richard had learned early on in his career. As his first wife could attest, if it hadn't been for the demon she had been scarified, to in order to advance said career. But Richard was sure she had understood.

"I appreciate you coming so late. I'm sure you will understand the urgent and also how...delicate this matter is." Richard stood up and walked out from behind his desk, he stopped by Lindsey and received a charming smile. And thought again what a wonderful politician the young man would make.

"I can be very delicate..." the young man murmured.

"Do you think you can handle this?"

Lindsey shrugged, "It's a bit out of my comfort zone, but I have a client who might know a beast that has connections. He should be able to get who you need."

Richard nodded with a thoughtful frown, "Do you really think subcontracting is the way to go?" He walked over to a nearby cabinet and opened it. Inside on the shelves were tricks of the trade, occult paraphernalia of all sorts. Shrunken heads, a fetus persevered in a glass jar, various urns with symbols in dead languages on them, a crystal skull wedged in to a corner of the shelf.

"Well, I've heard that the gentlemen that you considering has worked in your town before, he has quite the reputation. If that's anything to go by...well you'll get resolution."

"Yes," Richard said sardonically, "But will it be the one I want?"

***

"...Not to mention Spike!" Buffy said with a soft snarl. She couldn't believe that Xander was letting the Bleached Wonder hang around! It was disturbing to her slayer senses and the fact that Faith liked to flirt so openly with Xander. Buffy was just waiting for the fight between her sister slayer and the blonde vampire to happen.

"Don't start on Spike, Bufffy." Xander grumbled sleepily from behind her dark sunglasses. They were walking through the colonnade towards cafeteria. Buffy wondered why Xander was so tired. Buffy never had that much trouble with the late night patrols. She was sure Spike had something to do with that. And that was something she didn't what to think about.

"Why shouldn't I start on Spike? After all he's only a bloodsucking fiend that stalks the innocent?"

Xander took off the shades to rub her eyes, "Buff, he's bagging it."

"How do you know that?" Buffy demanded.

"Because he told me?" The 'duh' in Xander's voice obvious, "Besides Mom gets the bad and out of date blood from the hospital for him."

"But do you know if he's actually drinking it and not hunting?"

"He told me." The dark haired girl repeated dully.

"Oh, well then. That makes sense." Buffy nodded, "Did it ever a cur to you that he's lying?"

"He's not lying." This was said flatly.

"How do you know?"

Xander sighed as she pulled opened the door to the cafeteria, "You know Spike's eyebrow, the scarred one?"

Buffy nodded.

"Well, when Spike lies to me...his eyebrow twitches."

"Oh."

Xander rolled her eyes and hoped to the gods that this conversation was over. Because really she was getting tired of it, the Slayer had no right. Considering the fact she was still seeing Deadboy. And the first time Buffy brings up the lack of Spike having a soul, well, Xander was going to lose it. As if having a soul made you good. No having one just made you aware of what was good and evil, right or wrong. A soul in Xander's opinion was what you made of it. They walked through the door, Xander saw table after table laid out with **Milkbar Fund Raising** chocolate. There was something she was...something about the chocolate she knew...but her memory was fuzzy here. What she knew was something about it had lead to Joyce and Giles having sex on a police car. Why that was Xander didn't know though. She scratched her head then shrugged. It was chocolate how bad could it be? Xander saw Faith and Jonathan when Snyder hands them each a box of the chocolate, the looks of disgust and confusion that the two gave the principal were funny. Buffy, Xander had noticed had wandered over to Willow and the others her standing, each of them holding a box of chocolate, talking among themselves.

Faith and Jonathan got way from the troll as quickly as they could when they see Xander, "Can you believe him?" Faith asked.

"We're not even in band." Jonathan said.

"Which would be a problem if he put a trombone in your hand. Guys! It's chocolate!" Xander told the two of them. Jonathan shoved his box of chocolate at Xander, who almost drops it in surprise," Allergic," he muttered before walking away.

Xander nodded, that was sad, she open the box and pulled out one of the candy bars.

"Eww!" Faith said her nose wrinkling cutely, "Your not actually going to eat that, are you?"

"It's. Chocolate." Xander said slowly.

"It's school issued chocolate. I thought you had better taste than that!" And with remarked Faith sounded a lot like Cordelia.

"It's chocolate." Xander repeated. Faith shook her head and shoved her box at Xander as well. Xander caught the box with a shrug and took a bite of the candy bar.

***

Giles was rubbing the side of his head when Xander walked into the library later that night. Xander and her mother had gotten into a disagreement. It had been about if Xander could have a car or not.

Her mother had said not.

"Giles? You okay?" Xander asked the man.

Giles blinked at her, "Xander?"

"Training session with you and Buff? Remember." Xander to her surprise enjoyed the training sessions. She liked learning what was normally only taught to Slayers. " Faith said she'd patrol for me tonight." Xander looked around, "Where is our favorite Slayer?"

"Well, she was here. Then said her mother wanted her home."

"Really?" Xander said picking up the strip on cloth that lay on the table and started to play with it, "Because mom got a call from Joyce just before I left. They were going to go to the Expresso Pump."

"So she lied." Giles said with a disappointed sigh, he leaned over and picked up the ball at his feet. "What could be more important than her training?"

"You know the answer to that. If I were you I'd talk to her mom about it." Xander said dropping the cloth back onto the table. "So, I was thinking..." But she trailed off because Giles was already retreating into his office. She stood there as he quietly shut the door. It was a clear dismissal. "I'll just go...then."

***

Xander was walking down the middle of Main Street, when she heard her name being called looking behind her and saw Spike making his way to her.

"What are you doing here?" She asked him.

"Could ask the same of you, pet. Thought you were training with the Watcher?"

Xander shrugged carelessly, "Buffy bailed."

"Yeah, bint showed up at the mansion. She and Peaches were making goo-goo eyes at each other. Sickening, it was." Spike said. "So, what are you doing? Patrol?"

Xander shook her head and pulled out a candy bar from her pocket, "Nah, Faith as that covered. Thought I'd catch the Creature Feature at the movie theater."

"Really, pet. What's playing?" Spike asked sounding vaguely interested.

"Those old monster movies from the thirties and forties. You know the ones with that Bell-dude and Boris guy." She said taking a bite of the chocolate.

"Oh, the black and whites?" Spike asked because he thought that colorizing those films was just wrong!

Xander nodded.

"Care for some company then?"

"Sure," Xander said with a grin. Because movies were so much better when you could watch with someone, " We can even sit down front so you can bitch at the screen."

"You're to good to me, pet." Spike smiled then, almost causing Xander to choke on the chocolate she was eating because it was one of the vampire's true smiles. The one that made his face light up and almost seem to glow.

Xander shook herself, "Well, comes on. I don't want to miss the previews."

"Hey, Pet? Did I ever tell you about the time I actually met..."

***

In a factory across town from theater, workers were putting candy bars in boxes. One of the workers stopped and looked at the candy bar in his hand. He was so hungry, he had skipped lunch that day, he was about to open it when an accented voice said, "Trust me, you don't want to eat that." The worker turned to his the dark haired man that was in charge of the operation standing behind him. He quickly dropped the candy bar back in the box and went back to packing the chocolate in the box.

Ethan Rayne sighed. It seemed good help really was hard to find, he thought as he walked away from the worker. He really hadn't wanted to come back to SunnyDale. But the pay for this job was too good to resist. And there was always a chance he would see Ripper. Ethan had heard that Ripper had gotten married and wanted to see what kind of woman could hold Ripper's heart.

After all Ethan already knew what kind of man could.

***

Xander sat in study hall eating a chocolate bar she looked up when Faith said to Jonathan, "No, really it's a rule! If the teacher is more than ten seconds late we can leave."

Buffy leaned over and asked Xander, "I thought it was Giles turn to watch study hall?"

Xander frowned, "It is and Giles is never late."

"He's wound a little tight." Cordelia said.

Xander snorted, "Don't know why? He shouldn't be with all the sex he's having with my mom. They woke me up again."

Buffy wrinkled up her nose in a way Xander thought that Buffy thought was cute, only it made her look like one of those little Pug dogs. "Xan, you really need to stop with the over sharing."

"Agh! I can't believe your still eating those things!" Faith said when she saw Xander eating her candy bar.

"I like chocolate! There's no bad here!" Xander exclaimed.

"I can't believe you have any of those left. I've sold...like...four boxes already." Cordelia said.

Xander gave the cheerleader a blank look and asked, "Sold?"

Cordelia shook her head at Xander's remark, "Willow is right, you are hopeless."

Xander rolled her eyes and was about to volley her comeback when the door to the classroom opened and Ms. Barton walked in. "Hey!" She greeted the class with a vague smile, "Let's just sit and pretend to read something. Then when we are sure that Commandant Snyder is really gone, we're so out of here!"

"Anyone else want to marry, Ms. Barton?" Faith asked.

"Get in line." Jonathan told the other slayer.

"I guess Giles isn't coming?" Buffy said confused.

"Guess not." Xander said unconcerned then pulled out a couple of candy bars and held them out to Buffy, "Chocolate?"

***

After school Xander had Buffy by the hand and was pulling her into the house as she said, "You need to help me pick something to wear."

"For what?" Buffy asked eating a piece of chocolate.

"The Bronze tonight. It's Faith turn to patrol and I'm not staying here and doing homework!"

Buffy nodded at the answer. As the girls past the living room they could see Giles, Jessica and Joyce sprawled out on the floor looking at Giles record collection. The girls didn't stop but went straight to Xander's room. Buffy helped pick out Xander's outfit and made her promise to actually wear it.  Buffy told her they would meet up at the Bronze then went home to get ready herself. As Xander got ready to go she went back down stairs and walked into the living room and saw Joyce was sitting next to her mom and that Giles was standing next to the fireplace.

"I'm going to the Bronze, Mom." Xander said.

"Oh!" Jessica said and Xander thought she looked a little flustered.

"It's okay, right?"

"Hummm, yes!"

"Okay..." Xander turning to leave said, "Just make sure Giles uses an ashtray and that Joyce doesn't spill her beer."

After the girl had left Jessica pouted, "I hate those heighten senses of hers'. I can't do anything without her knowing."

Giles nodded as he lit his cigarette, as did Joyce as she reached down and picked up the beer bottle she had hidden under the coffee table.

***

Spike walked into the club and couldn't believe what he was seeing. All of the adults were acting like teenagers. It had to be something Hellmouthy. He could only caught glimpse of the Scooby gang, here and there. The cheerleader and Red were cuddled up on a love seat; Red was dress far more provocatively than he had ever seen her. The Geek and his girl looked like they were having fight by the bar. It was then Spike bumped into Angel, as in actually bumping into him.

"Have you seen Buffy?" Angel asked him.

Spike shook his head. He hadn't seen the blond slayer. He was much to busy looking for his own girl. And was about to say so when Harmony came up to them.

"Blondie Bear, I think we should talk." The blonde said as Angel wandered away sniggering.

"I think we should see other people..."

_This was going to be a long night_ , Spike thought.

***

Lindsey had to admit...this was something, as he weaved his way to the bar. It was the only time in which adults (drugged as they were) and teenagers would ever see eye to eye. He got to the bar and ordered a beer, the bartender gave it to him and he turned to face the stage, the local band was playing a sensual song. It was familiar; he couldn't remember the name of it though. Something by Siouxise and the Banshees, maybe, Lindsey thought. He weaved his way through the dancing teens and adults. When he bumped into a brunette, dressed in a light blue see-through blouse with a white bra under it. A short black leather skirt that ended mid-thigh, bare legs and black leather...Well, the only name Lindsey knew them by were bitch boots. The woman turned around...

~ _Face to face...my lovely foe...~_

Xander had been dancing minding her own business. She was bumped into by, "...Lindsey..." Lindsey shivered at the way Xander had purred out his name. She put her arms around the lawyer neck and leaned close asking, "Dance with me?"

"So, what's with the change of heart?" Lindsey asked, "Normally you can't stand to be in a room with me."

"You know most guys wouldn't be questioning their luck." Xander muttered in his ear.

~ _Commit your crime in your deadly time_...~

"I'm not most guys, I know you, Darlin'."

Xander smirked at him and slowly turned in his arms so her back was against his chest, "Uhmm, how well you know me..." one arms was still wrapped around Lindsey's neck. Xander went to pull away from Lindsey but he grabbed her arm and yanked her back against him. He was not about to let this woman leave his arms now that he finely had her back in them.

~ _Another life...another time_...~

"You're not good for me, Linds." Xander told him when she felt his lips against her neck. Lindsey's right hand held his beer bottle, as his left trailed down her side to her hip.

"Could be really *good* to you if you let me." Lindsey said seductively, causing Xander to groan and melt into his arms. His right hand dropped down, his finger gilding along the edge of her skirt, the coolness of the beer bottle he still held sent a chill down her spine. Because Xander for some reason really wanted to throw caution to the wind. She wanted Lindsey to touch her, to make her feel...but she knew...

Xander looked across the dance floor in time to see Harmony slap Spike's face Xander watched drowsily while Harmony left Spike in a huff, Lindsey's lips had moved down her neck and to her shoulder where Lindsey's left hand came up and undid the top button of her blouse, so his lips could leave a burning trail across her collarbone.

~ _They say follow your heart...Follow it through...but it's hard to do when you're split in two...~_

Spike cursed the blonde bint as he rubbed the cheek Harmony had slapped. Like it was his fault the girl thought a romp between the sheets meant more than it did for her than it did him! He lit a cigarette and looked around, Angel was in a corner having an intense conversation with the Slayer who was dressed as slutty as she ever did. No like his girl.

No, his Xander would never be dressed in a see-through blouse and a short skirt, dancing with someone she shouldn't be...wait a mo'...He looked again and blinked. Shook his head and blinked again but the scene didn't change.

Xander was on the dance floor, rubbing and grinding against that soddin' lawyer!

~ _To die like this...with one last kiss...~_

Xander turned back to face Lindsey, she didn't like the betrayed look that had crossed Spike's face. It not like Spike * had * any right to feel betrayed. Xander let Lindsey kiss her. It felt just like she remembered. Low, sensual, powerful and there was a bitter taste to it. One that Xander was sure hadn't been there before, but it wasn't...wasn't...

~ _I hate to stay but oh, I hate to leave...~_

"Remember this, Lindsey." Xander whispered in his ear, "How I taste, how I feel..."Lindsey pulled away to look at her, "Let the 'might have been' torture you...late at night when you are alone," Lindsey dropped his arms from around her and stepped back at the venom in her voice. "Because you'll never have me again, no matter how much you wish you could." Xander then turned and walked away from Lindsey but stopped at the edge of the dance floor and looked back at him...

~ _And you'll never know_...~

Xander graced Lindsey with a sweet smile that was so at odds with her words moments ago, Lindsey wasn't sure what to believe.

***

Xander knew she had just confused the hell out of Lindsey. When Spike grabbed her by the arm and pulled her through the Bronze, she snagged her leather jacket from the nearby table, until they got to the back exit. He then gave her a glare and dragged her outside into the alley. She gave him a glare and just finished putting on her jacket when Spike slammed her against the wall of the Bronze, pinning her there with his body, "Just what the fuck was that?"

"Spike, you're hurting me!" Xander growl lowly, then purred out as she rubbed her hips against Spike's crotch, "Do it again."  That caused Spike to back off but he didn't let Xander go. Something was wrong. He had known that since he had seen how his girl was dressed but Spike wasn't sure what was it was.

"What's with you?" Spike asked but didn't really expect an answer.

Xander gave him a sultry grin, "What you didn't like my little performance? Cause I bet Lindsey did. Up until I told him he couldn't have me."

Spike shook his head. Xander's previous relationship with the lawyer irritated the blond vampire, "It's not like you to tease the bad guys. Well, not like that anyway!"

Xander licked her lips and leaned close to him. "Oh, I don't know about that. I tease you, don't I?"

Spike at this shoved Xander back against the wall hard, "You little..." he trailed off as he sank his hands into the girl's dark hair, holding her head steady as his lips covered Xander's with a low growling moan. _How dare she..._ Spike thought, all this time Xander had been working him like a pro. Giving him just enough to keep him coming back for more. One of his hands dropped down to Xander's waist, then to her thigh as he worked his hand up under the leather skirt she wore, his other hand continued to hold her by the bicep. She tasted... Xander tasted like death in late twilight, the spice of cinnamon and...chocolate. God, did she ever taste of chocolate. _'Closer,'_ Spike thought as he tangled his tongue with Xander's. Spike had to get closer to that taste! It took everything he had to pull away from the temptation in his arms.

"What? Why are you stopping!" Xander asked dazedly. She wrapped a hand behind Spike's neck and tried to bring him back to her, "No stopping!"

"Wait, pet!"

"No! Not waiting!" Xander hissed, "I _want_ you. And I want this... _Now!"_ She yanked him back to her and covered his mouth with hers. She kissed him for a while then slid one of her left hand down his chest, down his stomach. Push up his black T-shirt exposing taunt pearly white skin. But when Xander popped the top button to Spike's jeans he jerked back slightly from her.

"Christ! Xander," Spike hissed at her, "we're in an alley!"

Xander gave him the 'are you stupid?' look. "Yeah, so? What? Are you a girl now?" Xander asked, exasperated at the blond vampire. She never thought Spike would put up so much resistance. All Xander wanted was to fuck Spike and have more chocolate. Was that really too much to ask?

Spike glared at her as he stated, "We are in the alley behind the Bronze, pet," as if Xander didn't know that already! "I just think..." Spike started to continue but Xander kissed him hot, hard and wet...

"Damn it, Xander!" Spike groaned panting as he forced himself away from the dark haired girl again.

"God!" Xander muttered frustraightly, "you really are... _Yes!_ Spike I'm saying, _yes_ to this!"

Spike closed his eyes a low groan escaped him when Xander wriggled against him. "I know, pet. I know you are! But... Wouldn't you like to do this where we won't get interrupted?" Xander gave Spike an unconvinced look. Her grip on his neck tightened as if she thought he might get away. Which was in fact the last thing Spike wanted. Ever.

"Just," Spike said softly, seductively, "I could be good, here and now. But let me show you have much better I am in a nice soft bed..."

Xander frowned at him. Thinking. Why was he making her think? _'Was he being difficult on purpose_ ,' she wondered? All Xander wanted was chocolate and to...fuck Spike? Well, she was pretty sure that's what she wanted. "You know, by the time we get to this nice soft bed, I might not be in the mood any more."

Spike grinned. "Don't worry, pet," he said before kissing her slowly, deeply, "I 'm sure I can keep you interested until we get there."

Xander gave him a doubt full look. Spike stepped away from her and she straightened her clothes. They started down the alley to the street Xander reached into one of the inside pockets to her leather jacket and pulled out a candy bar. She tore open the wrapper and broke off a piece and shoved it into her mouth. At Spike's look she held out the candy bar to him, "Chocolate?"

***

Faith sighed as she hung up her cell phone. Xander wasn't answering. And she left a whole lot of messages. She had tried Jessica's and Giles cells too. It was the same thing with them. She couldn't get Buffy on her cell phone eigher. Faith didn't understand why Xander wasn't answering though. 

"No, answer? Huh." Jonathan asked as he kept a watchful eye on Snyder.

Who was spinning around in small circles? He started following her and Jonathan when the little man saw them in the Bronze. Faith had bumped into Jonathan after Xander's little show. What had worried her was that he had been crying but wouldn't say what happened.

Faith nodded to Jonathan as she asked, "What could she be doing that would keep her from answering her cell phone?"

***

When Xander's cell phone rang for what had to be the millionth time! She pulled it out of her pocket and threw it away from her not bothering to watch where it landed, because she had Spike pressed up against a tree, her tongue in his mouth and a hand below his belt, rubbing the jean covered bulge. Spike's hands were cupping her face and he was kissing her back like a starving man...well, vampire. With a low moan Spike reversed their positions. Xander groaned she could feel the rough hardness of the tree against her back. Spike suddenly dropped to his knees. He began to work his hands up under Xander's leather skirt. Xander shifted around until she in a good position then relaxed pulling out a candy bar from her jacket pocket. Xander took a bite of it just as Spike pushed her legs apart.

***

Jessica was woman enough to admit she was almost jealous of the long purple jacket. That Rupert had stolen for Joyce. It wasn't fair. She was his wife he should be steeling things for her! Rupert threw down his cigarette and crooked a finger at Jessica. She walked over to him with a slight pout. He pointed at the display in the window in front of them. There on the mannequin was a white leather trench coat. Rupert raised an eyebrow at her as if to ask _'well?'_

Jessica smiled at him knowingly.

Rupert grinned and twirled the crowbar in his hand, shattering the window.

***

Angel lightly pushed Buffy into the room, wiping his mouth as he did so. He didn't really like chocolate but this stuff, he popped the last piece of the candy bar he had into his mouth, was pretty good. He wrapped his hands around Buffy's waist pulling her fully against him. He dropped soft kisses on her neck. Buffy turned and gave him a knowing look and led him toward the sofa. There was something wrong with this he knew... Knew he didn't deserve the beauty in his arms. But couldn't stop himself. When Buffy gave a surprised squeak Angel looked over her shoulder and saw Spike.

Spike was stretched out on the soft, white, shag carpet, dressed only in his black jeans. Xander was straddling the blond, kissing Spike's chest, still wearing her white bra and short black leather skirt with those very sexy black boots. Her jacket was tossed carelessly on the floor by them as was a thin almost see through blue blouse.

Buffy looked at Angel her eyes big and round, "They're very pretty together..." she said guilelessly.

"That they are, beloved..."

***

Faith snarled at Giles, "Take them home!" She pointed at Jessica and Joyce. She had tried to reason with them, had even showed the bent she had put in Jessica's car. But they continued to act like teenagers!

Giles sneered at her. _'Uppity, bint_ ,' he thought, _'I'm her Watcher. She should obey_ me.' He was about to actually say so when he caught sight of a dark haired man talking on a cell phone.

"Yeah, I've been out there. Town's wide open. You guys can move anytime..." There was a tap on his shoulder he paused in his conversation. Turning to see Ripper and Faith standing behind him. "...You might want to hurry!"

Giles punched Ethan Rayne in the face.

***

Xander groaned softly when her back hit the floor. Buffy crawled on top of her, wrapping a locks of Xander's dark hair around her fingers. She shoved her leg between Xander's, her other hand lightly caresses Xander's breast before lowing her head and kissing the other girl deeply.

Spike handed Angel a cigarette as they admired the feast for the eyes in front of them.

"Quite fetching together, aren't they?" he said digging a chocolate bar out of Xander's jacket pocket. He knew the girl had a whole stash of them through out the many pockets of the jacket.

"That they are, lad..."Angel said as he took the cigarette but frowned when Spike didn't offer him any of the chocolate. Oh, well, he'd just have to take it from the blond.

***

"He's lying!" Giles said coldly, "hit him again."

Faith frowned looking at Ethan Rayne. Who she had discovered was a Chaos Mage that had caused the Scooby's problems before. "I don't think he is." She looked over at Jonathan and Snyder as they watched the two older women make out in the corner of the warehouse, one with open lust the other with horror.

Ethan nodded desperately. Anything not to get hit again! "It's true! I'm only subcontracting. It's MacDonald, you want. I'm just helping them collect the tribute..."then muttered, "For a demon."

"Of course, you are," Faith growled. "What demon?"

"I...don't... remember?" Ethan said slowly because if he told the Mayor would kill him.

Faith hit him in the nose.

"Yes!" Rupert said jumping up and swung his fist in the air. It was always a good thing when Ethan hurt...Rupert wanted Ethan to hurt just as much as he had when Ethan had left him all those years ago.

"Lurconis! The demon's called Lurconis." Ethan all but shouted when Faith pulled back her fist again, "They wanted a way to get the tribute away from the people."

"So, you're Diversion Guy?" Faith asked.

"More than a diversion. They said the tribute was so big that people would never let them take it. That people had to be out of it. And later on, when the candy wore off, they'd blame themselves."

Faith stepped closer and leaned into Ethan's space, "Which brings us to the grand prize question. And believe me when I say, you answer this wrong, and you lose all your bonus points..."

Behind Faith Ethan can see the mean look on Giles face.

"What's the tribute?"

"I don't know! They never told me that! I don't! I really don't know!" Ethan said earnestly.

Faith pulled back her fist.

Ethan closed his eyes resigned. He really didn't know. And yes he had lied to Ripper before but that had been for his own good all those years ago. He wished Ripper would believe just this once... The punch never came. Ethan opened his eyes. Faith was frowning at Ripper, who had his hand wrapped around her wrist, staying her punch just inches from Ethan's face.

"I believe you." Ripper said softly but his expression promised pain if this was a trick.

Ethan just sighed in relief.

***

At **SunnyDale General Hospital** four vampires walked down the long white hallway. Pasted the night duty nurse who was watching T.V. ignoring the ringing phones and flashing call lights. The four vampires walked through a door on the wall beside it in black block letters were two words.

**Maternity Ward**.

***

Buffy's loud moan caused Xander to open her eyes. She relaxed with a sigh as cool lips trailed up her neck. Taking in the sight she said, "Didn't know Buffy could be that bendy."

The soft breath of a laugh tickled her neck, "Can't wait to show you what our Sweet William can do..."

Xander turned in Angel's lap. There was something... Ahh, that's was it, she looped her arms around Angel's neck and asked, "Think I would enjoy that?" Angel turned and lifted her up on the sofa, kissing her neck and down her collarbone. Xander snagged her jacket from the floor. She pulled out other bar of chocolate.  Something wasn't right she knew but... Well, Buffy was being thoroughly pleasured by Spike and it was only fair that Angel return the favor. Xander looked over Angel's broad, really broad shoulders...Why didn't she ever notice that before?

 Spike and Buffy writhed on the floor.

"That really is kind of hot." Xander muttered as she opened the candy bar.

Angel snickered in her ear, "Yeah, lass, they are..."

***

Oz flipped through the old book as Amy talked on the phone with Faith. He was worried. Things that ate babies were bad.

***

At the hospital Jessica was talking to the night duty nurse. She was looking more and more unhappy with what she was being told.

"...So you married the dark haired one, Ripper?" Ethan asked.

Ripper nodded.

"So, this thing eats babies?" Joyce asked.

Ethan looked upset. He really hadn't known what the tribute was. "I swear I didn't know, Ripper."

Rupert nodded, "I know. You're a lot of things but... You'd never condone this; you're not a baby killer. Make this right, Ethan. Help us."

Jessica walked away from the nurse cursing under her breath when she got to the others, "Said she didn't see anything, stupid bitch!"

"We know who took them." Faith growled. Someone was going down for this!

"Let's do something." Ripper hissed he couldn't stand by, not the babies lives on the line.

"Find the demon and kick the crap out of it." Ethan said coldly. The sacrifice of children was one of the few things he couldn't stomach. It was just plain wrong. Ripper he noticed smiled that deadly smile Ethan so loved. Err...when it wasn't aimed at him, of course.

Jessica watched Ethan as he watched Rupert. She was so going to have to talk to them. She wouldn't put up with Rupert cheating on her with Ethan. And if those looks were anything to go by... Ethan was good looking... She could make a place for one more in her bed. Did that make her a slut?

"If we knew were they were." Faith said while pacing. She really wished X' or B' were here. They would know what to do.

"What happens now?" Snyder asked.

"Lurconis dwells beneath the city," Rupert said softly slowly as if he wasn't quite sure, "filth to filth."

"What?" Faith asked.

"I know this." Ethan said, "The sewers!"

"The sewers?" Joyce asked as she leaned into Jessica for a hug. Joyce hadn't taken her and Jessica's making out or the thing with Ripper and the police car too seriously. It had been fun but that was all. She had seen the looks passed between Ethan and Rupert. Joyce would cut Rupert's heart out with a spoon if he did something stupid without talking about it and hurt Jessica because if it.

"Oh, good!" Snyder said. He so could not be involved. No matter how cool he thought these people were. If the Mayor found out... "You go do that thing with the demon.  I'll just stay here in case the babies, you know, uh...find their way back."

Everyone looked at the little man in disbelief.

"Snyder, go home!" Faith finally said.

Snyder nodded, "I can do that!" He all but ran from the room.

Faith looked at the others, Giles, Jessica, Buffy's mom, a Chaos mage and Jonathan looked back at her. "We're going to the sewers." Faith sighed to herself as they walked to the stairs.

  _'I hope B'and X' are having more fun than I am'_ Faith thought grumpily.

***

Xander cock her head to one side than to the other side as she watched to two vampires getting down and dirty with each other. She took a bite of the candy bar, "I didn't know Spike was that bendy, I mean Angel implied it, but..." she passed it over to Buffy.

Buffy tilted her head and gave the two grunting and snarling vampires a long look, "It's like a cross between the WWF and National Graphics." Xander had to snicker at the comparison.

"It's hot. It shouldn't be hot!" Buffy said shaking her head and looking at Xander, "Why are they so hot like that?"

Xander yanked her gaze away from the sweaty, growling men, she took a bite of the candy bar before saying, "Maybe because their vampires?"

Buffy let out a relieved sigh, "Yeah, okay, that makes sense."

Xander shook her head sadly at the Slayer, taking another bite of chocolate before handing it back to the blond, then resumed watching the two vampires. "Huh, they are very pretty this way..."

"Yes, yes they are." Buffy said with a firm nod as she took a bite of the candy bar.

***

The sewer tunnels under SunnyDale were dark and wet, lit only by the torches on the walls. Mayor Wilkins had chosen a spot in the back to watch the ritual. He sighed as he looked at the sewer in concern he pulled out his cell phone and dialed his office.

MacDonald watched stone-faced as the four vampire dressed in red robes anointed the foreheads of the babies with water from a nearby pool. Only one of the babies was crying.

"...Tomorrow about sewer maintence," Wilkins said into his phone, "I have some concerns regarding exposed gas pipes, infrastructure and ventilation..."Wilkins paused when he heard a slight sound behind him. He turned just as Faith dropped down from a manhole.

"Hi," Faith grinned at him before she slammed her fist into the Mayor's face.

***

Xander sat up slowly with a moan. Her head hurt. And boy, did it ever hurt! It was like the worst hangover ever. But Xander didn't remember drinking anything only... She frowned and looked around then down. Xander saw that she was mostly naked. The small blanket that one of them pulled off the sofa barely covered anything, much less the four of them. She was between Spike and Angel she could see Buffy's golden hair on the other side of Angel. Dear Goddess! What did they do? Xander frowned and poked Angel in the side, then again until he opened his eyes.

"What?" Angel snarled going into his demon face and blinking sleepily. He resembled a disgruntled kitten and in no, way did Xander find that cute, she told herself.

"No, homicidal tendencies? Want to stalk blonde girls or have a raging desire to destroy the world?" Xander asked Angel vaguely worried.

 "The only desire I have, is to go back to sleep." Angel hissed at her. Turning over he wrapped an arm around Buffy muttering, "God, my head hurts."

A snigger from the other side of Xander caused her to look at Spike as he yawned, "Poof never did like the early wake up."

"But... Angelus..."

Spike gave Xander a look that said she was being dumb, "Not like Peaches will ever have perfect happiness, now that he knows the consequences of lying to himself about who and what he is. So the point is mote."

"What did we do last night?" Xander muttered to herself.

Spike sat up and pulled his duster to him digging around in a pocket until he got his cigarettes and his Zippo lighter. "Well, I'm naked, you're naked, as are the Poof and the Slayer. I don't know about you," He mumbled as he put a cigarette in his mouth and lit it, "but I'm thinking we had a hell of a good time!"

"Be quiet! Or leave!" Angel growled.

Buffy made a sleepy sound of agreement. Then her eyes popped open she sat up clutching more than her fair share of the blanket to her, "Why am I naked?" A wild look came to her eyes when she saw the others.

"Are you naked? Why are you three naked? Why is Spike naked near me? Tell me I didn't sleep with Spike!" The last ended on a shriek that had the two vampires and Xander moaning in pain.

"Buffy," Xander said dropping her head into her hands. The painful pounding of her temples getting worse and spoke for all of them, when Xander told Buffy to, "Shut up!"

***

Xander stumbled through the front door she had broke the heel of her right her boot on the way home. After dealing with Buffy's freak out. Because Spike, after he had got over having been insulted by the Slayer's reaction thought it was... Spike had started to tease the blonde. It had taken Xander sitting on the other girl to keep her from do Spike real harm. Angel had been useless taking the, hear no evil, see no evil route and had buried his head under the blanket.

Xander was heading up stairs when she heard the voices coming from the kitchen. Looking through the door she saw her mother, Giles... and Ethan Rayne?

"Xander honey? It's almost noon I was about to get worried." Jessica said softly, carefully as if each word hurt, when she saw her daughter standing in the doorway. She got up and walked over to her. The other two men were talking softly in the same way. Only Rayne wasn't wincing. Which would make sense. Why would he eat his own product, knowing what it would do, as well as the after effects?

"Buffy called hour ago and said you were on your way here."

A normal twenty-minute walk took so long because Xander had to stop and fight the nausea that threatened to overwhelm her. The sunlight hurt her eyes making them water, so she had tried to stay in the shady spots. The dizziness didn't help either.

"Where were you last night?" Jessica asked and was surprised when her daughter blushed a tomato red.

"Why is Ethan Rayne here?" Xander asked. "He was a bad guy last time I checked."

"Not a bad guy," Jessica said, thinking back to how Ethan had saved one of the babies, that were going to be sacrifced, life at risk to his own, "Just misunderstood."

Xander started to say something then changed her mind, "Look I can't do this now. My head is killing me! So I'll make you a deal. You don't ask about last night and I won't ask you about police cars," Jessica's eyes widen and wondered how Xander knew about that, "or that six hundred dollar coat you're wearing."

Jessica looked down at the coat then back at Xander, "Deal!"

"Great," Xander muttered turning and going to go up stairs when she heard Giles say, "Jessica, please come and tell this moron that idea just won't work! The bed's to small!"

It caused Xander to pause for a moment. But only a moment because Xander didn't want to know what that was about. She was very sure she didn't want to know!

 


	16. Stalled Feelings

"WHAT THE HELL WAS IN THAT CHOCOLATE?!"

Jessica sighed as she walked into the kitchen, it did not surprised her to see Ethan Rayne pinned to the kitchen table by her daughter. It was always unnerving when she saw Xander in her Primal form. Her daughter was, beautiful and terrifying this way. Ethan though seemed to take the girl's new appearance in stride. Leering at Xander in a way that would have upset Jessica if the man hadn't just rolled out of her and Rupert's bed.

"Xander you should really let Ethan up, if you want answers. I don't think that shade of purple is natural." Jessica said as she made her way over to the coffee pot. It was just too early for this...

"Not until he tells me!"

Jessica saw the smarmy grin cross Ethan's face as he said; "One would think you like me in this position."

Xander growled low, "You son of..."

"Now, now...you shouldn't use such language in front of a lady like your mother."

Jessica saw Xander's hand tighten around the man's throat slightly.

"Xander, Rupert would be upset if you damage him." Jessica said as she pours a cup of coffee. "He so enjoys doing that himself..." Jessica took a sip of coffee and watched Xander comprehended just what she had said. That 'Eww' look took over her daughter's face, Jessica stifled a laugh as Xander quickly dropped the older man.

"I _sooo_ did not need to know that!" Xander moaned.

Jessica just poured another cup of coffee and handed to Ethan, he thanked her for it. Xander hissed wordlessly as she threw herself into a chair and glared at them both.

"My dear girl, the chocolate, which I have to say was quite ingenious of me. Only lowers ones inhibitions. It does not make you do anything you _normally wouldn't_ do." Ethan said.

"Great...just great," Xander said rubbing a hand over her face, "So _normally_ I'm a slut." That statement caused Jessica to choke on her coffee and wondered what happened to Xander a couple nights ago. Xander ignored her mother and continued, "That's nice to know."

"If you were inclined..." Ethan at the girl's flashing otherworldly green eyes quickly went on with, " the chocolate does enhances any attraction you might have been suppressing. But if the feelings weren't already there..."

Lindsey...enough said about that subject. Did she really do a version of the Sexy Slayer dance?

Spike. Yeah, that's...Who knew he was that bendy?

Buffy, there was...okay Xander understood that too.

But ANGEL? Where the hell did that come from? Sure he was handsome in a dark and mysterious brooding sort of way...well, damn it.

Xander dropped her head on the table, the thud, made both adults at the table wince.

"Why can't I have an easy life?"

***

"Damn it, Spike!" Xander said shoving him away from her, ever since the thing with the chocolate, Spike had gotten a bit more demanding...in that way. Xander still wasn't sure if...

"Oi!" Spike said from the floor living area of the mansion, "What is wrong with you?"

Xander straighten her clothes, "You're going to fast."

Spike gave the dark haired girl a disbelieving look. This was the same girl that had practically jumped him! "It fast? Pet, we've already had sex!"

"Which wouldn't have happen if it wasn't for bespelled chocolate!"

Spike sighed, "What do you want from me? Because I'm truly confused, you push me away and pull me back. And sometimes I don't know which your doing!"

Xander knew Spike wanted her, wanted sex and maybe even a real relationship. But Xander didn't know if that's what she wanted. All of her relationships started with rushing into sex. Her friendship with Spike was so much more important to her than the fleeting ideal of sex or love. Xander had never been too lucky with those, but the friendships she made those always seemed to last. Or least didn't kill those she cared about in the permanent sense. She could only shake her head and repeat, "It' s just too fast..."

Spike gave her a long look, "Too fast, huh?"

Xander tried not to flinch at the words. Xander knew she wasn't making any sense. But it was how she felt.

Spike shook his head and sighed, "I grew up during the Victorian Era, pet..." He paused at Xander's perplexed look, "I know the value of a long courtship." It took a moment for Xander to get what Spike wasn't saying. He stood up and sat down on the sofa they had been sitting on before Xander had knocked him onto the floor. Slowly he reached for her hand, he stopped about halfway the sofa letting his hand drop on to the cushion. "I can't do this by myself, Xan."

Looking at his hand, Xander realized this was Spike's way of saying he understood, that Xander wasn't ready for more yet. But he was asking for the right to convince her, to show her...Xander smiled as she reached out and took his hand, he smiled back at her. Xander would give anything to always see her vampire smile like that.

"This is nice." Xander told him.

Spike nodded leaning back against the sofa arm so he could look at her, "That it is, pet."

"But Spike," Xander paused, "I am a product of my time." Now it was Spike's turn to look perplexed. Xander grinned, boundaries now set, as she crawled into his lap, "I understand the value of a long make out session."

Spike didn't move.

"Do you?" Xander asked him.

Spike grinned as he kissed her.

***

Study Hall use to be Xander's favorite class, a chance to catch up on sleep, but not today it seemed. No, for the last few days people, (i.e. her friends) decided to enact World War Three. Cordelia and Willow were screaming at each other about some guy that Cordelia at the Bronze. From what Xander could tell both girls had been supposedly been flirting with. Amy and Jonathan were calling each other names...loudly. Faith and Oz weren't saying anything but the heat from their glares could have set fire to something. And Buffy wouldn't meet Xander's eyes.

Xander was pretty sure she had started this, by repeating what Ethan had told her about the chocolate, the day after it happened. When the class was finely, finely over Faith stormed out. Buffy followed shortly after giving Xander a glare. Willow was barely speaking to Cordelia. Jonathan had broken up with Amy and it wasn't looking too good for Oz either.

"Why can't I have a quiet life?" Xander muttered before leaving the classroom.

****

Xander walked into the library and duck the book that came flying at her head. Buffy stood in next to the bookshelf.

"Giles would not approve." Xander said.

Buffy just pulled another book from the shelf and threw it at Xander. That book struck a glance blow to her shoulder, "Oh, come on! Buffy it wasn't my fault!"

"Not your fault? Who gave me the chocolate!"?

"No one said you had to eat it! Weren't you supposed to be on a diet anyway?"

The next book hit Xander square in the middle of her forehead.

****

_'Well never let it be said that Buffy couldn't hold a grudge_ ,' Xander thought rubbing her forehead as she pushed open the door to the cafeteria.

An apple flew past her.

Glancing inside Xander saw that there was a full on food fight going on. Faith and Jonathan were the leaders, directing the other students at the enemy.

The enemy looked to be Amy and Oz.

Xander quickly closed the door when she saw that all four of them had seen her.

****

Xander thanked every god that she knew of that this day was over, as she walked into the library after school. A simple patrol awaited her, one she was going to make last a few hours because it was her mother's day off. She had thought the sex noise were disturbing before, now they honestly scared her.

Ethan was a screamer.

All of her friends were sitting at various tables, Xander started to turn around to leave when, "FREEZE CHOCOLATE PUSHER!" Cordelia voice rang out. Xander closed her eyes as she thought, _'This can only end in tears_.'

After Cordelia got through yelling at Xander about how it had all been her fault and that Xander was never allowed to give them any chocolate or candy related items. Xander had been right. There had been tears. Jonathan had decided that he could no longer be part of a relationship with Oz and Amy after what they had said to him. To which Xander never did find out exactly just what was said. But it must have been bad.

Amy and Oz were just trying to figure out if they wanted to be together or not without Jonathan. Xander didn't think they would. Faith was speaking to Jonathan in a low reassuring tone. That friendship had popped up surprisely fast or perhaps Xander just hadn't noticed it. Come to think of it. Jonathan did go on patrol a lot with Faith so maybe it shouldn't be that much of a surprise.

Buffy tried to throw another book at Xander's head.

***

"OKAY!" Xander shouted at Buffy that night on patrol. She staked a minion that was growling at her. Xander and Spike had met up with Buffy and Angel. And not long after had got jumped by a pack of minions lead by a fledge. "I'm sorry I gave you the chocolate!"

"It's a little late to be sorry!" Buffy said as she punched a nearby vampire in the face.

"I vote we don't talk about it at all and forget it ever happened." Angel muttered as he slammed his foot into a minion's stomach.

"I second that vote!" Xander shouted before she got knocked to the ground by the fledge leading the minions.

Buffy nodded her agreement as she staked the fledge that hit Xander.

Spike just shook his head at the antic of the others as he muttered, "Pathetic, you lot are. Trying to forget a night like that."

****

Spike had Xander pinned to the couch. This was the best part of their make out sessions. When he got the girl to surrender to him a bit, to touch and kiss her. To let Spike show Xander the passion he held for her. Spike was working his hand up under Xander's tee shirt when the front door to the mansion slammed open. The Slayer's high-pitched voice screeched into the room.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE LEAVING!?"

Spike dropped his head into the space where Xander's shoulder and neck met he letting out a sigh of, "Can I please kill her?"

Xander chuckled softly as she gently pushed Spike off her, "Unhappily? No."

"BUFFY! YOU KNOW HOW IT HAS TO BE! WHY ARE YOU MAKING THIS HARDER!?" Angel shouted as he walked into the room.

"BECAUSE IT MAKES NO SENSE! YOU DON'T HAVE TO LEAVE ME!"

"BUFFY I'M NOT LEAVING YOU...just the situation." Angel ended on a whisper.

Xander puffed out an irate groan, "I'm going on patrol. I don't want to hear this." She got up and walked out of the room. Spike cursed the other two in the room for ruining what had been the start of a promising night.

"You know what you're problem is?" Spike said getting the attention of Buffy and Angel.

Angel sighed, "No, but you're going to tell us aren't you."

"Whether we want to hear it or not." Buffy muttered.

Spike stood up and walked over to them, "It's all kill me or love me with you two. Even after what you have put each other through and the googly-eyes are just sickening. Makes me want to heave, it does."

"What are you talking about?" Buffy asked with a glare.

"We are trying to make sure we stay friends." Angel said at the same time.

"Friends?" Spike said with a harsh laugh, "No, children, you desire it too much. Not like you could forget that moments of passion that happened a few days ago."

Angel made a face, "I thought we agreed not to mention that."

"We did. And Xander seconded the vote." Buffy muttered.

"You're _not_   friends! You never can be. You'll be in love until it kills you both. No matter how many lovers you take in order to forget each other. It will always be there just under your skin when you meet. You'll fight, you'll fuck and you will  _hate_ each other for it. But you'll never be friends," Spike pointed to his temple, "Love's not about brains, pets, it's about blood...always and forever about the blood. You can never forget that," He clasped a hand over his heart, "It screams inside you working its will."

Both Buffy and Angel shift uncomfortablely at Spike's words.

"I'm love's bitch. That's all any of us are. I've leaned to live with that truth."

Buffy and Angel turned away from Spike and each other.

"So will you in the end." Spike told them as he then turned and walked out of the room. He had done all he could to make them understand. That some relationships, some people could never end with any thing so benign as friendship.

 

**Author's Note:**

> NO BETA!!!!!  
> IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY SPELLING OR GRAMMER?  
> GO READ ANOTHER AUTHOR"S WORK.  
> My Tumblr: lln3dseethelight.tumblr.com  
> Come talk to me


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